Pain (and disgust) at the pump

June 11th, 2008 · 116 comments

Just in case gas prices aren’t hurting you enough lately, Tim from Madison, Wisconsin brings us this stomach-turning (yet impressively restrained) note from a petrol station somewhere en route to Green Bay.

Magazines must be purchased before entering the restroom. Thank You

Meanwhile, Tonya in Oakland passes along a photo taken by a traveler brave/desperate enough to actual enter a gas station restroom somewhere in Utah.

ATTENTION Bathrooms are FREE for your use if you feel the NEED to COMPLAIN about cleanliness the cleaning supplies are INSIDE!

And finally, the kicker, from Jim in Columbia, S.C. —  who would’ve guessed that germaphobia and gas-station employment aren’t mutually exclusive?

POSTED IF YOU HAVE FLU KEEP YOUR ASS OUT!

related: “If it wasn’t for the toilet, there would be no books”

→ 116 CommentsFILED UNDER: "customer service" · Columbia · excessive underlining · gas station · germaphobia · South Carolina · toilet · Wisconsin


Oh sweetie, I love it when you talk dirty!

June 10th, 2008 · 150 comments

“My friend Katelyn’s roommate left her this note before she went away for Memorial Day weekend last year,” says Monica in Boston. “I love how it starts off so BFF-like…then takes a sharp left into passive-aggressive territory.”

oh sweetie, i love it when you talk dirty!

Adds Monica: “While Katelyn normally likes to avoid confrontation, I think this note pushed her over the edge. She didn’t empty the trash or rinse a dish the entire weekend, and they spent the next three months before their lease ended in a passive-aggressive standoff (purposely being loud when they knew the other had to study…’accidentally’ breaking the other’s belongings, etc.) Good times!”

related: (They match the plastic slipcover on the futon)

→ 150 CommentsFILED UNDER: cleaning · college life · dishes · heart · mean girls · p.s. · roommates · smiley


Next on thieves with low self-esteem…

June 9th, 2008 · 141 comments

Terri in D.C. found this sign-bedecked scooter outside her apartment hilarious for three reasons. First off, “the fact that one of those little squirrely-looking scooter guys got out his most aggressive art supply and wrote ‘fuck off and die’ to a stranger.”

Second, she says: “I live between two churches, a library, an elementary school, and a high school. Classy place to curse at passersby!” And the best part, says Terri? “The neighborhood I live in in D.C. is named Mount Pleasant.”

YOU ARE A TERRIBLE THIEF...YOU HAVE FAILED YOURSELF LOSER!!!

Who knew scooter owners had such filthy mouths? 2

Who knew scooter owners had such filthy mouths? 4

Either steal it or leave it the fuck alone DON'T BE A BITCH -Owner

related: Nice try

→ 141 CommentsFILED UNDER: blitzkrieg approach · D.C. · die bitch die · irregular capitalization · questionable logic · scooters & mopeds · stealing


A little bit of psycho-therapy

June 8th, 2008 · 66 comments

“This is from my shrink’s office,” explains our anonymous submitter in Wisconsin. “Ironically, I was going to them to help me resolve issues with my spouse’s passive-aggressive tendencies.”

Since we really hate working for free, please notify your psychologist of any changes in insurance coverage for 2008 THANK YOU

Can’t you just feel the repressed anger in the sudden drop-off in punctuation?  (After all, if you’re not gonna use three exclamation points, why bother?)

related: perhaps it’s time for a little group therapy?

→ 66 CommentsFILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · money · shrinks · Wisconsin · You call that punctuation?


The audacity of theft

June 6th, 2008 · 152 comments

Writes an anonymous submitter in Houston: “A neighbor in my building put up an Obama yard sign on the door of her apartment around the time of the Texas primary. When it disappeared, I assumed she took it down herself.”

Then up went this note — a cheerful bit of propaganda that oh-so-subtly disproves all those ugly stereotypes about “self-righteous Obama supporters” with a colorful blaze of moralistic tsk-tsking and First-Amendment flag-waving. (Woo! Obama ’08!)

