Entries Tagged as 'you know who you are'

So…the water cooler’s hosting rainbow parties again?

May 13th, 2009 · 155 Comments

Spotted above the office “water cooler” by “Josh” in Boston…

I can't believe the amount of 'pink' lipstick that was removed from the water spout. Please be more considerate of others. You know who you are!

related: And all the pieces matter

Tags: Boston · office · unnecessary "quotation marks" · water · you know who you are

Neighborhood crazy-watch

March 6th, 2009 · 75 Comments

Our anonymous submitter in Quebec says this note is posted on the door of an apartment in her building. “Looks like somebody had a rough breakup,” she speculates…in which case I think dude is probably better off.

Still, I think the ambiguity here presents a wealth of other possible scenarios, no?

You know who you are. THIS IS A REMINDER that just because you have a key it doesn't mean you can enter my apt!

related: and all the pieces matter

Tags: Canada · crazypants · ex drama · neighbors · you know who you are

And all the pieces matter

October 28th, 2008 · 88 Comments

“If it wasn’t for the handwriting,” says Lauren in California, “I would have guessed my mom wrote it.”

Meanwhile, Carson in Valencia found this note (crudely laminated with packing tape) attached to a tree while walking his dog in the park. “Maybe next time Maggie will think twice about leaving her ceramic cats unattended,” he says.

And in Seattle…

Hey! Those pots were not FREE! give them back!

“In the pot-snatcher’s defense, people leave furniture and the like on the street all over this area of town as acts of charity, so it definitely would have been an easy mistake for anyone to make,” Josef says, adding: “When I took this picture, the homeowner was glaring at me from the garage the whole time. Bad vibes, man.”

related: Neighborhood Crazy-Watch

Tags: apostrophe abuse · California · CAPS LOCK · comma diarrhea · emdash overboard · garbage · neighbors · rhetorical question · Seattle · You call that punctuation? · you know who you are

I am seriously like gonna hyperventilate and die, and it will be your fault

October 21st, 2008 · 162 Comments

Earlier this year, Emma in California was sharing a kitchen with three other girls. one day, out of the blue, one of her roommates posted this note. (Warning: prepare to reexamine any preconceptions you may have about Mormons, straight-edgers, and college-aged women in general.)

untitled 06.17.08 2

By the next morning, Wmma says, the note was promptly defaced, but Pam didn’t respond until about a week or so later, when she announced she was moving out. Apparently, she was saving it all up for her final missive. (Side note to God: While Pam may have a filthy mouth, she did censor herself from taking your name in vain!)

i am seriously like gonna hyperventilate and die, and it will be your fault

related: Losing lisa

extra credit: summer heights high [youtube]

Tags: cleaning · college life · God · mean girls · roommates · saga · sex sex sex · signed with love · thanks (but not really) · you know who you are

But now I’m gold (hooray hooray)

October 14th, 2008 · 60 Comments

Meg’s uncanny curatorial ability to uncover the silver lining in any situation was woefully under-appreciated at her last job, but even her former coworkers had to admit that this farewell e-mail was an impressive excavation of meg’s latent passive-aggressive tendencies.

Hi all, Due to Museum restructuring, my position has been terminated today. After seeing five other staff members voluntary departures from the Museum recently. I know this change is a step in the right direction for me. On to bigger, better galleries and museums with organized management and high-paying salaries!!! It has been a pleasure working with some of you more than other (you know who you are)! Cheers, Meg

Hi all, Due to Museum restructuring, my position has been terminated today. After seeing five other staff members voluntary departures from the Museum recently. I know this change is a step in the right direction for me. On to bigger, better galleries and museums with organized management and high-paying salaries!!! It has been a pleasure working with some of you more than others (you know who you are)! Cheers, Meg

related: This shit is bananas

Tags: all-staff e-mail · cheers · farewell letter · fired · you know who you are

Bleak House

July 31st, 2008 · 219 Comments

“A few years back I was living in a halfway house in Canberra where theft from the communal kitchen was a common problem,” writes Alex in Australia. “One morning we woke to discover that the fridge had gone missing.” (The coffee in question was stolen from a cupboard, but apparently the owner thought removing the fridge was the best form of attack.)

STEAL MY COFFEE!! NO MORE. NO FRIDGE UNTIL I AM COMPENSATED $3.00 SUNDAY, 8-8-04 U KNOW WHO YOU ARE

The fridge incident went unresolved for many months, Alex says, because none of the residents could be bothered to move it back inside…and nobody had $3 to spare. In fact, he says, no one ever seemed all too concerned about the whole thing, explaining, “because we spent most of our money on vice, we had no food to put in the fridge anyway.”

Eventually (long afterAlex moved out) the fridge was declared a traffic hazard, and a charity took it away.

related: Um, Rene Hall?

Tags: actions speak louder · Australia · Canberra · CAPS LOCK · fridge · money · questionable logic · roommates · stealing · You call that punctuation? · you know who you are

Maybe “no teenagers” would have been simpler

June 2nd, 2008 · 142 Comments

Our anonymous submitter spotted this signage at a homemade water park somewhere near Cherry Point, South Carolina.

pool rules

pool rules

related: And pull up your pants

Tags: crazypants · sex sex sex · South Carolina · spelling and grammar police · swimming pool · unnecessary "quotation marks" · you know who you are

Thou shalt honor thy Facebook newsfeed, and keep it holy

May 29th, 2008 · 98 Comments

A certain Facebook friend of our anonymous submitter seems to have been going through a rough couple of weeks. but, hey, at least she seems to be confronting her issues!

[Redacted] is fed up with the people who like to feed on gossip and like to spread rumors about stuff that isn't true...stop doing it! You all definitely know who you are.

The repulsion I have for the one habitually lying person who feed on other peoples "drama" shall not bear false witness on me....read the 9th commandment.

[Redacted] still has repulsion for a certain male...what a no good hypocrite!

(Confidential to Facebook friend: I’m no shrink, but I have a feeling this strategy might be more effective if the method of confrontation was something other than a status-update blind item on Facebook. just a thought!)

related: So obsessed that I’m becoming a bore

Tags: Facebook · God · you know who you are

There you go, bringing Him into it again

June 4th, 2007 · 38 Comments

What Would Jesus Steal?

Jesus doesn't steal Poptarts. NEITHER SHOULD YOU...

Jesus didn't steal hot wings & Pizza rolls Neither should you!! JJ + Destiny

This classroom is covered by the blood of Jesus. You deal with Him when you steal from children!

(Thanks to Sarah at Greenville College (a Christian school in Illinois) and  James in Beaumont, Texas for their submissions.)

related: Would Jesus steal jelly?

Tags: college life · excessive underlining · food · Illinois · Jesus · stealing · you know who you are