Crying over sour milk

January 29th, 2008 · 127 comments

Ashley in Chicago says her roommates are the king and queen of passive-aggressive notes. (“If they ever found this site, they’d think it was a self help group,” she says.) The latest example:

Ashley’s still fuming over this one. “I mean, come on. Just throw it away yourself! You’re probably exerting more energy writing the email and stressing about it,” she says. “And why do you think I’ve been spending so much time at my boyfriend’s anyway?”

→ 127 CommentsFILED UNDER: Chicago · cleaning · fridge · roommates · Would you mind?


Paul Newman: the Franz Ferdinand of the fridge

January 27th, 2008 · 86 comments

This fridge saga (from a Boston-area university lab building) comes to us with a confession on the part of the anonymous submitter: she started it, sort of.

It all began when she discovered that her salad dressing had been mysteriously disposed of. Sad that she had to eat dry lettuce for lunch, she left a note (1) for the black hand responsible “in the least bitchy way I knew how.” She didn’t realize that her soundoff was actually a declaration of war.

There was a warning note for 1 week before it was cleaned.

Adds our submitter: “Needless to say, I think we have all been spending a little too much time in the lab.”

related: Great, your OCD just caused a diabetic coma. Happy?

→ 86 CommentsFILED UNDER: college life · food · fridge · lab rats · Massachusetts · saga · whiteboard


A friendly tip from your waitress

January 24th, 2008 · 278 comments

At the Washington restaurant where Scott works, a customer recently informed one of his coworkers that when she was a waitress back in the day, tips were regarded as a luxury (a sentiment that’s been echoed by many commenters on this site).

Thrilled as she was by this little history lesson, Scott’s coworker decided a little present-day tutorial was only fair. Says Scott: “She retrieved her most recent paycheck (zero dollars and zero cents…in D.C., servers make $2.77 an hour, which all goes to taxes), wrote a little note, and dropped it on the table after they had paid their check.”

Just so you know a tip is a luxury!

related: This is why your server is cranky

→ 278 CommentsFILED UNDER: D.C. · restaurant · tipping


Think ya used enough dynamite there, Butch?

January 23rd, 2008 · 68 comments

But…but…it’s cold out and you’re so close to all the really good gifting suites! Perhaps a Swarovski-crystal-encrusted-organic-sea-kelp loofah would change your mind?

SUNDANCE A-HOLES DO NOT BLOCK THIS DRIVE

(Thanks to Dan M. in Park City, Utah for snapping the photo.)

related: But He took the wheel

→ 68 CommentsFILED UNDER: Park City · parking · Utah


Thou dost protest too much, methinks

January 22nd, 2008 · 66 comments

Writes Joe in Denver: “My roommate gets very emotional when someone criticizes him, but will gladly e-mail me or leave notes around the house with dozens of ‘little reminders’” like this one — written after Joe left a broom in the living room overnight.

Please put it back when you are done : Im not being bitchy or talking down — just making nice!

related: How not to housetrain a roommate

→ 66 CommentsFILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · a little uptight · Denver · smiley


In-game placement would have scored much higher in user engagement

January 21st, 2008 · 62 comments

At the Circuit City in Bradenton, Florida (which I envision something like this) one anonymous employee reports that much of the staff’s downtime is spent obsessively playing Guitar Hero 3 in the store’s breakroom. They even have a 42-inch wall-mounted flatscreen expressly for this purpose. Or at least, they did, until about a month ago.

THE TV WILL RETURN WHEN WE LEARN HOW TO RESPECT OUR BREAKROOM!!!

Our anonymous employee takes umbrage with two issues here. First of all, “there are more than 50 employees who share this room. Does it really look that dirty?” And second, the fact that “instead of reminding us to pick up during any one of our 30 daily meetings, someone actually wasted the time to TAKE PICTURES of the ‘mess’ and hang them in place of the TV. Wouldn’t a simple, ‘hey y’all, clean up your shit?’ have been much, much more efficient?”

