Don is the organizer of a doughnut co-op in his Chicago office, in which each co-worker takes a turn bringing in doughnuts every Friday to share with the rest of the group. “One of my co-workers is notorious for cutting doughnuts in half and leaving the other half behind in the box,” Don says, “which annoys some of the other members of the co-op. Apparently a co-worker felt that I was failing to maintain doughnut discipline and took it upon himself to post this warning.”
Adds Don: “Half-doughnuts are no longer showing up.”

related: The Office Breakroom Nibbler
FILED UNDER: Chicago · etiquette · food · office
FILED UNDER: garbage · you know who you are
Brad in Nebraska says this birthday card from his six-year-old niece, Dani, stopped the whole family in its tracks. (With its awesomeness, I assume!) Mckenna, you are one lucky lady.

Happy “WTF?” Wednesday, everyone!
related: Mom likes Dad’s meat
FILED UNDER: birthday · kids · not so much passive-aggressive
Rob in Dallas says this note appeared “after the martial arts ‘gym’ closed down unexpectedly.” (Full disclosure: I have no idea what “gym” is supposed to imply.)
![Warning to the few good people here. A lying phoney bastard called Hawkins was teaching martial arts upstairs. If you meet this scumbag don't sign any papers the asswhole [sic] teaches nothing but shit Warning to the few good people here. A lying phoney bastard called Hawkins was teaching martial arts upstairs. If you meet this scumbag don't sign any papers the asswhole [sic] teaches nothing but shit](http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3088/2603732421_f006e37bf8.jpg)
P.S. I’m sure I’m not alone in picturing Hawkins like this:

related: Peter, professional tattoo artist and assistant instructor of Japanese swordsmanship
FILED UNDER: Dallas/Fort Worth · spelling and grammar police · warning · WTF?
An eye for an eye, I understand. But a flower for joint inflammation?

(Thanks to Sandra in Los Angeles for submitting!)
related: No, He uses Vaseline.
FILED UNDER: flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · God · Los Angeles · stealing
Writes Nick in New York: “Those of you who have ever lived alone will remember the feeling of liberation and wild abandon that comes with getting your first solo space after a lifetime of family and crazy roommates.”
He continues: ”Unfortunately, I’ve got neighbors across a very narrow alley (about 6 feet across) and all our windows face each other. When I first moved in I noticed their shades were always down so I carried on with the kinds of things mid-20s guys do when they live alone. I have no idea what they had an opportunity to see, but it was enough to inspire them to post this note on all three windows. Whoops?”

related: Buy curtains. Please.
FILED UNDER: actually totally reasonable · neighbors · New York
Having only worked at this office for a short time, Kay in Houston doesn’t know exactly what “The Fish Smell Invasion of 2012” refers to, “but being familiar with what happens in shared fridges,” she says, “I can guess.”

And as an extra special bonus: my (procrastinatory) ode to “The Fish Smell Invasion of 2012″ —

related: Passive-Aggressive Poetry Corner
FILED UNDER: odor · office fridge · pure poetry
Our submitter says this note, written by “by a fellow employee who finally had enough of working in the inferno we call Burger King,” quickly made the rounds of the entire staff after being handed into the manager.
“It’s funny,” she says, “because for three years this employee pretended to like everyone, and we would have never expected him to say or write anything like this. He even took the opportunity to insult the Hispanic kitchen staff!”

related: Have it your way, jerk!
FILED UNDER: casual xenophobia · farewell letter
It’s stuff like this that makes me remember why I live alone…

related: The Toilet Paper Manifesto
FILED UNDER: Facebook · oh snap · roommates
Seriously, Jay?

related: S is for Sibling Rivalry
FILED UNDER: food · message to all intended for one · office · public shaming