4 girls, one garbage can | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

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Trash talk

April 27th, 2010 · 93 comments

I’m sure these ladies thank their lucky stars every day that they have each other as roommates. Wouldn’t you?

FILED UNDER: apostrophe abuse · college life · garbage · mean girls · Orlando · roommates · that's disgusting · whiteboard

93 responses so far ↓

#1 Having Fitz

Dear Roomie: probably about the same as yours, I guess. Surrounded by pop-cans, used tissues, candy wrappers, and some empty plants. Oh…sorry, I thought you said “recliner.”

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:10 pm rating: 90

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- #1.1 Fridge Pirate
  
  Your vagina was fucking delicious! :o)
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 8:34 pm rating: 90
- #1.2 Sue Do Nim
  
  That’s what he said.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 12:17 am rating: 90
- #1.3 mamason
  
  Don’t you dare…
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 10:52 am rating: 90
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#2 park rose

Just as well she’s not Petty, because I doubt there’d be anyway she’d break my heart.

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:10 pm rating: 90

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- #2.1 infant tyrone
  
  Ya Don’t Have Ta Live Like a Refuseé ?
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 10:56 am rating: 90
- #2.2 Mace Elaine
  
  I’m learning to fly,
  my pad ain’t got wings
  Throwing trash out
  Is the hardest thing.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 4:21 pm rating: 90
- #2.3 park rose
  
  Yes, Mace Elaine, the writing does looks like someone waved a flag at a red bull.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 5:07 pm rating: 90
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#3 park rose

Sounds like that time of the month for the ladies. Am I right, other ladies, or am I right? Should be a courtesy wrap, for sure. Also, are the ladies referred to in the note the amazing conjoined twins? 2 heads, one heart, one vagina. I bet more than just a few of us might be curious as to what that might look like. It’s a Bono lyric in the making.

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:12 pm rating: 90

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- #3.1 mamason
  
  Well, I for one, would like to see what their one, collective vagina looks like.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 6:38 pm rating: 90
- #3.2 veritybrown
  
  I think you’re right, park rose. Team note-writer! No one wants to be forced to deal with other people’s bodily fluids.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 7:07 pm rating: 90
- #3.3 Sowhatas
  
  It is probably a gaping maw of noxious odors much like a pit of despair or Sammath Naur.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:05 am rating: 90
- #3.4 Clumber
  
  I was totally Team Vagina until i read Rose’s hypothesis. If correct, then Team Aunt Flo needs to buy a fucking lidded garbage can for the bathroom and never, EVER let anyone be confronted by that sort of rot.
  
  Team Get a Fucking Garbage Can With A Lid !! (Team GaFGCWaL ? That sucks. I shall open the floor to suggestions for better Team Names with manageable acronyms. Team Mascot, however, is already chosen. Carrie.)
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:29 am rating: 90
- #3.5 Scribbles the Monkey
  
  I’m just gonna plug my ears with my index fingers here.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:54 am rating: 90
- #3.6 Cady
  
  If that’s the case, I’m ALL team note-writer. Not wrapping is not cool. What if a guest comes over, not to mention your poor roommates?!
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 1:00 pm rating: 90
- #3.7 Mace Elaine
  
  Borgina.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 4:12 pm rating: 90
- #3.8 park rose
  
  I’ve got something far more absorbent you could use to plug your ears, Scribbles. Comes in three sizes. The mini should do
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 4:43 pm rating: 90
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#4 shwonline

Id Hate 2 See What Ur Vagina Looks Like = Worst Prince song ever.

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:17 pm rating: 90

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- #4.1 dweeeebledee
  
  LMFAO!! Best comment EVER!!
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 8:11 pm rating: 90
- #4.2 Escape Goat
  
  “Get off. 23 gross-items in my trash can. Get off.” Oh, Prince.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 10:03 pm rating: 90
- #4.3 Blogmella
  
  Hahaha! GENIUS comment, shwonline!
  
  Not only the worst Prince song ever but also the most unlikely.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 4:15 am rating: 90
- #4.4 jaywalke
  
  Great pick-up line, though.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 7:58 am rating: 90
- #4.5 Sam S
  
  schwon owns the thread. Well done
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 12:54 pm rating: 90
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#5 Woman on the Verge

Geez. Next she’ll be saying, “Don’t use my vagina if you’re not gonna empty it!”

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:23 pm rating: 90

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- #5.1 park rose
  
  Or, the family planning motto :Don’t use my vagina if you’re gonna empty into it.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 11:27 pm rating: 90
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#6 gladystopia

And I’m assuming NoteWriter’s girlybits have fluffy pink flowers and happy dancing unicorns floating around them, all tastefully done in the style of a 1960′s “What Every Young Girl Should Know” pamphlet???