What is this “efficiency” of which you speak? It’s certainly not in the retail management handbook!

related: office anthropomorphism

→ 62 CommentsFILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · exclamation-point happy!!!! · Florida · now that's management · retail hell · that's disrespectful · visual aids


Ceci n’est pas une note passif-agressif

January 20th, 2008 · 61 comments

Rachel in Virginia says her two roommates, “despite seeing and talking to me multiple times a day, decide to air their grievances through notes.” These grievances include being responsible for a $200 water bill “because i wash my face and hands at night and in the morning.” rachel has decided that enough is enough.

To paraphrase the Dude paraphrasing Bush Senior: This passive-aggression will not stand, man.

I am not longer accepting passive aggressive notes from people I live with. If you want to complain, talk to me like an adult. Heart, Rachel

Meanwhile, Ben in Helena, Montana says he loves passive-aggressive notes.

In fact, he loves them so much that he had these special sticky notes printed up — both as an homage to our humble projet and “to encourage and facilitate the leaving of such notes.”

Another Passive-Aggressive Note from Ben: Please let me know if you need more work to do! :)

Adds Ben, “They’ve proved so popular I already need to order some more.” (Unclear whether this is a good thing.)

related: “That shit is disrespectful”

→ 61 CommentsFILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · heart · meta · Montana · smiley · Virginia


To the victor goes the bile

January 17th, 2008 · 59 comments

Ruben in Pregon works for an Apple reseller where the managers like to fire up the sales team with little competitions. (iPhones don’t sell themselves, people! For that, you’ll have to hold out for version 2.0.)

When Josh, the store’s very own Dwight Schrute, was pronounced the winner of a recent contest, things unfolded pretty much the way you’d expect.

to the victor goes the bileto the victor goes the bile (part 2)

The only person more universally reviled than the office suckup? the new guy, of course.

Says Ruben: “Most of us are real sticklers for keeping track of new product, but recently we brought on this new guy, Victor, and he hasn’t been doing too well.” Ruben came into work one day to find this MacBook battery on one of the tech benches, along with these notes that explain the entire story in just nine words. (And three question marks.)

to the victor goes the bile

Ruben says this pwnage became less hilarious when Victor actually did end up getting fired. “Awwkard!”

related: Your last day of work was yesterday

→ 59 CommentsFILED UNDER: confusion??? · fired · group bitchfest · office · Oregon · retail hell · whiteboard


It always comes down to the toilet paper.

January 16th, 2008 · 69 comments

Our anonymous submitter received this note after playing host to his friend’s band. In his defense, he says, “the house was not messy.” and, besides, “I never leave him notes when I do normal household chores like emptying the dishwasher and taking the trash out.”

I cleaned the kitchen, emptied the dishwasher, and took out the trash. I would appreciate if you clean my with bathroom which got purely abused by your friends.

Adds our submitter: “Oh, and he can’t count — it was seven guys.” (Quite a Michelle-esque touch, no?)

related: Martyr complex much?

→ 69 CommentsFILED UNDER: band · bathroom · paper product fairy · roommates · that's disgusting · toilet paper


Mad Man

January 15th, 2008 · 92 comments

It was a “killer busy” week at the office, so Gord in Ontario admits that he and his ad-business coworkers left the place in a certain state of disarray. (Such is the wont of “creative professionals.”) Unfortunately, the boss chose that weekend to pop in to give some people an impromptu tour. On Monday, these adorable little thought balloons were posted all around the office.

I don't want anything on the floor again! Ever! Ger this crap off the floor and into an organized area. This is DISGUSTING. You've spilled coffee on MY books.

THIS PLACE IS A FUCKING SHITHOUSE. Boys, this is a man's business - it's an image business, I don't know how far you expect to go with this company but I can tell you right now - I will only associate myself with people who show professional attitude to every phase. If you want to survive you'd better start thinking like business men.

The boss never mentioned the incident again. But rationalizing, it seems, that a sleeping dog is just a dog waiting to be kicked, Gord and his coworkers turned the notes into a T-shirt.

related: Is this what a post-post-feminist looks like?

→ 92 CommentsFILED UNDER: Canada · CAPS LOCK · casual sexism · cleaning · office · Ontario · that's disgusting · that's unprofessional