The spoon may lack the aggressive physique of its more acute brethren, the knife and fork, but make no mistake: it is the passive-aggressive utensil of choice.
Why else would these spoons, spotted by Melissa at her office in Harlingen, Texas, be assuming a leadership position among this group of discontented silverware? We received word of this neglect on December 3, and can only speculate as to how furious the spoons were forced to become before getting the attention they deserve.
This kind of spoon-related standoff is hardly an isolated occurence, however…as Garett witnessed with this bulletin board display of spoon-napping from the local community center.
related post: the silverware segregationist
FILED UNDER: "accidental" "borrowing" · office · spoons · visual aids
“There’s a lot of foot traffic at a certain computer lab at our university,” says our submitter in Ypsilanti, Michigan, “but it can only seat 30 at a time.”
In order to (in theory) alleviate the problem, and in practice, to give waiting students some new clip art to focus their rage upon, the university posted this sign on the door of the lab…to which several students added their own clarifications.
Really, though: which is a better simulation of post-college working life for the major of university graduates: writing a paper on themes of alienation in James Joyce…or periods of mind-numbing boredom punctuated by the furtive checking of status updates and the throwing of virtual snowballs? Mmm?
related: Making time for the important things in life…like Facebook apps
FILED UNDER: actually totally reasonable · clip art catastrophe · college life · Facebook · im-speak · rebuttals
Our defendant, Lee in Austin, was just finishing off a travel-sized toothpaste from a recent business trip when Lee’s roommate — apparently oblivious to this small change in routine — became convinced that Lee was mooching off her tube of Advance White.
“My roommate told my boyfriend that she had left me ‘a note,’ and about a week later he asked me if I had seen it. I had not, because, in fact, I had never touched her damn toothpaste. But now, every time I reach for my toothpaste, I see this.”
And by the way, adds Lee, “She [said roommate] is currently out of shampoo.”
related: Oh, please. Do I look like someone who uses drugstore shampoo?
FILED UNDER: Austin · hygiene · meta · roommates · sharing is caring
To Washington, D.C….
…it seems like one thing everyone can agree on is the total obsolescence of print media.
related: Love, apt. #3
FILED UNDER: Australia · Canberra · D.C. · newspaper · pleasantries as afterthought
Apparently, sayeth google analytics, the oh-so-clever phrase “if you sprinkle when you tinkle” is one of the most common search terms that leads people to this little website. (Sorry to disappoint you, folks — no cross-stitch patterns to be found here.)
So, um, yeah…I’m gonna go curl up the fetal position and die now. I’ll leave the textual analysis underlying the great “neat/sweetie” literary schism to you guys, k?
This one might be a little more home-spun, but I think the urine-colored highlighter and ellipses diarrhea really pushes it over the top:
If you want your mind completely blown, check out this international variation, from Jamaica:
And from San Francisco, the po-mo edition:
related: “Unattended children will be given espresso and a free puppy”
FILED UNDER: bathroom · CAPS LOCK · ellipses-crazed · high on highlighter · pure poetry · toilet
Spotted in the basement of a New Jersey church where people play bingo all the time. Adds submitter Yamis: “I guess we know the demographics of the crowd.”
related: More like hardly working
FILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · New Jersey · old folks · spelling and grammar police · temperature · your/you're
The icing on top here, says our submitter, is the second comment — the one from Billy. Why? Because, well, that’s the guy Slade just broke up with.
Adds our submitter: “Awkward pretty much sums it up.”
related: please pick up your dirty laundry asap
FILED UNDER: breakup · ex drama · Facebook · most popular notes of 2008 · oh no you didn't
Jen says this liquor store in Chicago’s Lincoln Square is completely plastered with notes like these, but — vexingly enough — the guy at the register was such a hawk she was only able to snap a few photos. Happily, I’d say Jen scored a hat trick for insolence with these three.
related: Free markets, free people, free papers
FILED UNDER: blitzkrieg approach · cell phone · Chicago · irregular capitalization · obnoxious definition
I hereby declare the writer of the second note in this exchange (from a college art studio in Texas) the winner of the season’s official “oh, snap!” award.
(Sure, the original note-writer might have a case — but just like those pesky BCS rankings, style points count, baby!)
related: i before e except after c ftw
FILED UNDER: art · Austin · college life · garbage · oh snap · Texas
How’d you like to be flatmates with Dianne in London? Cos I’m thinking there just might be an opening soon…
related: clarifying motion #2
FILED UNDER: bathroom · drizzunk · hygiene · London · roommates · spitting · U.K.