Writes Stacey in Massachusetts: “The church around the corner from my house is famous for the little rants on their sign, but this one definitely takes the cake.” Obviously, texting while driving isn’t cool, but as Stacey put it: “For a church, it just seems a bit…hostile.”
Meanwhile, I just opened up the August issue of Texas Monthly to see this slightly more gently worded version…
related: Sincerely, God
extra credit: Church sign generator
49 responses so far ↓
#1
paranoidasteroid
Ha! A church near where I work in VA has a similar sign: “Honk if you love Jesus, Text if you want to meet him.”
Maybe it’s the new Christian cause, instead of protesting gay marriage, they’ll protest unsafe driving.
Jul 24, 2011 at 5:38 pm rating: 90
#2
Quite Contrary
I take it the church would also frown on drunk texting.
Jul 24, 2011 at 5:44 pm rating: 90
#3
shwo!
WTFBBQWWJD!
Jul 24, 2011 at 5:54 pm rating: 90
#4
Kay
Jesus takes text messages? But only those in motion. Hmm. Religious tales get more entertaining all the time.
Jul 24, 2011 at 6:14 pm rating: 90
#5
homemom
I know that church (grew up not far from there) and I also have seen one in VA , where I now live, on rte 28 that has the same sign. There is actually a publication that churches get their signs quotes from.
Jul 24, 2011 at 6:16 pm rating: 90
#6
Valentine
If the sign said
“All is well.”
Love,
Jesus
There would still be a bunch of whining about Christians. Geez. Get a life.
Jul 24, 2011 at 6:40 pm rating: 90
#7
Jenn
I think its funny. I’ve seen it before elsewhere. It makes a good point too, texting while driving is dangerous. Many people, regardless of faith, are smart enough to realize that. Bashing Christians for showing some humor while reminding people to be safe should be considered politically incorrect.
Jul 24, 2011 at 7:11 pm rating: 90
#8
ClearlyDemented
I’d never text and drive, but I’ve caught myself swerving while trying to read small-text signs like this on the side of the road.
Jul 24, 2011 at 8:38 pm rating: 90
#9
Sensible Madness
This is nonsense. How am I supposed to meet Jesus by texting and driving? I don’t know his phone number or address!
Jul 24, 2011 at 9:54 pm rating: 90
#10
Mrs.Beasley
I like it!
Jul 24, 2011 at 11:07 pm rating: 90
#11
Malice
I fail to see how this is hostile. At all.
A church advising people against the dangers of texting while driving while still maintaining a light-hearted humor? HOW DARE THEY! These crazy Christians want people to stop endangering their lives and the lives of others by not paying attention to the road while driving. The fiends!
Jul 24, 2011 at 11:09 pm rating: 90
#12
Adriana
Sue me, but I think it’s funny.
Jul 24, 2011 at 11:34 pm rating: 90
#13
Canthz_B
Luckily, when Christians drink in church they can drive afterwards. There’s no DUI law on the books against drinking blood.
In fact, if I’m ever stopped drunk driving and the arresting officer testifies that my speech was slurred, I’m going to assert that I was merely driving while catching the Holy Ghost and was speaking in tongues.
Jul 24, 2011 at 11:42 pm rating: 90
#14
Laua
That phrase has been around for at least a year–I’ve seen it on signs around Houston (natch) a bunch of times.
Jul 24, 2011 at 11:55 pm rating: 90
#15
Grant
One could always read the Bible whilst driving instead.
Jul 25, 2011 at 4:50 am rating: 90
#16
Canthz_B
Most good books spawn sequels. The Bible being THE Good Book should do the same.
Somewhere in the sequel there will be The Book of Technologies which lists certain Commandments, among them:
Thou shalt not text while driving.
Thou shalt not talk on ones cell phone while being helped by a cashier.
Thou shalt not use the speakerphone feature in public.
But first among these shall be:
Thou shalt not force ones private life upon the ears of strangers who’d rather not hear about it.
Jul 25, 2011 at 9:54 am rating: 90
#17
Slap Stick
Glad they are taking a break from wasting all of their sheep’s (optional) required donations to make a joke.
Jul 25, 2011 at 10:20 am rating: 90
#18
Me
C’mon people, lighten up! It’s funny!
Jul 25, 2011 at 11:44 am rating: 90
#19
Army of Words
Definitely seen this before, but worded differently, like the church Paranoid mentioned. Fortunately, this is one of the less hostile notes I’ve seen on Church signs. Most of the ones I’ve seen just point out the different ways you can go to hell.
Jul 25, 2011 at 11:52 am rating: 90
#20
ArikaM
Ha ha. And by the way, God Bless You.
Jul 25, 2011 at 1:55 pm rating: 90
#21
Allie
Doesn’t make sense. They claim Jesus is supposed to be a living presence in your life once you accept him into your heart, so why would I have to die to meet him? Also, I can’t stand self-righteous indignation. Jesus? Great guy; can’t stand his entourage.
Jul 25, 2011 at 3:47 pm rating: 90
#22
Delurks
I’ve seen this joke on church signs before, but phrased more like the second sign depicted. The first church may have changed the phrasing because they didn’t have enough marquee letters or something, but if it weren’t on a church sign, it could actually come across as anti-Christian: “Yeah, great, if you love Jesus so much, why don’t you text while driving and go meet him right now!”
Of course it’ s only meant to be funny in the first place, but the clunky wording kind of makes it funnier.
Jul 25, 2011 at 7:39 pm rating: 90
#23
Canthz_B
Vegans don’t text to anyone with a face while driving, so I won’t text while driving to a steakhouse.
That’s about as good a compromise I can offer.
Jul 26, 2011 at 12:23 am rating: 90
#24
Jessica_Iowa
This church near my house had the same thing about sending texts while driving. However that is not the best one this church posted. Once it’s sign said:
“Don’t let stress kill you let the church help.”
Jul 26, 2011 at 4:04 pm rating: 90
#25
XE
Well, at least the sign implies that the texter would get into heaven, dunnit? Guess they like them after all!
Sep 5, 2011 at 8:08 am rating: 90
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