What is it about dog shit that pushes Brooklynites over the edge?

May 18th, 2007 · 25 comments

Wesh snapped this a few years back in Red Hook, Brooklyn, while walking from his brother’s rehearsal dinner to the after-party bar.

Says Wesh: “What gets me are the flags. Why flags?”

CLEAN UP AFTER YOUR DOGS MOTHERFUCKERS KICK YOUR ASS

(How bougie does Park Slope’s version look in comparison?)

→ 25 CommentsFILED UNDER: Brooklyn · dogs · more aggressive than passive · shit


That’d be GREAT

May 18th, 2007 · 11 comments

In evidence here, a key element of the passive-aggressive lexicon —and one of the many elevated to catchphrase status by Mike Judge.

This example comes from Peter (no, not that Peter), who has since escaped roommate living but offers these words of wisdom for those of us who haven’t: “Never trust anyone who uses post-it notes at home.”

Peter — I'm not too happy with your inability to provide me with some cookies. If we could fix this situation, that'd be great. Thanks, Jon

related: Too many

→ 11 CommentsFILED UNDER: food · roommates · royal we


Just severe enough

May 18th, 2007 · 12 comments

From William, who notes: “Sadly, management thought this was too severe, so it was replaced with a long whiny treatise on coffee etiquette.”

If you leave the coffee pot low, you fail at life. Please make more coffee!

related: A coffee-maker flowchart

→ 12 CommentsFILED UNDER: coffee · Comic Sans Alert · etiquette · office


Maybe next time you should try Power Point?

May 17th, 2007 · 25 comments

The visual aid here is genius, and I love the piggyback note. (Once two people join in, the whole thing has a tendency to spiral out of control into a massive anonymous bitchfest.)

Please do not leave the toilet in this state. Other people have to use it too. Also, please respect that women use this restroom & please put the seat down!

Spotted by Steve.

UPDATE: the sign-maker writes in to claim his handiwork! Oliver explains:

I was horrified at this state, but I also did not want to be labeled as the person that left the toilet in this state. I wanted to clean up the mess but then how would I communicate my disgust to the unknown person that actually did it? So this was my solution. Document the offense including time found and then clean up.

Like I said: genius.

→ 25 CommentsFILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · bathroom · office · toilet


Nobody wants your disgusting tuna sandwich, but we’ll fondle it out of spite

May 17th, 2007 · 2 comments

From Giovanni: a classic example of the “office fridge” sub-genre.

Please DO NOT TOUCH or eat. Thanks.

→ 2 CommentsFILED UNDER: excessive underlining · food · office · office fridge · pleasantries as afterthought · touching


Just in case you’re running on Central Time

May 17th, 2007 · 7 comments

I agree with Amy: “EST” is what really makes this one.

Dear enthusiastic EPID students: We have a class every Tu + Th from 11:00 am (EST) to 1:00 pm (EST). PLEASE try to refrain from entering the classroom until 1:00 (EST). We really enjoy our class + would prefer to not be interrupted. Thank you for your consideration.


→ 7 CommentsFILED UNDER: college life · excessive underlining · Michigan · noise


Have a nice day

May 13th, 2007 · 6 comments

The latest in a series previously documented here and here…right across the street from my Park Slope apartment.

Have a nice day. Please don't let your dog shit here and please don't TAG on my door! Thanks :)

Update: Another one!

related: The Pooper Stooper

→ 6 CommentsFILED UNDER: dogs · neighbors · Park Slope · shit · smiley


Please, please, please

May 13th, 2007 · 8 comments

There’s something so wildly theatrical about this sign, spotted in Gowanus, Brooklyn. I wouldn’t be surprised if it burst into song.

Please, please, please...GARBAGE FOR TENANTS ONLY!

→ 8 CommentsFILED UNDER: Brooklyn · garbage · landlords and property managers · neighbors


It was an ironic dance party, okay?

May 12th, 2007 · 23 comments

Slipped under our door by the downstairs neighbors.

Ya'll: This is the 3rd time Michael Jackson, Amy Grant, and the cast of Disney have invaded my apartment against my will. I tried knocking + was unheard or ignored. I don't want to have to rat you out, but if it doesn't stop ASAP I'm calling the policy. SORRY, Apt. 1

(Guilty as charged.)

related: Seriously…Sugar Ray?

→ 23 CommentsFILED UNDER: Brooklyn · music · neighbors · noise · not-so-veiled threats · Park Slope · the po-po


A single unit

May 12th, 2007 · 34 comments

At first glace, this notice  — from an auto shop somewhere between New York and Atlantic City — doesn’t seem to fit the criteria for a passive-aggressive note (observe the absence of faux niceties like “please” or “thanks!!!”), but the pseudo-helpful clarification (“this means pants + shirts as a single unit…”) helps inch it just over the line.

To all employees: You must wear the unitard that was provided! This means pants + shirts as a single unit...

→ 34 CommentsFILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · attire · New Jersey · obnoxious definition · office · whiteboard