And also, she shits rainbows.

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:24 pm rating: 90

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#7 Splint Chesthair

As a former janitor, I can see I’ve seen worse. I think everyone should be required to be a janitor for 6 months. Puts a lot of stuff into perspective.

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:25 pm rating: 90

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- #7.1 Kat
  
  I salute you, sir or madam. After having worked in a job where all I had to do in a janitorial capacity was empty restroom trash and sanitary bags at the end of the day I can’t imagine what you would have seen.
  
  We don’t pay janitors enough. I would argue you CAN’T pay janitors enough.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 6:37 pm rating: 90
- #7.2 gladystopia
  
  Splint, you have my utmost respect on THAT one. I think I’d rather be the Assistant Organ-Sweeper-Upper In Charge of Extra-Gunky Cases at the County Morgue (and this IS Chicago, so our morgue gets some heavy shit) than have to clean a single stall in the ladies’ restroom where I work.
  
  I do not understand how women, all of whom are at least of an age to be getting advanced degrees at a snob-ass “highly regarded” business school, can suddenly devolve into pathogen-spewing barn animals at the slide of a bathroom door-latch. Those bathrooms make my catbox look hygienic.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 6:52 pm rating: 90
- #7.3 oi
  
  Cue: every janitor come here and bash women restrooms.
  Also, If you don’t tip you server, you have no right to walk on this “sacred but unjust to servers” earth.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 7:10 pm rating: 90
- #7.4 Xenobiologista
  
  That, or work in foodservice. I did both in college – totally makes you hate your classmates.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 12:48 am rating: 90
- #7.5 Splint Chesthair
  
  Well, I’d rather be a janitor than have to deal in the service industry. I think cleaning up after them is easier than dealing with them face to face. All I meant was that after cleaning up after them,your definition of “gross” gets a pretty high bar which enables you to deal with a lot of everyday messies a lot easier.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 6:44 am rating: 90
- #7.6 Sowhatas
  
  “pathogen-spewing barn animals”
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:08 am rating: 90
- #7.7 Mark
  
  You know, the pathogens get everywhere when the barn animals spew them. Even on your TOOTHBRUSH! Mythbusters proved it!
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:34 am rating: 90
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#8 Woman on the Verge

I’m just not sure the whole trash can/vagina comparison is working…

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:31 pm rating: 90

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- #8.1 Some one else
  
  I think that bit was just standard trash talk, haven’t you heard women yell that at each other during pick up games of basketball? It’s in the “your genitalia is unsuitable” class of taunts.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 6:37 pm rating: 90
- #8.2 Resident Grammarian esq
  
  That’s right you lint licker! These cootie queens have nothing on us!
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 8:31 pm rating: 90
- #8.3 Sean Jungian
  
  I actually prefer that class of taints.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 9:28 pm rating: 90
- #8.4 sleeps
  
  What the french, toast??
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 1:30 pm rating: 90
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#9 mamason

That reminds me… I need to go to the gynecologist.

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:36 pm rating: 90

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- #9.1 Woman on the Verge
  
  To see what they’re collecting in there or to take out the trash?
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 6:37 pm rating: 90
- #9.2 mamason
  
  Both, WotV. Both.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 6:42 pm rating: 90
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#10 infant tyrone

The surgical precision with which the note writer removed half of the top of that frozen food package rather than just doing the typically specified “peel top back halfway and stir to insure a crispy topping” puts me in awe of her physical capabilities.

This state of awe is considerably diminished by the quickness with which she parlays the explicit mental connection between a/her gross trash can and her roommates’/neighbors’ vaginas into the implicit connection between that same gross trash can and her own private splendor.

Well, we may have to make Prince a little richer, but we won’t be payin’ no royalties on that old Carly Simon tune, “You’re So Vain”.

Apr 27, 2010 at 6:50 pm rating: 90

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#11 Kate

I think the writer was addressing two issues. #1 – meaning to mention the trash, #2 – meaning to tell them once again, and more emphatically, that she didn’t want to play doctor.

Apr 27, 2010 at 7:00 pm rating: 90

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#12 claw71

Petty? You? Never! Inarticulate? Sure. Crude? Definitely. Inconsiderate, selfish, insulting, and inhospitable? Absolutely–but not petty.

By the way, while we’re on the subject of vaginae, have you heard of Vagisil? We’re not exactly sure what your vagina looks like but every so often when you move just so, we’re treated to the most unpleasant aroma. It’s like sardines, sourdough and over-cooked cabbage.

