Omar says he found this tucked underneath the windshield his car in Noe Valley, a neighborhood of San Francisco “inhabited by self-centered jackasses — myself included, if you believe this note.”
Adds Omar: “I should clarify: The author of this masterpiece is talking about residential street parking, not a private/public lot with clearly designated lines or, for that matter, even metered street parking. I like to think of myself as a fairly considerate person; clearly I’m nowhere near considerate enough.” (Not by Northern Californian standards, at least.)
related: The parking class
FILED UNDER: Bay Area · California · parking · San Francisco
Nicole in Australia says this note was left anonymously on her coworker’s computer. “We work in a fairly small office and no one will own up to putting the note there,” she says…not that they necessarily disagree with the sentiment.
Think about it, though. Which is worse: the click-click-click of long fingernails on a keyboard, or the snip-snip of a coworker clipping his nails on company time?
related: At least it wasn’t “grand valse”
FILED UNDER: Australia · noise · office · on behalf of everyone
Tom from Cambridge, England spotted this notice posted in “the tiniest little toilet in my college hall” — so tiny, he says, there’s “barely enough room to fit a dog in there if you tried.” (But a few raw steaks? Perhaps!)
(Massive Canine Infestation: sharing the stage with The Light Brown Apple Moth Debacle at a Warped Tour show near you!)
related: So many questions
FILED UNDER: bathroom · CAPS LOCK · college life · food · fun with malapropisms · Say wha? · toilet · U.K. · vermin · WTF?
Writes Michael in Milton Keynes, England: “I have an ex-service ambulance which I use as a van. I had parked it on the road round the corner from me for a couple of weeks, and after two days I got a call from the town council’s abandoned vehicle unit. Then I got a few calls from the police. Today, when I decided to move it, I found this note on the window. I was almost tempted to buy something and abandon it there for real now…but that would be bad, wouldn’t it?”
related: But He took the wheel
FILED UNDER: "polite notice" · parking · there goes the neighborhood · U.K.
An anonymous submitter in Ann Arbor, Michigan received this e-mail from a guy who just moved into her co-op (“basically a co-ed frat house”) for the rest of the summer. “We’ve tried to reason with him,” she says, to no avail. “When asked why he has to get up so early, he says, ‘I have important things to do in the morning,’ and that’s it.”
The even bigger mystery? Wonders our submitter: “Why, if he needs complete silence at night, did he move in with 16 other college kids on summer break?”
related: there will come soft pains
FILED UNDER: and that's an order · college life · drizzunk · e-mail · Michigan · noise · questionable logic · roommates · sleeping · spelling and grammar police · thanks (but not really)
“A few years back I was living in a halfway house in Canberra where theft from the communal kitchen was a common problem,” writes Alex in Australia. “One morning we woke to discover that the fridge had gone missing.” (The coffee in question was stolen from a cupboard, but apparently the owner thought removing the fridge was the best form of attack.)
The fridge incident went unresolved for many months, Alex says, because none of the residents could be bothered to move it back inside…and nobody had $3 to spare. In fact, he says, no one ever seemed all too concerned about the whole thing, explaining, “because we spent most of our money on vice, we had no food to put in the fridge anyway.”
Eventually (long afterAlex moved out) the fridge was declared a traffic hazard, and a charity took it away.
related: Um, Rene Hall?
FILED UNDER: actions speak louder · Australia · Canberra · CAPS LOCK · fridge · money · questionable logic · roommates · stealing · You call that punctuation? · you know who you are
This note from a “friendly neighbor” was put through the mailslot of Dan’s apartment in the heart of South Philly. Says Dan: “I wanted to put ‘thanks for the advice!’ on the door in response, but thought better of it.”
As infuriating as the note was, “I do love how they phoned in the underlining on ‘of’ and ‘the,’ then went to town with ‘curb,’” Dan says. “Thank you, friendly neighbor, for the best piece of bulletin board material I’ve ever gotten.”
related: Two birds with one snowman
FILED UNDER: excessive underlining · garbage · gloriously redundant · neighbors · Philadelphia
First, the “tell” part: I know it’s ridiculous, but I still have a mini existential crisis every time a friend/colleague/family member forwards me a passive-aggressive-themed article or cartoon along with a remark like “this made me think of you!”or “hey, passive-aggressive girl!” (I comfort myself with the thought that hey, at least I didn’t decide to go with a more “technically accurate” site name like notesfromcrazyassholesanduptightbitches.com.)
Now, for the show: on Monday, Jon Stewart uttered a phrase I’ve heard from visitors to this site on, oh, let’s say more than one occasion. Meanwhile, this is the second week in a row that the words “passive-aggressive” have featured prominently in The New Yorker. here’s this week’s:
Of course, this is well-trodden territory for the most excellent web comic Toothpaste for Dinner. Last week, several discerning readers pointed me toward the latest:
If you take a spin through the Toothpaste for Dinner archives, you’ll find even more familiar themes. Here’s a sampling:
And of course, xkcd never disappoints.
Thanks to Kate and Ellen in New York, Diane and Mary in Chicago, Lisa in Minnesota, Segat in the U.K., and Zack M. for sending these our way!
extra credit: The New Yorker anti-caption contest [radosh.net]
FILED UNDER: meta
In terms of the appropriate sympathetic nervous system response, an e-mail subject line like “big favor” is kinda the modern cubicle-dweller’s equivalent of “Saber-tooth tiger outside cave!”
(Note: this e-mail, our Seattle-area submitter says, is from the very same person who brought us this.)
related: Perhaps it’s time for a little group therapy?
FILED UNDER: all-staff e-mail · irregular capitalization · odor · office · oh no you didn't · Seattle · thanks (but not really) · vomit
If you’ve ever tut-tutted over the consequences of big-box stores and online retailers overtaking small businesses, you’ll be heartened to hear that some folks have figured out how to bring those old-fashioned mom-n-pop ideas about customer service into the digital age…with the help of a big ol’ corporation called eBay!
While browsing the auction site for some new shades, my pal Josh stumbled across one such example — a listing from a Florida-based eBayer who goes by the name of whiteblizzard70.
This goes on for several more paragraphs (see for yourself), but I’ll skip to my favorite part — the postscript.
(Josh decided not to bid.)
related: Top five musical crimes perpetrated by record store customers
extra credit: How do you get out of an ebay auction? [consumerist.com]
P.S. This post reminded me of another note my friend Josh told me about a few months back — a piece of reader mail he’d received as an editor at the music mag Blender. Granted, most readers who take the time to write in to magazines like Blender are at least a little bit…off, to say the least. But the last part of this letter — a response to an “Ask Blender” column about the urban legend that Debbie Harry of Blondie was once abducted by Ted Bundy — is genuinely spine-chilling. (Passive-aggressive? Not so much. Creepy? Um, yes.)
FILED UNDER: "customer service" · CAPS LOCK · college life · eBay · Florida · more aggressive than passive · Pompano Beach · spelling and grammar police