To the not so neighborly Republican or Hillary support who STOLE my Obama sign: PLEASE return it. Although I am unable to locate a stipulation in the lease that prevents the expresion [sic] of my first amendment rights, I would be more than happy to display the sign inside my apartment rather than on the door. However, STEALING is not only illegal, it's downright tacky. Just put it outside my door and I'll take it inside. THANKS! OBAMA '08!

related: A little bit of shameless gloating

→ 152 CommentsFILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · Houston · neighbors · politics · rainbow-colored · spelling and grammar police · stealing · that's illegal


You might want to take a hard look at your washcloth.

June 5th, 2008 · 145 comments

An anonymous submitter in Portland, Maine is currently chafing under one of the most common irritants of communal living: a roommate “who has never once bought toilet paper.”

She and her other roommate tried some of the more subtle manuevers in the passive-aggressive playbook — up to and including the ol’ hide-and-carry — to no avail. (“When we run out, he uses our paper towels instead,” she says.) That is, until her roommate, who’d “had enough of plunging his shit,” decided to up the ante with this note.

ATTN: Due to Dave's continuous mooching, inexplicably high toilet paper usage, and inability to unclog the toilet, I am officially removing all tissue + paper products from the bathroom + surrounding areas. From now own you will have to BRING YOUR OWN TOILET PAPER.  Apologies. If you have any problems you can contact Dave. xoxo, Maxime

related: oh, she said it

→ 145 CommentsFILED UNDER: all clogged up · bathroom · Maine · paper product fairy · rainbow-colored · roommates · shit · toilet · toilet paper · xoxo


We all need somebody to hate on

June 4th, 2008 · 152 comments

“Working in a university library, you get used to a lot of ‘quirky’ personalities,” says our anonymous submitter in Manhattan, Kansas. “So far, this is the only one that has decided to put pathology to paper.”

we all need somebody to hate on

→ 152 CommentsFILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · college life · exclamation-point happy!!!! · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · Kansas · nonsensical spacing · touching


A matter of taste

June 2nd, 2008 · 203 comments

Christine in San Rafael, California says Sol Food is “literally the best thing about San Rafael.” One reason, she says? The restaurant “keeps this gem of a note right where it belongs — on display in the glass cabinet outside the front door, where most restaurants would keep a menu.”

Seeing as the note has been up for about a year and half so far, it seems Angelo’s threat hasn’t caused much concern. In fact, Christine says, “the place is so popular that it always has a line out the door, which (bonus!) allows me to read it over and over again.”

a matter of taste

(See the lime-green exterior for yourself here and here.)

related: Wrath mat

→ 203 CommentsFILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · a matter of taste · Bay Area · California · Marin · not-so-veiled threats · oh no you didn't · Puerto Rico · restaurant · San Rafael


Maybe “no teenagers” would have been simpler

June 2nd, 2008 · 142 comments

Our anonymous submitter spotted this signage at a homemade water park somewhere near Cherry Point, South Carolina.

pool rules

pool rules

related: And pull up your pants

→ 142 CommentsFILED UNDER: crazypants · sex sex sex · South Carolina · spelling and grammar police · swimming pool · unnecessary "quotation marks" · you know who you are


Thou shalt honor thy Facebook newsfeed, and keep it holy

May 29th, 2008 · 98 comments

A certain Facebook friend of our anonymous submitter seems to have been going through a rough couple of weeks. but, hey, at least she seems to be confronting her issues!

[Redacted] is fed up with the people who like to feed on gossip and like to spread rumors about stuff that isn't true...stop doing it! You all definitely know who you are.

The repulsion I have for the one habitually lying person who feed on other peoples "drama" shall not bear false witness on me....read the 9th commandment.

[Redacted] still has repulsion for a certain male...what a no good hypocrite!

(Confidential to Facebook friend: I’m no shrink, but I have a feeling this strategy might be more effective if the method of confrontation was something other than a status-update blind item on Facebook. just a thought!)

related: So obsessed that I’m becoming a bore

→ 98 CommentsFILED UNDER: Facebook · God · you know who you are