Apr 27, 2010 at 8:10 pm rating: 90

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- #12.1 se
  
  so what’s wrong with that, had a sandwich made just like that yesterday, with mustard
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 8:37 pm rating: 90
- #12.2 mamason
  
  se, I’ve told you time and again to stay out of my drawers.
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 10:49 pm rating: 90
- #12.3 Gandalf
  
  I had that sandwich at a Mongolian BBQ once, with Beaver mustard. It was fucking delicious!
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 2:42 pm rating: 90
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#13 Denny DelVecchio

This makes me think of Christmas 2003, when I gave my then best girl a $50 gift certificate to her gynecologist.

It didn’t go as planned.

Apr 27, 2010 at 8:17 pm rating: 90

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#14 Tim Kolb

Show me your cooter and I will empty your trash!

Apr 27, 2010 at 8:27 pm rating: 90

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#15 Silence

I don’t know what my vagina looks like, but my trashcan definitely looks like a twat: pink, moist, a truly distinct odor, and the odd bit of hair stuck along the rim.

Apr 27, 2010 at 8:44 pm rating: 90

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- #15.1 Divvitar
  
  LMFAO!
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 1:18 am rating: 90
- #15.2 mamason
  
  When referring to my vagina, I prefer the term, “scent”, no matter how much more accurate odor may be.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 1:37 am rating: 90
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#16 Shannon

Well logically, if they don’t empty their roommate’s trash, their “vagina” must be full of refuse as well.

Doesn’t everyone immediately think of a big ol’ vag when they see an overflowing trash can?

Apr 27, 2010 at 8:49 pm rating: 90

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#17 Escape Goat

“PS: I wrote this with a bloody tampon. This IS gross. “

Apr 27, 2010 at 9:47 pm rating: 90

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- #17.1 Clumber
  
  Goated one; I have never before felt such overwhelming disgust* while thumbing a PANer’s comment. And if I could, you’d get a dozen more thumbs, but alas Error :Already Voted!
  
  *ok, maybe a couple times when thumbing Claw….
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:35 am rating: 90
- #17.2 Woman on the Verge
  
  Dear Clumber, I thumbed Goat for you. Have a nice day. Love, Wo
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:38 am rating: 90
- #17.3 Escape Goat
  
  I’m always down for a good thumbin’. Now I better wash my hands.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 7:40 pm rating: 90
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#18 Sed

Is the Ur-vagina some form of proto-genitalia?

Apr 27, 2010 at 9:54 pm rating: 90

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#19 TippingCows

I first read it as “you ladies are lucky I’m not pretty” which made me wonder what that had to do with allowing people to use her trash (by the way, unless there is a trash can in YOUR bedroom how do you claim trash in common areas)?

Apr 27, 2010 at 11:06 pm rating: 90

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- #19.1 AuntyBron
  
  So did I, Tipper! Great minds mis-read alike!
  
  Apr 27, 2010 at 11:51 pm rating: 90
- #19.2 Mace Elaine
  
  Third to misread. I wonder what it would be like to live with a self-identified ugly person?
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 4:16 pm rating: 90
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#20 Catburglar

Dear not-petty, I know we live in a world where many things feminine are denigrated and undervalued, but I must tell you that thinking of your vagina, much less the UR-vagina, as comparable to a trash can, will only redound upon you in negative ways. If you stopped straddling that trash can in such a protective manner, I’m sure you’d immediately realize the distinction.

Apr 28, 2010 at 12:34 am rating: 90

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#21 Xenobiologista

What is it with people who live together but can’t even TALK to each other like decent human beings?

Apr 28, 2010 at 12:51 am rating: 90

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- #21.1 molly ringwald
  
  because people are passive agressive.
  
  and i think it would be hard to say “i’d hate 2 see what ur vagina looks like” to someone’s face.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 8:17 am rating: 90
- #21.2 mamason
  
  Apparently it’s not that difficult. I got that a lot after my youngest was born weighing in at 11 lbs.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 10:58 am rating: 90
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#22 Divvitar

I’m still trying to wrap my brain around what was so wrong that prompted the whole vag thing…were their tampons twisted into strange shapes or was there a coating of some strange cheese on them?

Apr 28, 2010 at 1:22 am rating: 90

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#23 RA

“But seriously…” LOL

Apr 28, 2010 at 2:13 am rating: 90

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#24 TheOldSchool

When one receptacle is already filled, why not just just use the one on the other side?

Not to be holier than thou, but God has provided us with more than one repository.

Apr 28, 2010 at 3:22 am rating: 90

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- #24.1 Splint Chesthair
  
  Well, la-di-da, looky who’s got the money to have TWO trash buckets in the house.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 6:45 am rating: 90
- #24.2 Woman on the Verge
  
  Um… Splint? TOS wasn’t talking trash cans there.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 7:37 am rating: 90
- #24.3 infant tyrone
  
  trash can : commode :: vagina : ?
  
