Our submitter in Townsville, Australia says that Christmas decorating season is in full swing.Unfortunately, all those strings of lights have set off a string of front-yard vandalism as well. And in Townsville, people take their Christmas lights seriously.
In the spirit of the season, one disgruntled resident has added this sign to his decor. “I’m not sure how the choice profanity will go down with hundreds of cars full of children passing by every night,” she writes. (Please note that our submitter has pre-censored the profanity from the photo, in deference to our readers’ delicate sensibilities.)
Meanwhile, in Michigan, I think this local news headline says it all:
Beheaded Mickey Mouse Christmas decoration leaves Davison resident upset, children scared
Well, in any case, it says considerably more than the accompanying photo of this terrifying scene:
My favorite quote from the article:
“She was able to sew Mickey back together and use some Gorilla tape to patch up the gingerbread man, but some of her children’s innocence has been lost.”
related: Decor-nappings of Christmases past
extra credit: “Queenslander risks death for killer Christmas light display” [abc news brisbane]
FILED UNDER: Australia · Christmas · holiday spirit · stealing · the F word · Won't somebody think of the children?
Alice in Fresno says that since this sign went up, she’s made a point of greeting the copier every time she passes it. The coworker who wrote it was apparently tired of hearing people cursing out the (stupid!) machine when it screws up (all the damn time!).
related: The printer doesn’t appreciate your tone.
FILED UNDER: anthropomorphism · Fresno · office · the printer
A reader in Canberra, Australia passed along this article about an English granny up in arms about her right to display a knitted toy gorilla in her window.
Says the article:
Anne Feast, 70, knitted ‘Cilla the Gorilla’ last year and the toy has been hanging in the window at her home in Bell Holt, Ely, alongside numerous other characters she has created, ever since.
But mother and grandmother-of-two Anne, who has lived in her home with her husband, Philip, 71, for around 14 years, was asked by police to remove the gorilla after it was reported by a passer-by.
The couple don’t know exactly why Cilla caused offence, but they suspect it is either because someone thought it was racist or the way that the ape hangs down.
Yes…the way the ape hangs down. Oh, and here’s a transcription of that note:
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN Are you the person that made a complaint to the police about the knitted toy gorilla in our window Well why did you not knock on our door and tell us face to face what your concerns were about this toy. These toys usually bring a smile to most people’s faces especially kiddies. I am so looking forwards to seeing your face but it’s not going to happen IS IT?????
Adds our submitter: “I love the fact that on top of the note she makes sure the message reaches its target by calling the local newspaper for coverage.”
related: A day in the life of a crank
extra credit: The meme that wasn’t!
FILED UNDER: a matter of taste · newspaper · old folks · the po-po · U.K.
Our submitter says she spotted this request during a walk around her neighborhood in Oakland, California.
related: How not to solve your stray cat problem
FILED UNDER: neighbors · that's unsanitary
Laura in Victoria noticed this unofficially annotated official notice while studying late one night at the UVic Campus. Says Laura: “Given that it’s posted in a building crammed with tired university students, the original notewriter probably have been able to predict what would happen next.”
And what happened next was…BUTTS.
related: This is not a bulletin board.
FILED UNDER: Canada · college life · smartass
Writes Joanna in Pennsylvania: “Following (apparently) more than one incident in which a customer relieved themselves in the stand-up tanning booths in my town, this signage was posted in every tanning booth. Because, ya know, people need to be reminded to not just randomly crap themselves every time they get naked.”
Adds Joanna: ” Yes, I asked an employee and the incidents in question involved #2!” If it makes you feel any better, Joanna, it turns out your problem is far from unique to south central PA.
related: On preparing a hide for tanning
FILED UNDER: Pennsylvania · shit · that's unsanitary
Karen in Council Bluffs, Iowa spotted this unsigned note taped to the vending machine in the office breakroom. It sounds like somebody certainly got their 75 cents worth, no?
related: Raging against the (vending) machine
FILED UNDER: candy · Iowa · office · vending machine drama
Writes our submitter from London: “I can only imagine the local politics that brought about this pre-Christmas gem of a note in the historic town if Lewes, England.” Any Lewes locals out there who could shed some light on this light-box snub?
related: Fish fingers and custard then, yeah?
FILED UNDER: retail hell · U.K.
Writes Derek from Ohio: “I found this on an anthropological blog I follow and thought it would fit great on your site.” I agree, Derek, I agree!
related: No candy go away!
extra credit: Do I have to give candy to poor kids? [slate.com]
FILED UNDER: casual sexism · Halloween
This one speaks for itself, no?
(Thanks to our submitter, Bonnie in Edinburgh.)
related: A review of last night’s performance
FILED UNDER: neighbors · noise