Entries Tagged as 'You call that punctuation?'
Though your attention might have drifted ever so briefly, I’d like to reassure you that the ongoing debate over which restrooms (men’s or women’s) are the foulest continues to rage on — and yes, it’s as nauseating as ever!
I literally received these two submissions — the first from an EMT school in Massachusetts, the second from a non-profit in D.C. — within minutes of each other. Mere coincidence? Or a cosmic clue from the Internet gods that it was time for a showdown between “Angulated Rectum Guy” and “The Queen of Diahrriah?” Okay, that was a gimme. The real question: who would you rather share a loo with?
Exhibit A) as witnessed by Josh in Fall River, Mass.
Exhibit B) From an anonymous bystander in College Park, Maryland
related: And you thought college students were foul…
Tags: bathroom · bold-underlined-caps · D.C. · ellipses-crazed · exclamation-point happy!!!! · Massachusetts · obnoxious definition · office · shit · spelling and grammar police · that's disgusting · toilet
If you’d like to join a vigilante punctuation posse or a grassroots typography militia, Washington State might be the place for you.
In one Seattle suburb, for example, an underground group has targeted a certain “JS,” who sources say “has some serious control/micromanagement issues, and enjoys flaunting his power to tell people what to do a liiiittle too much. He also tends to find nasty ways to get revenge on people who contradict him.”
Elsewhere in Seattle, “office professionalism” seems to have no bearing on freedom of speech…as long as you use the right typeface, of course.
related: Completely valid rebuttals
Tags: "too inside fucking baseball" · apostrophe catastrophe · awk abbrev · Comic Sans Alert · Helsinki · most popular notes of 2010 · music · not-so-veiled threats
From South Africa, a non-passive-aggressive weekend bonus note!
I wouldn’t be surprised if this sign — from Cheetah rehab center near Capetown — was only posted after the recent demise of some hapless Darwin Award candidate. (One who thought blasting one of the most irritating sounds on earth in the face of a large predatory cat was a good idea.)
Tags: actually totally reasonable · animal welfare · apostrophe catastrophe · noise · South Africa
Chris found this not-so-nice note in the laundry room of his nice townhouse complex. What’s interesting here is how the author seems to undermine his or her own logic. (As Chris put it, “I know it’s really pathetic to steal a dryer sheet and a quarter, but really, is it that big of a deal?”)
If it’s not about the 25 cents, but rather, the principle of the thing, well…which is worse? To take a quarter from an empty laundry room, knowing that one of your neighbors left it there? Or to post a dick-ish anonymous note for all to see…instead of, say, keeping your damn quarters in your pocket like everybody else?
related: I know where you live, laundry thief
Tags: ellipses-crazed · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · grow up · I know who you are · karma's a bitch · laundry · message to all intended for one · money · neighbors · stealing · Tucson
“I found this posted on every vertical object within a block radius around Adam’s Point in Oakland,” says submitter JasonP. (I particularly enjoy point #4 of the response.)
Meanwhile, a set of neighbors in Vancouver, B.C. were tussling over a similar case of mistaken identity.
related: I’m not creepy, in fact…I’m quite gay.
extra credit: “But he was dressed like a ‘gang person,’ you guys!”
Tags: "helpful" advice · CAPS LOCK · exclamation-point happy!!!! · graffiti · mistaken identity · neighbors · noise · Oakland · Oops? · rebuttals · Vancouver · vandalism
Our submitter in Amherst, Massachusetts was heading to class at UMass one day when she saw no fewer than twelve of these signs posted throughout the hallways and doors of her apartment building. “My neighbors had a fun time responding with comments all over them,” she says, at least for the day and half before they got taken down.
I think my favorite part of this one is the handwritten notes at the bottom. One neighbor suggests, “Perhaps you should talk to the people in this building instead of making them think you’re mean, dramatic and cowardly,” and the writer, pouty-faced, responds, “Well I have said this before and nobody listens.” (Unwritten response: “Boo-FUCKING-hoo. Sounds like somebody needs to get laid.” )
related: When parking gets political
Tags: bold underlined italics · car · exclamation-point happy!!!! · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · jealous much? · Massachusetts · neighbors · parking · rebuttals
I’m sure these ladies thank their lucky stars every day that they have each other as roommates. Wouldn’t you?
related: Your trash stinks. Grow up, thanks.
Tags: apostrophe abuse · college life · garbage · mean girls · Orlando · roommates · that's disgusting · whiteboard
Mandie in Sullivan, Illinois found this love note from her six-year-old daughter tucked under her pillow one night. Can we get this kid on a stamp, stat? I think she has a future at Hallmark (or someecards).
Perhaps she could work on getting this prototype (by six-year-old Max in Marietta, Georgia) into production.
related: The joys of motherhood
Tags: exclamation-point happy!!!! · Georgia · Illinois · kids · Moms & Dads
Our submitter and his wife in Loveland, Colorado used to work the night shift together, and they’d generally get home around 3 or 4 in the morning. “We did try our best to keep quiet,” our submitter says…but apparently their best wasn’t good enough for one of their neighbors. They never actually met this particular neighbor, but they did find this note on their door one night.
This note appears to be the work of the a non-native English speaker, so it’s not the grammar here that I’d like to draw attention to. Actually, what impressed me is what a perfectly clear picture this note paints of the writer’s mental state. ”I CAN HEAR YOU IN MY MIND!!!!!!” — complete with the six trailing exclamation points — does that not just say it all?
related: euphemisms of disturb
Tags: Colorado · exclamation-point happy!!!! · neighbors · noise · spelling and grammar police · to/too
Emily in Richmond, Virginia says this note was recently posted in her apartment building, “right next to a note complaining about a) the tenants in the building that have parties and don’t clean up the beer that gets left in the hallways and b) the laziness of the dog owners in the building that don’t pick up their dogs’ poop.”
related: Wanna touch the baby?
Tags: exclamation-point happy!!!! · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · kids · more aggressive than passive · most popular notes of 2010 · neighbors · noise · Richmond · spelling and grammar police