Entries Tagged as 'office'
Found on the company dishwasher by Pete M….
The text at the bottom reads: “If you would like a lesson in telling the difference between the machine being on or not, please see reception.” ) Now that’s a Power Point presentation I’d love to see.
related: The needy little dishwasher
Tags: CAPS LOCK · confusion??? · dishwasher · office · opening/closing
from the offices of “a large internet company” in northern virginia…thanks to liz for submitting!
Tags: bathroom · group bitchfest · office · smiley · toilet · Virginia
This important safety message is brought to you from an anonymous worker at a call center in Toronto.
Tags: attire · danger · e-mail · kitchen · office · spelling and grammar police · Toronto
(Charlie in Los Angeles did not eat your lunch.)
Tags: excessive underlining · group bitchfest · Los Angeles · office · office fridge · smartass · smiley · spelling and grammar police · stealing
Tags: moving/not moving · office · unnecessary "quotation marks"
Oh, how I love (totally tacky) reply-all e-mails.
Thanks to submitter Kate in New York City — who says she has a whole inbox full of e-mails like this from the coworkers at her law firm.
Tags: all-staff e-mail · e-mail · etiquette · food · holiday spirit · office · stealing
Explains JDB: “The blue note went up first, then we hired a bunch of contractors. The red note went up shortly after that.”
Tags: cleaning · coffee · exclamation-point happy!!!! · office
Maybe it’s the manic use of ellipses and exclamation points, but this note makes me extremely uncomfortable.
Says submitter Erica in New York City, “As bad as it can get in the ladies’, I’ve been told the men’s bathroom is even worse.”
Tags: "helpful" advice · bathroom · bullet points · Comic Sans Alert · ellipses-crazed · exclamation-point happy!!!! · hygiene · New York · office · spelling and grammar police · toilet
(from an anonymous submitter in Maryland.)
Tags: "helpful" advice · exclamation-point happy!!!! · illness · kitchen · Maryland · office · spelling and grammar police
In 2001, I solved a “disappearing food” problem without these little notes. For some time (3 weeks or so), I bought some very nice food, put my name on it with a “do not touch — not for human consumption!” sign, and watched it disappear. I also found out about the fine taste of the thief – sugar was high in the rank. So on a random day, I placed a box of very nice sugar treats with the same sign, in the same place, and — as expected — it disappeared pretty soon. That was 9-10AM. By 2PM, the horse laxative I put in the food made two co-workers abandon the office in a hurry, only to spend the next 24 to 48 hours in the hospital.
Nothing was ever said (it could lead to lawsuit). If needed, I would claim the treats where for my horses, and “not for human consumption” — notice a similarity? I immediately stopped eating the food I left behind, just in case they thought of doing the same. Somehow, food never disappeared again. Next time I would use ink — permanent ink — just in case the idiots choose the lawsuit option.
Back in the day when I worked at a public library somebody stole my Hot Pockets. I responded by writing this passive-aggressive haiku (or something similar, I can’t recall it exactly) and posting it on the fridge:
Dear Hot Pocket Thief:
I hope that it tastes like guilt,
So hot and delish
The next day there was a note from the Hot Pocket thief who was profuse in his/her apology, as well as two new replacement boxes of hot pockets. I felt really terrible despite it all, and attempt to curb any passive aggressive behavior from myself.
Where I used to work, there was this guy who would drink from anothers guy drink when he left the room. One time he place his drink on a napkin and wrote: “I spit in this”. When he got back somebody else had written “So did I!”
Tags: food · office · office fridge · spitting · stealing · touching