Arrivederci, asshole

June 5th, 2007 · 7 comments

Sara is one of seven students sharing an apartment in Venice. After three months of living together, she says, it became clear that one of the flatmates had to go: he had nasty habits like, um, pleasuring himself in his in other people’s bedrooms while they were out.

“We gently told him we thought it was better for everybody if he looked for another house,” Sara says, but he didn’t take the hint. So one of the other roommates decided to leave him this note:

arrivederci, asshole

Roughly translated from the Italian, it reads: “It’s time you leave.”

(He did.)

→ 7 CommentsFILED UNDER: Italiano · Italy · roommates


The souls of our shoes

June 5th, 2007 · 26 comments

This important safety message is brought to you from an anonymous worker at a call center in Toronto.

→ 26 CommentsFILED UNDER: attire · danger · e-mail · kitchen · office · spelling and grammar police · Toronto


Thanks for eating my lunch

June 5th, 2007 · 12 comments

(Charlie in Los Angeles did not eat your lunch.)

PLEASE RETURN CREAMER TO FRIDGE WHEN YOU ARE DONE. [thanks for eating my lunch...AND MINE!] [No problem Guys. Bring some more tomorrow. :) JP

→ 12 CommentsFILED UNDER: excessive underlining · group bitchfest · Los Angeles · office · office fridge · smartass · smiley · spelling and grammar police · stealing


To all tennant

June 5th, 2007 · 17 comments

My personal favorite from Sara’s oh-so-delightful Office Sign Project.

 

→ 17 CommentsFILED UNDER: garbage · neighbors · spelling and grammar police


this is your “last warning”

June 4th, 2007 · 10 comments

imeanthat-1.jpg

a doozy from our pals over at the “blog” of “unnecessary” quotation marks.

→ 10 CommentsFILED UNDER: moving/not moving · office · unnecessary "quotation marks"


The Eleventh Plague

June 4th, 2007 · 7 comments

Oh, how I love (totally tacky) reply-all e-mails.

Will whoever took the entire box of Passover macaroons for him/herself...That box was meant to be for everyone! I brought it in for the office, not for one person. That is totally tacky. Bring it back.

Thanks to submitter Kate in New York City — who says she has a whole inbox full of e-mails like this from the coworkers at her law firm.

→ 7 CommentsFILED UNDER: all-staff e-mail · e-mail · etiquette · food · holiday spirit · office · stealing


Welcome to the office!

June 4th, 2007 · 6 comments

Explains JDB: “The blue note went up first, then we hired a bunch of contractors. The red note went up shortly after that.”

NEW PEOPLE THIS APPLIES TO YOU --> If you drink it - make it! If you spill it - clean it up! If you don't want to do either of the above - USE ANOTHER BREAK ROOM!

→ 6 CommentsFILED UNDER: cleaning · coffee · exclamation-point happy!!!! · office


Danke [for the sarcasm]!!!

June 4th, 2007 · 42 comments

Tim found this note in the basement storeroom of an apartment building in Kiel, Germany:

danke.jpg

Tim’s rough translation:

THANKS for filling [up the storeroom]!!!
I was able to get to the meter just SUPER!!!
tenant 5/1 [fifth floor, first apartment]

[hand written at the bottom] Many thanks from me too, tenant 5/2

→ 42 CommentsFILED UNDER: Deutsche · exclamation-point happy!!!! · neighbors


There you go, bringing Him into it again

June 4th, 2007 · 38 comments

What Would Jesus Steal?

Jesus doesn't steal Poptarts. NEITHER SHOULD YOU...

Jesus didn't steal hot wings & Pizza rolls Neither should you!! JJ + Destiny

This classroom is covered by the blood of Jesus. You deal with Him when you steal from children!

(Thanks to Sarah at Greenville College (a Christian school in Illinois) and  James in Beaumont, Texas for their submissions.)

related: Would Jesus steal jelly?

→ 38 CommentsFILED UNDER: college life · excessive underlining · food · Illinois · Jesus · stealing · you know who you are


The Post-it Wars

June 4th, 2007 · 23 comments

After receiving numerous “helpful tips” from her roommate at the University of Minnesota…

Tips for keeping counters clean!

TIP: If you use the sponge, squeeze it out and put it on the side of the sink. It will last longer and not get stinky! Thanks

DISH ETIQUETTE:  1) Please soak pots & pans IMMEDIATELY after use.  2) Put dishes in dishwasher right after washing them out.   3) Place cleaned cookware on a towel next to the sink.  4) Rinse dishes right after use.  5) Be considerate!

…Lydia decided to add a few “tips” of her own. (The large signs on the oven and the microwave were already there.)

Roommate's revenge

related: Meet the world’s crankiest roommate

→ 23 CommentsFILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · blitzkrieg approach · cleaning · college life · dishes · etiquette · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · kitchen · microwave · Minnesota · rebuttals · roommates · sponges