I can has guilt trip?

April 2nd, 2008 · 112 comments

Writes Jake in Los Angeles: “At home for Christmas (in Greenville, South Carolina) I mentioned in passing that I would ‘try’ to make it home for Easter, which is what most southern refugee children with guilt complexes tell their doting mothers even though both sides know said child has no intention of showing up to hide eggs and eat ham.”

Jake’s mom, bless her heart, didn’t get the memo.

I am a sad cat wearing bunny ears.

Wish you were coming home but I understand. Love, M

related: Too many

→ 112 CommentsFILED UNDER: guilt trip · holiday spirit · Moms & Dads · South Carolina · southern charm


Facebook schoolyard smackdown

April 1st, 2008 · 105 comments

“Vet school is a sea of studying, testing, drinking and most of all: DRAMA,” reports an anonymous vet-to-be in Ames, Iowa.

Of course, as New York magazine reports this week, Facebook is taking run-of-the-mill classroom sniping to a whole new level of micro-bitchiness. If you have the patience (or the Adderall) to follow it, our submitter gives us a play-by-play of one recent status-update smackdown.

Jessika really wishes people would STOP asking questions at the review sessions, please stop wasting everyone's time because you are dumb!

Vanessa thinks people who think people are dumb should not be in professional school.

Naomi doesn't understand why ppl are upset for others asking questions during a review section. Gee, I wonder what a review section IS for???

You should really think before you "facebook" your thoughts

Vanessa hopes her classmate's future clients get better treatment than their fellow colleagues.

DRAMA IS AWESOME, WE NEED MORE!

related: So obsessed that I’m becoming a bore

→ 105 CommentsFILED UNDER: Facebook · group bitchfest · Iowa · kids today · saga


Maybe you should switch to body wash?

March 31st, 2008 · 89 comments

At least that would make the roommate situation a little less hairy

STOP USING MY BAR OF SOAP IN THE SHOWER!

related: Losing Lisa

→ 89 CommentsFILED UNDER: grow up · hair · hygiene · roommates · San Diego · shower · that's disgusting


A lesson in crime

March 30th, 2008 · 58 comments

Finding funny-haha Engrish signs in Japan is almost too easy, but Biella from New York didn’t settle for cheap laughs during her trip. “Your English is good,” one might say, but this club’s “advisory” about the Tokyo police is pure paranoiac gold.

a lesson in crime

extra credit: Uniformed vigilantes patrol tokyo streets to intimidate slackers [boingboing.net]

→ 58 CommentsFILED UNDER: Clearly a non-native English speaker · exclamation-point happy!!!! · high on highlighter · Tokyo


If you needed an excuse to skip the gym today…

March 28th, 2008 · 99 comments

Well, our anonymous contributor in Pompano Beach, Florida has one for you.

He explains: “I keep a gym membership so that I can feel good about my financial commitment to my health — not so much for the actual health benefits per se. I hadn’t been to the gym in at least two months when I came across this note posted by the showers. (My shower at home was being worked on.) I’m glad I make it a habit to wear sandals in the shower during my quarterly visits.”

ATTENTION   Please refrain from defecating in the shower areas. It is unsanitary and hazardous to the health and well being of our members and staff. Thank you!

related: The Mad Bomber

→ 99 CommentsFILED UNDER: actually totally reasonable · Florida · gym · shit · shower · that's disgusting · that's unsanitary


Really, it’s the Canadian thing to do

March 27th, 2008 · 103 comments

Is posting a “polite” sign for the neighbors passive-aggressive? “Perhaps,” says the Washington Post.

from the washington post's

Perhaps this Portland resident could learn a lesson in politeness from our famously good-natured neighbors to the north? Or, um, maybe not.

(Photos from Guy in toronto, via jerrold!)

related: Boston, a place for friends

→ 103 CommentsFILED UNDER: neighbors · Toronto


What, no bubble letters?

March 26th, 2008 · 98 comments

Cameron in Hyde Park, New York brings us this “maybe not-so-classic dorm dispute: girl meets boy, girl likes boy, boy has girlfriend, girl obsesses over boy, boy’s female neighbors post rejection note from boy to girl, girl…threatens neighbors, artistically.”

MIND YOUR BUSINESS, BITCH!

→ 98 CommentsFILED UNDER: college life · danger · disturbingly detailed · exclamation-point happy!!!! · MYOB · spurned lover


It’s not a race (it’s a social construct)

March 25th, 2008 · 220 comments

Here’s a trio of notes from California that each make me very uncomfortable…and not just because of the painful lack of irony.

First up: an excerpt from seating guidelines posted at the quaint little Mexican restaurant in Huntington Beach where Brynn used to waitress. So quaint, Brynn says, “They also posted a dress code rule that ladies must wear makeup and skirts could not be below the knee.”

Mexican people prefer a booth

Meanwhile, a little farther south, a construction worker left this note for James in San Diego…while he was parked in front of his own house.

TRY MOVING YOUR TRUCK UP SO THAT ANOTHER ONE CAN FIT ASSHOLE! O WAIT YOUR PROBABLY A FUCKIN MEXICAN!

And the last word goes to this bit of social commentary, which Jen spotted on the window of a soon-to-be-opened restaurant in San Francisco.

Speak English (OK, BITE ME XENOPHOBE!)

related: Je comprends…moi non plus

extra credit: ¡Ask a Mexican!® [ocweekly.com]

→ 220 CommentsFILED UNDER: California · casual xenophobia · parking · restaurant · San Diego · your/you're


Help yourself

March 24th, 2008 · 43 comments

Spotted by doppelfrog at London’s Paddington station…

help yourself

related: Water, water everywhere

→ 43 CommentsFILED UNDER: "customer service" · London · rhetorical question · warning · water · whiteboard


I’m pregnant…what’s your excuse?

March 23rd, 2008 · 100 comments

Amanda in Fairhaven, Mass. recently took her sister-in-law in for an ultrasound appointment, and was a little frightened by this sign. (It was posted in three places, both inside and outside the restroom.)

IF YOU ARE HAVING AN ULTRASOUND PLEASE DO NOT EMPTY YOUR BLADDER THIS MEANS YOU!!!

related: Bun — er, pizza in the oven

→ 100 CommentsFILED UNDER: bathroom · exclamation-point happy!!!! · Massachusetts · piss · preggers