This is not positive communication

February 6th, 2008 · 78 comments

This series comes to us from an anonymous office worker in Sydney, Australia, who explains: “Despite our multi-million dollar profits, some people in our office are really attached to our company’s bottom line.”

DID YOU REALLY NEED TO PRINT THIS IN COLOUR??

UPDATE: the saga continues!

GET BACK TO WORK. WRITING POST-ITS FOR THIS WALL IS A WASTE OF COMPANY TIME. SHAME ON YOU ALL.

related: Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler

→ 78 CommentsFILED UNDER: money · office supplies · saga · Sydney


Hostile takeover

February 5th, 2008 · 75 comments

A possibly prescient note from the offices of Yahoo! U.K….

hostile takeover

related: just in case you didn’t catch the sarcasm

→ 75 CommentsFILED UNDER: excessive underlining · London · milk · office fridge · stealing · U.K. · Yahoo


You oughta know

February 4th, 2008 · 56 comments

Writes Jaina in Westport, Conn.: “I dated this asshole last fall, and dumped him because I found out that he was using his Livejournal to try to bang girls on the side. I, of course, still spy on him.” Or at least, she did…until her ip address gave her up.

This journal is all locked up. I'm starting something new soon. If you are so curious about me that you check this every day even though the whole journal is locked up, then maybe you should say something. I do have a site meter up that tells me who comes here and from what city, state, or library.

Adds Jaina: “Please note that the entry was posted at 11:45 p.m. on a Friday. I’ll let you draw your own conclusions about the state of his love life.”

Meanwhile, when a passive-aggressive blog posting starts to seem like a relatively direct method of communication, you know things aren’t going to end well.

Dear Jakob, I wish I hadn't found out you left the company you've been with for the last seven years from your blog. Love, Julia

related: Who would’ve thought? It figures

→ 56 CommentsFILED UNDER: blog · Connecticut · ex drama · oh snap


The passively rowdy patriot

February 4th, 2008 · 29 comments

Nicky in Elwood, Indiana (a diehard fan of the Indianapolis Colts) put this sign on her office door last week only to find it defaced by a phantom Pats fan each night after she left. Needless to say, Nicky’s feeling quite vindicated today on behalf of both brothers Manning.

the passively rowdy patriot

tangential: The partly cloudy patriot [wnyc.org]

→ 29 CommentsFILED UNDER: football · office · spelling and grammar police


Roommate fumes; Unilever marketing execs rejoice

February 3rd, 2008 · 66 comments

Curse as much as you want, dude: you’re still bitching about body wash. (Personally, that’s what I’d call a gamekiller.)

Whoever keeps using my fucking shower gel and drinking my fucking beer needs to fucking replace them!!! -Tom

related: I swear this isn’t some sort of stealth viral marketing campaign

→ 66 CommentsFILED UNDER: beer · Brooklyn · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · New York · roommates · stealing · whiteboard


From the Zagat Guide to Threatening Signage

January 31st, 2008 · 88 comments

“Beware,” indeed: Walking along “West 25th or so” in Manhattan, this “work of art” was enough to make Eric “personally” “shit his pants.”

extra credit: The Zagat history of my last relationship [The New Yorker]

→ 88 CommentsFILED UNDER: New York · not-so-veiled threats · unnecessary "quotation marks"


If we give up our exclamation points, the terrorists win!!!

January 30th, 2008 · 62 comments

“The tiny Sioux City, Iowa airport had a jaw-droppingly comprehensive intro to what one could or could not take on board a plane,” reports Timoni from San Francisco, including actual sample-sized bottles of toiletries taped up, show-and-tell style. “The corker, though, was this vehement note near the end (which, yes, had a plastic QUART-SIZE BAG!!!!!!!!! taped underneath).”

You need to separate your QUART SIZE BAG and have it X-RAYED BY IT'S SELF!!!!!!!!!

related: If the TSA was in charge of the office fridge

→ 62 CommentsFILED UNDER: airport · apostrophe abuse · CAPS LOCK · exclamation-point happy!!!! · Sioux City · spelling and grammar police


Crying over sour milk

January 29th, 2008 · 127 comments

Ashley in Chicago says her roommates are the king and queen of passive-aggressive notes. (“If they ever found this site, they’d think it was a self help group,” she says.) The latest example:

Ashley’s still fuming over this one. “I mean, come on. Just throw it away yourself! You’re probably exerting more energy writing the email and stressing about it,” she says. “And why do you think I’ve been spending so much time at my boyfriend’s anyway?”

→ 127 CommentsFILED UNDER: Chicago · cleaning · fridge · roommates · Would you mind?


Paul Newman: the Franz Ferdinand of the fridge

January 27th, 2008 · 86 comments

This fridge saga (from a Boston-area university lab building) comes to us with a confession on the part of the anonymous submitter: she started it, sort of.

It all began when she discovered that her salad dressing had been mysteriously disposed of. Sad that she had to eat dry lettuce for lunch, she left a note (1) for the black hand responsible “in the least bitchy way I knew how.” She didn’t realize that her soundoff was actually a declaration of war.

There was a warning note for 1 week before it was cleaned.

Adds our submitter: “Needless to say, I think we have all been spending a little too much time in the lab.”

related: Great, your OCD just caused a diabetic coma. Happy?

→ 86 CommentsFILED UNDER: college life · food · fridge · lab rats · Massachusetts · saga · whiteboard


A friendly tip from your waitress

January 24th, 2008 · 278 comments

At the Washington restaurant where Scott works, a customer recently informed one of his coworkers that when she was a waitress back in the day, tips were regarded as a luxury (a sentiment that’s been echoed by many commenters on this site).

Thrilled as she was by this little history lesson, Scott’s coworker decided a little present-day tutorial was only fair. Says Scott: “She retrieved her most recent paycheck (zero dollars and zero cents…in D.C., servers make $2.77 an hour, which all goes to taxes), wrote a little note, and dropped it on the table after they had paid their check.”

Just so you know a tip is a luxury!

related: This is why your server is cranky

→ 278 CommentsFILED UNDER: D.C. · restaurant · tipping