Writes Kiki in Melbourne: “Have you ever seen a sack act so bitchy and sanctimonious all at once? I can’t believe a plastic bag’s attitude actually started to piss me off!”
Well, Kiki, it could be worse.
related: …and F the Polar Bear!
extra credit: I (don’t) use plastic bags.
→ 46 CommentsFILED UNDER: Melbourne · recycling · The Earth · unnecessary "quotation marks"
Spotted by Kathy at her office lunchroom in Seattle:
The real sad reality?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqDzKad2Q3M
related: You sure nag like my mother…
→ 19 CommentsFILED UNDER: cleaning · office · rebuttals · Seattle · smartass · Your mother doesn't...
Tommy in Norway isn’t the only one getting butt-hurt over butter.
From the U.K…
to Australia…
to Ireland…
it’s beginning to look like this butter crisis might be going global.
Meanwhile, in America…
related: A bitter butter battle
→ 29 CommentsFILED UNDER: butter · licking · stealing
This is what you get when you mess with us:
In other words: You’re a creep. You’re a weirdo. What the hell are you doing here? You don’t belong here!
(Thanks to Bonnie from North Carolina, Eric in California, and Paperback Writer in Pittsburgh for their submissions!)
related: Karma’s a bitch.
→ 55 CommentsFILED UNDER: Coke · garbage · have a nice day · karma's a bitch · smiley · toilet
No matter the hemisphere, Comic Sans gets no love. (This note, however, seems to have inspired a Brazilian copycat.)
Rodolfo’s rough translation from the Portuguese:
Please keep this door closed. Management.
Please don’t use Comic Sans if you’re serious.
related: The original “please don’t use Comic Sans”
→ 40 CommentsFILED UNDER: Brazil · Comic Sans Alert · Copycat
Writes our submitter in Dallas: “My ex-roommate is possibly THE most passive-aggressive person I’ve ever met. We’ve reconciled, mostly, but we still have our moments. For example, just after Christmas, she was going out of town and wanted me to look after her cat. She used the same e-mail as an opportunity to say thank you for the Christmas gift my girlfriend and I gave her.
related: Thanks for saving me the trouble of writing a thank you note!
→ 60 CommentsFILED UNDER: mean girls · smiley · thanks (but not really)
Julie in Milwaukee has been trying to drag her nine-year-old daughter to get a haircut for ages. The day of the planned trim, Mom found this prize bit of melodrama waiting on her bed.
related: A Mother’s Day Report Card
→ 242 CommentsFILED UNDER: guilt trip · hair · kids · Milwaukee · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2012 · visual aids
They stole your food, disrupted your sleep, acted like slobs…and usually somehow managed to blame you. 2011: the year of assholes (and the snarky smartasses who goad them.)
Chief among them, and the landslide winner of the 2011 “douchecanoe of the year” award: the insufferably self-righteous vegan. Not that there wasn’t some stiff competition, of course. Cast your votes in the comments!
![DO NOT REMOVE. This is the property of unit 1. We pay rent for this carspace and shall therefore use it for whatever vehicle we want to. [crossed out scribbles]](https://farm7.static.flickr.com/6203/6027389430_4e0bc2265a_b.jpg)
→ 37 CommentsFILED UNDER: most popular notes of 2011
From the ladies’ room…
And the men’s room…
And the men’s room, one day later…
related: And a Happy New Year to you!
→ 39 CommentsFILED UNDER: bodily fluids · hygiene · office · toilet
Jess in St. Louis says this dumpster “is definitely a manifestation of the microcosm of American value clashes that is my block.” Adds Jess: “Hopefully we can all survive the cardboard waste of Christmas in one piece.”
![Whoever threw away all that cardboard. Do it again and I'll fill your yard with it. Don't be an Asshole. Recycle. [Response] QUIT Being a Nanny-State, Progressive, Liberal, ASS and try to FORCE me to recycle if I don't want to. FU & F the Polar Bear! And if I catch you in my yard, realize, I support the 2nd Ammendmant [sic]. this was written by someone who choses to recycle.](https://farm8.static.flickr.com/7033/6554915221_25ef752714.jpg "Whoever threw away all that cardboard. Do it again and I'll fill your yard with it. Don't be an Asshole. Recycle. [Response] QUIT Being a Nanny-State, Progressive, Liberal, ASS and try to FORCE me to recycle if I don't want to. FU & F the Polar Bear! And if I catch you in my yard, realize, I support the 2nd Ammendmant [sic]. this was written by someone who choses to recycle.")
![QUIT Being a Nanny-State, Progressive, Liberal, ASS and try to FORCE me to recycle if I don't want to. FU & F the Polar Bear! And if I catch you in my yard, realize, I support the 2nd Ammendmant [sic]. this was written by someone who choses to recycle.](https://farm8.static.flickr.com/7027/6597044819_bd2527e507.jpg "QUIT Being a Nanny-State, Progressive, Liberal, ASS and try to FORCE me to recycle if I don't want to. FU & F the Polar Bear! And if I catch you in my yard, realize, I support the 2nd Ammendmant [sic]. this was written by someone who choses to recycle.")
related: The right to bear fruit
→ 56 CommentsFILED UNDER: irregular capitalization · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · politics · recycling · St. Louis · The Earth
