Entries Tagged as 'office'

But it was so cute when the baby panda did it!

March 21st, 2012 · 37 Comments

One of the employees at Rebecca’s workplace in Toronto is unfortunately prone to surprise sneezing fits…much to the chagrin of a certain co-worker. After one too many gesundheits, this coworker apparently decided to go public with her message, posting this note where the sneezer  — god bless her — would be sure to see it.

(ALEX PLEASE DO NOT SNEEZE ON ME!) (COVER YOUR MOUTH!)

extra credit:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2QAGVMlns4

related: You’re not wrong, Walter…

Tags: CAPS LOCK · heartwarming compassion · hygiene · office · Toronto

Debbie downed ’er

March 4th, 2012 · 53 Comments

Debbie, Debbie, Debbie…what are we going to do with you? Your coworkers seem a bit incensed.

Not Debbie's

Don’t worry, Deb — this one’s all yours

 

related: Especially Deborah

Tags: blitzkrieg approach · food · Hawaii · most popular notes of 2012 · office fridge

Very unfortunate, indeed.

February 22nd, 2012 · 55 Comments

Our submitter in Ohio came into work recently to find this disturbing notice on the door of the women’s restroom. Even more disturbing? This apparently wasn’t the first time this type of incident has occurred.

Our submitter says a group of coworkers spend all morning trying to figure out the logistics of how this shit went down. “The stall is really not that big,” she says, “and in order to miss the toilet, one would have to be standing, practically leaning on the wall, rotated 90 degrees from the usual use of a toilet…and then somehow not see what happened or subsequently decide not to clean it up.”

Very unfortunate, indeed.

Sadly, I think Drew of Toothpaste for Dinner has a point:

Hey, Guess What!!  If someone's shitting on the floor, they probably aren't going to stop if you shame them with a stall memo.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

related: THE MAD BOMBER: Never Forget!

Tags: bathroom · bold-underlined-caps · Cleveland · office · shit · that's disgusting · WTF?

Rage Against the (Coffee) Machine

February 16th, 2012 · 77 Comments

Putting decaf in the regular coffee pot? Now that’s just evil taken a step too far.

To the person putting decaf coffee into the 'regular' coffee pot: I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you stop putting decaf into the regular coffee pot now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, and I will find you. - Edin Good Luck!

The decaf’s response:

recent: The British version of the above note

Tags: coffee · Michigan · most popular notes of 2012 · not-so-veiled threats · office

The printer doesn’t appreciate your tone.

February 8th, 2012 · 28 Comments

If only there were a simple solution to this problem…

PRINTER OUT OF TONER Please use another Printer that has Toner. Because this one doesn't. Don't bother complaining. There are other Printers with Toner.  The Splash one is rarely used nowadays. It's lonely. It has excess toner. This message is a waste of toner. PROCRASTINATION.

related: PC Load Letter?!

Tags: Houston · most popular notes of 2012 · office · the printer

Signed, The Doorman Freezing His Ass Off

January 25th, 2012 · 33 Comments

Thanks to Kenny from San Francisco for introducing me to the work of my new favorite doorman.

Many light years away a new planet much like each has been discovered; one where they use revolving doors.

related: “Church Sign Writer” is a real job

Tags: actually totally reasonable · office

Hey, I was saving that for later!

January 22nd, 2012 · 17 Comments

…because if you are saving the contents of your nose for an afternoon snack, feel free to use to office walls for that purpose!

Are you saving these for an afternoon snack? If not, please use a tissue.

related: The bathroom-stall booger epidemic

Tags: Canada · hygiene · nose-picking · office

It’s not a chore; it’s a date!

January 16th, 2012 · 19 Comments

Spotted by Kathy at her office lunchroom in Seattle:

1: Hate to state the obvious...But-Your Mother doesn't work here...Please clean up after yourselves 2: Mom never really did much cleaning. She was kind of a drunk. 3: it shows...

The real sad reality?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqDzKad2Q3M

 

related: You sure nag like my mother…

Tags: cleaning · office · rebuttals · Seattle · smartass · Your mother doesn't...

Short on New Year’s resolutions? The janitor has a few suggestions for you.

December 30th, 2011 · 39 Comments

From the ladies’ room…

New Year's Resolution: I WILL FLUSH THE TOILET AS MANY TIMES AS IT TAKES TO MAKE MY CRAP DISAPPEAR.

And the men’s room…

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS:  *I will not pee on the floor *I will not pee on the toilet seats *I will not throw paper towels on the floor (either inside or outside the restroom) *I will not leave paper towels (or pieces of them) on the counter

And the men’s room, one day later…

FIXED THAT FOR YOU

related: And a Happy New Year to you!

Tags: bodily fluids · hygiene · office · toilet

Welcome to “Real America”

November 17th, 2011 · 123 Comments

Reports Barb in Las Vegas: “A woman in our office, originally from the Philippines, just got her citizenship. Our often inappropriate receptionist wrote this note on her card.”

Congrats on being a 'real American' now! No more climbing over barbed wire in the nite!

Yes, that really does say “no more climbing over barbed wire in the nite.” Adds Barb: “She also printed lyrics from West Side Story in giant font and hung them in the area where we had celebratory cake. So odd!”

I like to be in America! OK by me in America! Ev'rythin free in America. For a small fee in America!

related: America the not-so-beautiful

Tags: Comic Sans Alert · Las Vegas · misplaced patriotism · office · oh no you didn't · WTF?