Well, lookie here: this office in Florida has a “Jeff” of their own!
related: A citation from the fat police; Sprinkles are for cupcakes
FILED UNDER: cake · food · hey fatty · office · questionable logic
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85 responses so far ↓
#1
kjordan
I don’t know…it having coconut on it wouldn’t make me too happy…
Aug 31, 2011 at 4:45 pm rating: 90
#2
clever name
Jeeze, don’t have one then tubby. People that understand moderation will have one…
Aug 31, 2011 at 4:52 pm rating: 90
#3
misspiggy
Noo!! That is possibly the meanest, cruellest PAN I have ever seen. I blame Puritan culture – after all, these are the people who banned Christmas before we kicked them out of the UK….
It’s not even correct – just because cupcakes (can) make us fat doesn’t mean they don’t make us happy in the process!
Aug 31, 2011 at 5:16 pm rating: 90
#4
vanessa
Oh FFS ONE cupcake will not do it. One hundred maybe. Unless you reallllyy stretch em out.
Aug 31, 2011 at 5:32 pm rating: 90
#5
Gene Roseberry
Not. Mutually. Exclusive.
Aug 31, 2011 at 5:33 pm rating: 90
#6
Delfin Joaquin Paris III
Cupcakes make people fart. Fart like crazy. Like, insane farting. Farting that could end a war.
Or, maybe that’s just me and my IBS.
Aug 31, 2011 at 5:42 pm rating: 90
#7
Adriana
Holy crap. Just let people enjoy their lives. It’s a freaking cupcake, not poison.
Aug 31, 2011 at 6:06 pm rating: 90
#8
Dr_Know
Wow these people policing other people’s choices…I just don’t get them.
I bet if someone had brought in a cheese platter they wouldn’t have said anything…but hey here’s some news – eating too much of pretty much anything can make you gain weight.
But who gives a crap…no one has the right to tell anyone else to what to do or not do (unless their hurting others) and as Gene so kindly pointed out – it’s very possible to be fat and happy.
Aug 31, 2011 at 6:18 pm rating: 90
#9
berge
Dammit, now I want a cupcake.
Aug 31, 2011 at 6:20 pm rating: 90
#10
Oh Geeee
He’s just hoping to dissuade his coworkers from taking them… More for him (or her).
Aug 31, 2011 at 6:39 pm rating: 90
#11
Melissa
Sedentary office jobs make people fat. So you should leave.
Aug 31, 2011 at 6:40 pm rating: 90
#12
@jaredmorgs
Well based on the fact two cupcakes have been eaten, we can deduce that two people are happy at least. And perhaps a little bit fatter. But probably more happier than fatter.
Aug 31, 2011 at 7:24 pm rating: 90
#13
Chrys
Well I’ve put on about 10 pounds so I’ve been cutting back on the junk and carbs in general, but I’d gladly set myself back a day for some raspberry coconut happiness, that sounds like an amazing combo and I don’t know why I’ve never tried it.
Aug 31, 2011 at 8:41 pm rating: 90
#14
Pit Pat
Team Zinger Cupcakes!
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:18 pm rating: 90
#15
Quite Contrary
Frankly, I hope whoever took the cupcake(s) walks on top of the car like Rachel Bilson in that ice cream commercial. (Thanks, James L!)
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:22 pm rating: 90
#16
Danny
Anonymous Post-It notes make people obnoxious assholes.
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:39 pm rating: 90
#17
Tiffany
Apparently, *not* eating cupcakes makes people bitchy.
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:39 pm rating: 90
#18
Deirdre
I’d leave a note saying, “Way to try and tempt me to commit suicide. Jerks and your sugar. Diabetics hate having your yummy, scrumptious, delicious, icing-coating, heavenly …. wait, what was I talking about?… “
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:41 pm rating: 90
#19
KST
I would find out who wrote that note and smear cupcake and icing all over their desk, then leave the wrappers in their trash can and put a little sign that says “oink oink” on their monitor.
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:46 pm rating: 90
#20
E.R.A. Triano (@lizziewriter)
aw, maybe the writer was trying to diet and just wrote that to help his or herself stay away from the cupcakes.
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:50 pm rating: 90
#21
Katie Bourke
Someones on the bitter diet.
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:51 pm rating: 90
#22
Kate
I’m fat and happy. *eats all the cupcakes* There. YOU’RE WELCOME.
Aug 31, 2011 at 9:53 pm rating: 90
#23
Divvitar
So, all I have to do to lose weight is not eat cupcakes? Wow! I would never have guessed!
Aug 31, 2011 at 10:11 pm rating: 90
#24
Zinnia
My response note would have been, “I’ll eat only one cupcake if you agree to use only one exclamation point.”
Aug 31, 2011 at 10:38 pm rating: 90
#25
kat
I would totally write a note like that. The fat ppl in my office smell. They don’t need anymore cuppycakes…or takeout chinese…or pizza…or bacon egg & cheese EVERY morning. Srsly – they smell.
Aug 31, 2011 at 11:19 pm rating: 90
#26
boxes
All it takes is one little line and that note becomes “No! Cupcakes make people EAT”
Because they do. Nom nom nom delicious cupcakes.
Aug 31, 2011 at 11:40 pm rating: 90
#27
Joe
After seeing some of the disgusting masses of flesh in some of the offices I’ve worked in, and the way they would stuff their faces whenever someone brought (always incredibly fattening) food in, I would’ve laughed my ass off if someone put this note up. Team asshole PAN leaver all the way!
