So if you know anyone who cares about their pets…

July 25th, 2012 · 449 comments

Here’s how Connie explains the situation: “I’m selling my house and moving to a new town. I’ve had an outdoor cat for almost five years, and she doesn’t do well indoors. Since it looks like I’ll end up in an apartment for the first year, I’m trying to find a new home for her. I made the mistake of asking a coworker who is passionate about his pets — seriously, he loves them more than people — and I thought he was just having a little fun with me when he bashed me for ‘throwing her away.’ I laughed and just told him to ask around and let me know.”

Here’s how Connie’s coworker chose to do that:

Connie is abandoning her pet cat even though it was a very loyal pet many years and its probably going to end up on a shelter.    So if you know anyone who cares about their pets and has room for one more, please let her know.  Thanks,  Brian

related: Sorry, my friends don’t eat cat.

extra credit: The saga of the passive-aggressive “lost cat” poster 

FILED UNDER: cats · e-mail · frenemies · guilt trip · self-righteous vegans · South Carolina

449 responses so far ↓

  • #1   LOL

    Your cat “doesn’t do well indoors”??? Sounds like a BS excuse to me too Brian.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   mystic_eye

      Yeah, I used to think that, then I got a cat that “Oh no, she’s an indoor cat, well we let her out once in a blue moon, only in the summer”.

      I gave up after 8 months of a crying miserable cat that would not move from the top of my dresser except to pee up and down the hall.

      She’s back to being allowed out where she basically sits on the porch, occasionally goes to the sidewalk to let the local kids pet her, or sleeps under the bush.

      It’s easy to assume that other people are lazy and it would be different if it were you, it’s not you. If that cat would be miserable then find a better place for it, it’s not the same as leaving it on the side of the road.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   katfriend

      However, you can’t guarantee that the next person who has it is looking for an “outdoor” cat. I’m sorry but this sounds like a lame excuse to get rid of an animal. Team note writer!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.3   Poltergeist

      Actually, you can guarantee it by informing them that it’s an outdoor cat before you give it to them! If they don’t want an outdoor cat, they’ll decline the offer! Common sense goes a long way.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.4   MenaBean

      Some cats really don’t do well with changes like that. When I moved out, I took my cat with me. She was *miserable*. She cried all the time, shredded anything paper she could get her claws into, and tried to get outside any time the door opened. Luckily, I was able to take her back to my parents, where she is happily living now.

      If a cat is used to being able to go outside at will, suddenly being stuck in a tiny apartment is miserable.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.5   deprogrammed

      Apparently you’ve never been owned by a cat.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.6   minna

      I’m moving to a new town, and my child doesn’t do well going to new schools.

      Can you ask around to see if anyone wants her before I take her to the orphanage?

      Gues what – you can EVEN let an apartment cat outside, if you want to.

      It IS bullshit.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.7   Will

      Aw, for crap’s sake. Children != Pets.

      The person can’t take her cat and is trying to find a loving home for it. How awful! She must be a MONSTER!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.8   Vulpis

      @minna *Holds up mangled roadkill* “Hey lady, is this your cat? You really shouldn’t be letting it run around in a place with this much traffic.”

      The situation very much depends on just how tiny the new apartment is, and the kind of location it’s in.

      Talk about your no-win scenario–if they keep the cat and live somewhere unsuitable for them, they get called a monster. If they are aware of this problem and try to make sure the cat gets a comfortable home (rather than sending it to a shelter where it’s likely to be euthanized–epsecially if it a PETA one–or throwing it out on the roadside), they get called a monster anyway.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.9   Dr_Know

      How about walking the “outdoor” cat that has to adapt to live in an apartment.

      TBH it should never have been an outdoor cat what with the danger to native wildlife!

      Jul 27, 2012 at 10:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.10   Maezeppa

      In many states, Cats aren’t even regarded as being ‘owned’ or ‘property’ because of their roaming nature.

      In any case, if a cat comes to my door and I feed it, it doesn’t make the cat my responsiblity when I move away.