  Mr. TOS, is that one gonna be on the final ?
  Could we get extra credit if we wrote a compare and contrast
  essay with trash can and vagina ?
  Wasn’t that the bell ?
  Jeez, when’s lunch ?
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 11:31 am rating: 90
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#25 Splint Chesthair

I know, “trash bucket” is my pet name for my wife.

/not really, misinterpreted.

Apr 28, 2010 at 8:09 am rating: 90

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- #25.1 Woman on the Verge
  
  And you failed to gigglebrax. Not your day, is it?
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 8:35 am rating: 90
- #25.2 gavin
  
  I prefer spunk bin ;)… and I would hate to have to look at her vagina; do people really actually look down?
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 8:44 am rating: 90
- #25.3 park rose
  
  So you get, but don’t give, huh, gavin?
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 4:50 pm rating: 90
- #25.4 mamason
  
  Is that why papa calls me spunky?
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 6:06 pm rating: 90
- #25.5 infant tyrone
  
  rose,
  Maybe a hemispheric slang differential at work here, but I’m pretty sure Gavin means to say he gives, but doesn’t get, as he leaves the getting to his colleagues/neighbors down the hall, Mrs. & Mr. Felch, who then join him (Gav) in a little snowballing, even, curiously, on long hot summer nights.
  
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gwHqb-3ATk
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 6:33 pm rating: 90
- #25.6 park rose
  
  So he goes down then ty? Sorry, I misunderstood.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 11:50 pm rating: 90
- #25.7 TheOldSchool
  
  Some of these contemporary pet names for a loved ones vagina strike me as being a bit sexist.
  
  Call me romantic, but if I’m having it off with someone special, I refer to her pussy as “my little cum bucket.”
  
  If I’m not, it’s just an “axe wound.”
  
  The use of demeaning or crudely phrased anatomical terms is not only hurtful, but also unnecessary.
  
  Apr 29, 2010 at 1:40 am rating: 90
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#26 Pterosaur

“I’m not petty” = “I’m about to say something terribly petty, rude, or otherwise offensive.” See also: “No offense,” “With all due respect,” and “I don’t mean that in a bad way.”

Apr 28, 2010 at 8:36 am rating: 90

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#27 Bunnee

Well, if her vag looks anything like that dry erase board, it has razor stubble….

Apr 28, 2010 at 9:34 am rating: 90

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#28 Monzo Matic

iadies? What’s that? Because she has written in CAPS that is not a capital L.

I like the consistency of caps and lower case.

Apr 28, 2010 at 9:40 am rating: 90

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#29 matt

I could easily say “stop using a BLOODY RED MARKER ALREADY and use a CLEAN whiteboard – DIRTY whiteboards make me OCD” but I won’t – but seriously..

and the <3 Ross thing, that's a subliminal message to the ladies to meet "Ross" for some personal trash removal during lunch break in the walk-in stationary cupboard

Apr 28, 2010 at 9:47 am rating: 90

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#30 Edwina the Defrocked Nun

GAG! when I reached the penultimate line.

Apr 28, 2010 at 4:04 pm rating: 90

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#31 aaa

Asking people to empty a trash can they fill isn’t petty, but writing a passive aggressive note is.

Apr 28, 2010 at 4:36 pm rating: 90

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- #31.1 oi
  
  Seriously aaa? did I ever know that?!
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 4:47 pm rating: 90
- #31.2 aaa
  
  I AM FULL OF SERIOUS. THE INTERNET IS SERIOUS BUSINESS.
  
  Apr 28, 2010 at 9:38 pm rating: 90
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#32 infanttyrone

For any re-visitors who haven’t lost your appetite or sense of humor…

http://www.buzzfeed.com/scott/vagina-cupcakes

Kinda like snowflakes ?

Apr 29, 2010 at 10:24 am rating: 90

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#33 Leslie

I read this as a garbage can full of used condoms, but that might just be because my friend has the same problem with her roommate…

May 1, 2010 at 12:26 pm rating: 90

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#34 Rebecca

IS there such a thing as an attractive vagina? I mean, one you really really want to see and you can’t help but say, “Wow! That’s a cute vagina! It’s not gross at all!”

May 1, 2010 at 9:13 pm rating: 90

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- #34.1 dave
  
  So are you a straight woman then? can I have your number? I always utter those words when I see one.
  I can prove it to you.. Can I have your number?
  
  May 1, 2010 at 10:23 pm rating: 90
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#35 Why can't we stop leaving each other bitchy notes on the whiteboard? | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

[...] looking to improve your relationships with your roommates, communicating through the erasable whiteboard might not be the most effective way to [...]

Jun 29, 2010 at 5:05 pm rating: 90

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