Aug 31, 2011 at 11:57 pm rating: 90
#28
havingfitz
I have joked for years that as long as cupcakes exist, I will never lose weight. They are my ultimate weakness. Notice I said “my weakness”. I’m overweight because I choose to eat the wrong things. Unless I’m sitting on you, go munch your carrot sticks and leave me in peace.
Sep 1, 2011 at 12:07 am rating: 90
#29
wrench
Gotta admit, I hate it when people bring pastries into the office a month before PT testing. But I’m in the military so being in shape is kind of required. I’m naturally thin but I always PT better when I eat well.
Sep 1, 2011 at 5:18 am rating: 90
#30
Nunavut Guy
Cupcakes don’t make people happy,drugs make people happy!
Drop a couple of 8 balls off at the office next Friday and watch moral soar.
Sep 1, 2011 at 6:12 am rating: 90
#31
Kristi
Cupcakes make people… whip out their inner self-righteous, fun-killing a-hole persona, at least in this guy/gal’s case.
Sep 1, 2011 at 7:42 am rating: 90
#32
Weird Al
Your butt is wide, well mine is too
Just watch your mouth or I’ll sit on you
The word is out, better treat me right
‘Cause I’m the king of cellulite
Ham on, ham on, ham on whole wheat, all right
My zippers bust, my buckles break
I’m too much man for you to take
The pavement cracks when I fall down
I’ve got more chins than Chinatown
Well, I’ve never used a phone booth
And I’ve never seen my toes
When I’m goin’ to the movies
I take up seven rows
Because I’m fat, I’m fat, come on
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, come on you know
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
Don’t you call me pudgy, portly or stout
Just now tell me once again who’s fat
When I walk out to get my mail
It measures on the Richter scale
Down at the beach I’m a lucky man
I’m the only one who gets a tan
If I have one more pie a la mode
I’m gonna need my own zip code
When you’re only having seconds
I’m having twenty-thirds
When I go to get my shoes shined
I gotta take their word
Because I’m fat, I’m fat, sha mone
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, you know it you know
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
And my shadow weighs forty-two pounds
Lemme tell you once again who’s fat
If you see me comin’ your way
Better give me plenty space
If I tell you that I’m hungry
Then won’t you feed my face
Because I’m fat, I’m fat, sha mone
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, you know it, you know
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
Woo woo woo, when I sit around the house
I really sit around the house
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, come on
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, you know it, you know it
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know, you know, you know, come on
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
And you know all by myself I’m a crowd
Lemme tell you once again
You know I’m huge, I’m fat, you know it
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, you know, hoo
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
You know I’m fat, I’m fat, you know it, you know
(Fat, fat, really really fat)
And the whole world knows I’m fat and I’m proud
Just tell me once again who’s fat
Sep 1, 2011 at 9:15 am rating: 90
#33
divaandwriter
Raspberry coconut only? No chocolate?
Sep 1, 2011 at 9:23 am rating: 90
#34
This or That
Wait – something is wrong here. Where’s the “that cupcake was f*cking delicious” guy?
Sep 1, 2011 at 9:32 am rating: 90
#35
RP
Stop feeding the trolls, people!
They clearly don’t want to be feed anything for fear of getting fat anyway.
Sep 1, 2011 at 9:42 am rating: 90
#36
Hellbound Alleee
Fat or happy? The two are definitely NOT mutually exclusive.
Sep 1, 2011 at 10:41 am rating: 90
#37
Zorin
As long as they’re not Pinkie’s cupcakes…
Sep 1, 2011 at 11:36 am rating: 90
#38
JenStar
I know had I seen it in my office, I’d have an overwhelming urge to write, “Your Mom is fat” on the sticky note in response.
Don’t be hatin’ on cuppie cakes.
Sep 1, 2011 at 12:00 pm rating: 90
#39
HAHA
No you idiot. EATING cupcakes makes you fat. The cupcakes themselves have no power. Bet this person is a fatty.
Sep 1, 2011 at 2:33 pm rating: 90
#40
SkinnyBish
Yeesh, what a hater! I mean, yeah, eating the whole box of cupcakes and sitting on your a** all day, every day, WILL inevitably lead to undesirable personal growth (unless the person in question has the metabolism of a hummingbird). One cupcake – maybe two, if it’s your birthday and the calories don’t count anyway – will not, in and of itself, make anyone fat.
Stick it to the diet police!
Sep 1, 2011 at 3:50 pm rating: 90
#41
Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff
I thought fat people were supposed to be jolly.
Sep 2, 2011 at 7:33 am rating: 90
#42
notolaf
Cupcakes don’t make people fat. People make people fat.
Sep 3, 2011 at 4:04 pm rating: 90
#43
neeners
Is this another one of the “gourmet” cupcake crowd who charge 5.95 per cupcake?
Sep 3, 2011 at 9:52 pm rating: 90
#44
Caity
So does this mean more for me if letter-writer doesn’t want one?
Sep 4, 2011 at 10:58 pm rating: 90
#45
Lois Lola Lala
If one cupcake makes your a$$ fat then you need to hit the gym, because their is no way one special occasion snack will bloat a healthy person getting enough excercise. Sound like the note writer needs to get a personal trainer if one cupcake scares them that much.
Sep 10, 2011 at 12:23 pm rating: 90
#46
pearl
Oh, for…
Look, Fitness Junkies. Some of us would rather be happy than make ourselves miserable swimming upstream. You go on about your masochism and leave us terrible fatties alone.
Leave us to our happy-inducing cupcakes. As others have said, one cupcake isn’t going to blow your figure completely if you get enough exercise. So GET OVER IT.
Sep 13, 2011 at 10:15 pm rating: 90
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