Bernie in Sydney recently discovered this hidden behind a painting in his parents’ house — “the passive-aggressive conclusion to a long-running argument about demolishing the kitchen wall.”
Explains Bernie: “Mum wants the wall demolished to make the kitchen nicer; Dad insists it’s impossible and unnecessary. I honestly don’t know how my parents have managed to last 25 years together.”

related: Give the gift of honesty
FILED UNDER: danger · love & marriage · Moms & Dads · Sydney
Joe in Berkeley doesn’t know who this note was intended for, but it showed up on his porch sometime after Thanksgiving dinner.
![Mr. Cranky - While I understand that dog[s] shit on your lawn frequently...don't EVER come at me, my girlfriend, or Dog in such an ignorant, aggressive and childish fashion. You are not the dog-shit sheriff of Berkeley. If you ever speak to me in that manner again I will be sure to send a pack of Huskies who've recently eaten pounds of broccoli and chill to shit all over your lawn. If you see me again on the street an apology might make you feel like a BIG responsible boy. Otherwise, don't speak to me, Brroo, Your Neighbor Mr. Cranky - While I understand that dog[s] shit on your lawn frequently...don't EVER come at me, my girlfriend, or Dog in such an ignorant, aggressive and childish fashion. You are not the dog-shit sheriff of Berkeley. If you ever speak to me in that manner again I will be sure to send a pack of Huskies who've recently eaten pounds of broccoli and chill to shit all over your lawn. If you see me again on the street an apology might make you feel like a BIG responsible boy. Otherwise, don't speak to me, Brroo, Your Neighbor](https://farm7.static.flickr.com/6052/6402484737_36ff9de11f_b.jpg)
related: The Pooper Stooper
FILED UNDER: dogs · neighbors · not-so-veiled threats · shit
FILED UNDER: gaming · Illinois · most popular notes of 2011 · neighbors · noise · non-apology apology · p.s. · the po-po
As a vegan, our submitter in California appreciated this marquee.

related: A turkey’s idea of Thanksgiving
FILED UNDER: Thanksgiving
Writes Mrs. McMahon in Melbourne, Australia: “One of the students in my class decided to make a a big card for World Teachers Day and have it signed by all her peers in our grade. When I read this message, I could not stop laughing.”
![Dear Mrs. McMahon, Your [sic] a good teacher, but not my most favourite. Dear Mrs. McMahon, Your [sic] a good teacher, but not my most favourite.](https://farm7.static.flickr.com/6217/6290509116_545a23bb34.jpg)
related: Teacher appreciation letters from first graders
FILED UNDER: Australia · kids · Melbourne · schools & teachers · your/you're
The subtle version (from Denver, Colorado):

And the not-so-subtle version (spotted by Ariana in Boulder, Colorado):

related: Is it really worth $1.59 to spend eternity in one of the lower kingdoms?
extra credit: Coke, Sprite, or Ice-T
FILED UNDER: beverages · Boulder · Colorado · Denver · restaurant · stealing
Writes our submitter in Philadelphia: “In our apartment building, packages are left by the block of mailboxes, relatively near where your individual mailbox is. I’ve never had a problem, but apparently not everyone was so lucky…this sign was on every floor of the building.”

related: I hope your cat chokes.
FILED UNDER: most popular notes of 2011 · neighbors · Philadelphia · stealing · toilet paper
Ah, first world problems.

(Spotted by Kim in Manchester, U.K.)
related: My query on the egg salad ban
FILED UNDER: college life · Manchester · U.K. · vending machine drama
Reports Barb in Las Vegas: “A woman in our office, originally from the Philippines, just got her citizenship. Our often inappropriate receptionist wrote this note on her card.”

Yes, that really does say “no more climbing over barbed wire in the nite.” Adds Barb: “She also printed lyrics from West Side Story in giant font and hung them in the area where we had celebratory cake. So odd!”

related: America the not-so-beautiful
FILED UNDER: Comic Sans Alert · Las Vegas · misplaced patriotism · office · oh no you didn't · WTF?
Apparently only the not-so-valuable employees get banished to this closet, as spotted by Lindsey in Kansas.
(Psst, Savanna! You might want to check this place out.)


Meanwhile, Kristi in Oregon noticed that inner peace is apparently not on the menu for the general public at this vegetarian restaurant.

related: The Sushi Nazi
FILED UNDER: Kansas · not so much passive-aggressive · restaurant