I Can’t Believe It’s Not (My) Butter

January 15th, 2012 · 27 comments

Tommy in Norway isn’t the only one getting butt-hurt over butter.

From the U.K…

I don't know your name, but you have seen stealing my butter. Put it back in the fridge or I will lick EVERYTHING.

to Australia…

Beck' s butter: Lisa if you touch it ur dead!!!!

to Ireland…

Stop eating our butter, and anything else that is ours.

it’s beginning to look like this butter crisis might be going global.

Meanwhile, in America…

related: A bitter butter battle

→ 27 CommentsFILED UNDER: butter · licking · stealing


Karma Police

January 12th, 2012 · 55 comments

This is what you get when you mess with us:

If you "attempt" to throw something away & miss or if the trashcan is already full & you pile it on top, or if the bag has fallen in & you don't fit it & just add your disgusting garbage to it, then WE HATE YOU! Don't worry about who "WE" are, just worry about cleaning up after yourself. IT IS BAD KARMA to leave your trash lying around!!! <3 the karma police have a nice day! :)

In other words: You’re a creep. You’re a weirdo. What the hell are you doing here? You don’t belong here!

SODA in H2O cups is BAD KARMA

Please help prevent bad karma: DO NOT flush feminine hygiene products. Place in waste basket. Thank you, Management.

(Thanks to Bonnie from North Carolina, Eric in California, and Paperback Writer in Pittsburgh for their submissions!)

 

related: Karma’s a bitch.

→ 55 CommentsFILED UNDER: Coke · garbage · have a nice day · karma's a bitch · smiley · toilet


The font loathed round the world

January 11th, 2012 · 40 comments

No matter the hemisphere, Comic Sans gets no love. (This note, however, seems to have inspired a Brazilian copycat.)

Please keep this door closed. Management. Please don't use Comic Sans if you're serious.

Rodolfo’s rough translation from the Portuguese:

Please keep this door closed. Management.

Please don’t use Comic Sans if you’re serious.

related: The original “please don’t use Comic Sans”

→ 40 CommentsFILED UNDER: Brazil · Comic Sans Alert · Copycat


The parenthetical smiley says it all

January 5th, 2012 · 60 comments

Writes our submitter in Dallas: “My ex-roommate is possibly THE most passive-aggressive person I’ve ever met. We’ve reconciled, mostly, but we still have our moments. For example, just after Christmas, she was going out of town and wanted me to look after her cat. She used the same e-mail as an opportunity to say thank you for the Christmas gift my girlfriend and I gave her.

Thanks to you both for the bag; it was lovely. (Might want to get the clearance tag all the way off though first, next time. :) )

related: Thanks for saving me the trouble of writing a thank you note!

→ 60 CommentsFILED UNDER: mean girls · smiley · thanks (but not really)


Tangled

January 4th, 2012 · 240 comments

Julie in Milwaukee has been trying to drag her nine-year-old daughter to get a haircut for ages. The day of the planned trim, Mom found this prize bit of melodrama waiting on her bed.

Mom, Dad I love you but you can't cut my hair if you do I will never forgive you I love my hair and guess you don't love me enough to do what I want for a change [drawings:

related: A Mother’s Day Report Card

 

 

→ 240 CommentsFILED UNDER: guilt trip · hair · kids · Milwaukee · Moms & Dads · visual aids


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