How hazing rituals are born

May 22nd, 2007 · 12 comments

Jimmy in Worcester brings this jaunty little note from the Lambda Chi Alpha House at WPI.

Says Jimmy: “The kid whose cookware was hidden ended up just leaving the utensils (tongs, spatula, etc…) wherever they were hidden and simply bought a new set. This forced the kid who originally hid them to find them again before they started to stink up the place.”

Just in case you needed another reason to pass on the Lambda Chis’ rush-week pancake breakfast…

Dear Brother Who's Cooking Supplies Were Left Here,  You may notice that they are all one, where they are I cannot tell you. all I can say is that they are strategically hidden throughout the house. The time that it takes you to find them all should equal the time it took to clean up after you and the big mess you left in the kitchen (and not to mention all summer.) Happy Hunting! -FUBAR

→ 12 CommentsFILED UNDER: college life · dishes · fratboys · kitchen · stealing · Worcester


And/or random things

May 22nd, 2007 · 11 comments

Such a perfect little hat trick at the end of this note (submitted by Laura in Baltimore) — the four exclamation points, the heart, the “thx.”

Please refrain from leaving piles of work and/or random things on my chair when I'm away! It makes me want to poke my eyes out!!!

→ 11 CommentsFILED UNDER: Baltimore · exclamation-point happy!!!! · garbage · heart · office · thx


But…but that’s not really passive-aggressive!

May 22nd, 2007 · 16 comments

Um, yeah. I know.

For the purposes of this project, we’re using a pretty broad (and to some extent, arbitrary) definition of “passive-aggressive” — one that roughly correlates with how the term is popularly used. (Most people don’t go diving for the dsm IV when someone describes his or her roommate as “so passive-aggressive” or “so antisocial” or “so sadistic” or “so schizo,” for that matter.)

Some of the notes here are really more aggressive, and some of them are just plain passive, but they all share a common sense of frustration that’s been channeled into a written note rather than a face-to-face confrontation.

While it may be more accurate, “asshole-ish notes from roommates, neighbors, coworkers and strangers” just doesn’t roll off the tongue quite as easily, you know?

→ 16 CommentsFILED UNDER: memo


That means you, Freda

May 21st, 2007 · 11 comments

Danny snapped this understated little note at a senior center in Marysville, Missouri. It seems a bit futile, really. I know that no sign would stop my grandmother from putting in her two cents.

Please do not tell the other player how to shoot or play unless they ask for your opinion. Thanks.

→ 11 CommentsFILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · Missouri · old folks · unsolicited feedback


Some legionnaire’s idea of epigrammatic wit

May 21st, 2007 · 10 comments

I realize this example (from outside the American Legion HQ in Park Slope, Brooklyn) is not so much “passive-aggressive” as it is “crazy,” but it tickles me too much not to post. The little species/feces couplet has been painted over and re-written at least twice, so obviously I’m not the only one who appreciated it.

CONDEMNED NO LITTERING. Dump no garbage here. Join the human species - don't dump - even feces!

DO NOT LITTER. PERIOD. END OF STORY.

You can’t tell from these photos, but this little storefront stands as one of the few bastions on Fifth Avenue that the armies of invading gentrifiers couldn’t take down with their industrial-size nozzles of mrs. meyer’s and turn into a precious little bakery selling organic dog cupcakes. While I was taking these photos a man in a lawn chair was either yelling at me to stop or trying to sell me a ratty old suitcase.

→ 10 CommentsFILED UNDER: Brooklyn · crazypants · exclamation-point happy!!!! · garbage · more aggressive than passive · Park Slope · shit


With 17 roommates, it could have been worse

May 21st, 2007 · 17 comments

This lovely petri dish courtesy of Ben, who explains: “While living in a house in London with 17 people from all over the world, things become way too green. This had to be done every once in a while in order to remind others not to overpopulate our kitchen with new living organisms.”

If you don't want GREEN stuff growing out of our plates, please wash your dishes. Cheers

related: Maybe someone can do this dishes? :)

→ 17 CommentsFILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · dishes · London · roommates


No smelly foods

May 21st, 2007 · 16 comments

It started with “no smelly foods,” says Kathleen, and escalated from there.

related: NO FISH in the microwave!

→ 16 CommentsFILED UNDER: excessive underlining · food · group bitchfest · microwave · odor · office · smartass


That shit is disrespectful.

May 20th, 2007 · 51 comments

Mike gets the last word in this exchange.

WTF Mike, I just sat in some piss on the seat. Clean up after yourself! That shit is disrespectful. -KreggOh please. Last I used the toilet I was sitting, reading a book. Am I to hear I have magical flying piss now? Let's not even get me started on cleanliness issues, shall we? And honestly, stop it w/ the passive-aggressive notes and walk-by accusations. "that shit is disrespectful" -Mike

→ 51 CommentsFILED UNDER: bathroom · Baton Rouge · meta · piss · roommates · that's disrespectful · toilet


I spit in mine

May 20th, 2007 · 3 comments

Spotted on the office fridge by Sam, who also brings us this little gem — the most precise vending-machine operating instructions ever written.

PLEASE STOP STEALING MY FOOD! (I spit in mine! Enjoy!) And I want my nice Tupperware back!!!

related: Spit & Vinegar

→ 3 CommentsFILED UNDER: exclamation-point happy!!!! · food · New York · office fridge · spitting · stealing


When you get down to it

May 20th, 2007 · 24 comments

Thanks to Rachel for bringing to light another key battleground for office passive-aggressives: the thermostat.

Folks, as you know, we have control over the office thermostat above, but please, let's never turn it down to 55 degrees. Turning it to this temperature does not make the office cool down more quickly; it simply makes the air conditioning never stop pushing cold air. This thermostat is located too far from the A/C to reach such an extremely cold temperature (which is what would turn the system off and on to regulate the temperature). And when you get down to it, 55 degrees outdoors is coat weather anyway. In the large room at the end of the office, this endless blast of cold air can make it almost unbearable to work — things on our desks even turn cold to the touch! Come and stand near the windows and the A/C vents and you'll see. If there's an area of the office or a private office that isn't cooling properly, please have Nina help out by calling building maintenance and getting it fixed. But the general thermostat should not go below 70. Those of us sitting next to the A/C vents thank you very much!

related: This is your friend the thermostat

→ 24 CommentsFILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · New York · office · temperature