Neat freaks on speed

December 17th, 2013 · 129 comments

Our submitter in Boston says she found this note on the kitchen counter “after my evil roommate abused some Adderall and stayed up cleaning, organizing, and generally banging around till an obscene hour.”

I am so sorry that I cleaned the entire house again. I am also sorry for doing everybody's dishes + cleaning up after their dishes. Have fun trashing the entire apartment. Especially since you have never been loud :)

Adds our submitter: “I can’t wait until the day when I live alone.”

related: The patron(izing) saint of roommates

→ 129 CommentsFILED UNDER: Boston · cleaning · mean girls · roommates · smiley · thanks (but not really)


Bah humbug, bitches!

December 16th, 2013 · 47 comments

Writes Eric: “My sister and her boss got a little tired of the constant banter outside their offices.”

NO CACKLE ZONE

(Note: This above sign is not to be confused with the “no cankle zone” delineated by a competing faction of office mean girls.)

related: The Office LOL Police

→ 47 CommentsFILED UNDER: mean girls · noise · office · way harsh


Also, Santa hates you

December 12th, 2013 · 165 comments

Writes our submitter from Portland, Oregon: “People steal out of the fridge all the time, so I’m not sure why someone thought money would be safe taped to barbecue sauce.”

Happy Holidays Co-Workers! Are you $2 richer? Did you find $2 taped to a bottle of BBQ sauce in the fridge? Well that means you are a thief! Also Santa hates you and I hope a Reinder poops on you. Merry Christmas you dirty animal!

related: I hope you…

→ 165 CommentsFILED UNDER: Christmas · holiday spirit · money · most popular notes of 2013 · office fridge · stealing


Really, Mom, you shouldn’t have.

December 10th, 2013 · 76 comments

Victoria in Maryland received this heartwarming card from her mother a few years ago. (“She was mad because I put an end to her partying in the garage at my house.”)

Just out of obligation, Mom

related: More birthday mama drama!

→ 76 CommentsFILED UNDER: birthday · Mother-daughter notes · way harsh


Also, kindly refrain from rinsing your laundry in the hot tub

December 9th, 2013 · 69 comments

Writes Natalie in Cardiff: “I noticed this a little while ago in the changing rooms of my local leisure centre. I thought it fit in nicely with the public/private restroom notes these last couple of days. Perhaps people in South Wales are a little mixed-up too!”

Customer Notice: Female Dryside Changing Area - Customers are reminded that the practice of hair dying [sic] and shaving within the changing area is strictly prohibited. Please use in accordance with its intended purpose. Thank you in anticipation of your cooperation

related: Hair-raising indignation

extra credit: Weird Wales [bbc.co.uk]

→ 69 CommentsFILED UNDER: gym · hygiene · Wales


Excuse me, this is my private public bathroom

December 5th, 2013 · 125 comments

Our submitter from Washington state found this note in one of the restrooms in her office building.”The toothbrushes and mouthwash have been there for a few weeks,” she says. “I’m not sure why they’re there or who posted the note, but I appreciate the incredulous tone.”

Is this a staff collection of tooth brushes? WHAT IS HAPPENING!?

I don’t really have anything against brushing your teeth at the office, but between yesterday’s note and today’s, I’m starting to wonder if “public restroom” means something different to people on the West Coast. This posting from a Los Angeles-based Yelp user only deepened my suspicions:

The Office Bathroom: a home away from home?

related: “You are not fit to use a public toilet, you filthy mutt.”

extra credit: The Office Bathroom: Now a Home Away From Home [forbes.com]

→ 125 CommentsFILED UNDER: bathroom · hygiene · office · Washington state


So much for No-Shave November

December 4th, 2013 · 72 comments

Our submitter in Tempe found this notice posted in the men’s bathroom of a classroom building on the ASU campus. In a word…yuck.

Dear asshat who shave in the bathroom on November 4, Maybe your mother didn't teach you this, but in public places it is common courtesy to clean up your messes after you make them. Leaving your shaved whiskers all over the sink and disabled toilet stall seat (?!WTF?!) is just plain gross. Please try to clean up after yourself so that others won't have to next time. Sincerely, Everybody Else

related: Body hair saga!

extra credit: 9 Things to Do with Human Hair [npr.org]

→ 72 CommentsFILED UNDER: bathroom · Tempe · that's disgusting · toilet


But…you said not to flush anything down the toilet?

December 3rd, 2013 · 70 comments

Writes Sarah: “I am deeply sorry, long-suffering San Diego Public Library, for whatever past incident(s) made this sign necessary…though I do appreciate the superfun font!”

ATTENTION: Please do not discard plastic bags with urine in this receptacle

related: Colostomy bags!

→ 70 CommentsFILED UNDER: library · piss · San Diego · so this is a thing?


Please, take me. Take me now.

December 2nd, 2013 · 33 comments

Spotted by Elissa in Annandale, Australia:

I have been dumped by my idiot owners. Pls take me! (It's okay! You'll get over her! There are so many desks out there.)

related: Free coat rack, gently used

→ 33 CommentsFILED UNDER: anthropomorphism · Australia · smartass


The potluck pedant

November 26th, 2013 · 91 comments

Writes our submitter in Washington state: “Shortly after our holiday party signup sheet was posted, this gentle reminder appeared, taped over the word ‘potluck.’ So far, no one has been brave enough to sign up for anything.”

(Because, you know, the best kind of potluck is six bags of chips, three plates of cookies, a one liter bottle of soda, and some plastic forks.)

1. pot luck used in reference to a situation in which one must take a chance that whatever is available will prove to be good or acceptable.  This is not a potluck if you have to sign up to bring something.

related: THE POTLUCK THEME IS MONGOLIA[N] BBQ!!!!!

extra credit: Potluck fear and loathing [latimes.com]

→ 91 CommentsFILED UNDER: holiday spirit · most popular notes of 2013 · obnoxious definition · office cop · party planning committee