      She is doing the right thing – finding a new caregiver for the cat.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 11:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.11   JoDa

      Yeah, my sister “rescued” two stray, probably feral, kittens. They were, at most, 8 weeks old when she took them in. They HATE being in the house, 2 YEARS later. I suppose their life is better than it would have been, but they’re certainly *not* happy, sociable kitties. At least she’s taking the step of finding a good, responsible home for the cat. My dog is a rescue whose owner could no longer take care of him, and I do agree that it’s kind of like responsibly putting a child up for adoption. If you *know* you can’t do it, and you find a trusted person or rescue to take the animal in, you’re doing it right.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 3:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   Kate

    Good for him. Too many people think pets are disposable and not lifetime commitments.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Vulpis

      Part of that comittment is realizing that some living situations are not appropriate for taking care of some kinds of pets. If this person thought they were disposable, they *would* be just dumping them off at a shelter rather than trying to find a good home. The note-writer’s an a**. Or are you saying that the OP shouldn’t be allowed to move because of their cat?

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   CoolSmithy

      Y’knoooow I love my cats so much I get made fun of it for it -constantly- (in other words, I do not at all think they are disposable), but I think is a case of someone just being responsible and considering what’s best for their pet. I wouldn’t give up my cat, but I wouldn’t begrudge someone who did it with their pet’s best interests in mind.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 2:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   H for Toy

    Let the indoor/outdoor cat carnage begin!

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Tesselara

      H for Toy, word. Welcome to America, where everyone knows exactly how to run everyone else’s life. Pets and parenting. The dreaded duo. We’ve lost sight of the difference between “bad” parents and “bad” pet owners, and “less than ideal” parents and pet owners. Let’s seek some clarity: Bad=kills, mutilates, neglects or irresponsibly abandons. Less than ideal= doesn’t work a little harder to find the best solution, but finds solutions that will not kill, mutilate, neglect or irresponsibly abandon.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 6:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   Gwan

      Yeah, it’s weird. Growing up in NZ, where most people have a backyard and there aren’t coyotes etc., everyone I knew had indoor/outdoor cats that came and went. Then I come to France and it took me a while to get used to the idea that keeping a cat inside all day in an apartment wasn’t cruel, only to find some people claiming that letting your cat go outside is the irresponsible thing! Different strokes for different cats/environments/cultures, I suppose.

      However, my current cat literally was abandoned by a neighbour who claimed it was because it wasn’t an indoor cat and she couldn’t take it when she moved. I felt sorry for him and gave him a go in my apartment and whaddaya know, he adjusted. I do still sometimes have twinges of conscience about keeping him cooped up all day long, but I’m guessing he prefers it to starving in the neighbours’ backyard like he was.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.3   NOOOOO!

      It’s interesting, when my mom got her cats from the local SPCA they told her, and she had to sign a contract to the effect, that the cats would be indoor-only, that she could have them taken from her if they went out. My stepmom is a cat vet and her cats are inside/outside. There seems to not be much agreeing on this…

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:48 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.4   twhit

      Our local SPCA will not adopt a cat out to a home with a child under 6 for the safety of the cat and the child. While I won’t deny that they do some good work, they are oddly militant about some things.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.5   Jessi

      @NOOOOO!, vets are animal physicians, not animal behaviorists. Taking behavioral advice from a vet is like taking psychological advice from your regular doctor.

      As an example, the senior vet where I work wholeheartedly recommends shock collars on dogs as young as 12 weeks old, and suggests stepping on the back paws of a dog to keep it from jumping up.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 2:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.6   Ugh

      No, vet do go through behavior training in vet school… You should be able to ask your vet questions about animal behavior. True, there are board certified vet behaviorists for difficult cases, but for simple questions, vets are more than capable of answering them. However, the vet you work for sounds like an asshole and I wouldn’t seek ANY advice from him, medical or behavioral!

      Jul 29, 2012 at 7:24 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.7   Trainer

      Yes, most vets are required to take a behavior course. However, to get an in-depth and effective answer to a behavioral question, skip the vets or vet behaviorists and go straight to an ACAAB or CAAB who has done graduate work in behavior and ethology. Anyone can call themselves a “behaviorist” because the title isn’t restricted like the title “doctor.” I wouldn’t ask my general practice doctor for psychiatric advice, and I wouldn’t ask my vet about my dog’s barrier frustration.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 9:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.8   Jessi

      @Ugh, I don’t work for a vet. There’s a vet where I work. Also, the senior vet is a she.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 2:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   Sheryl Kenville- Charboneau

    What a piece of garbage that woman is…Throwing away her Baby because it is not convenient to have the Cat anymore
    My wish for her is when she is old and in the way someone does the same to her

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Molly Musaka

      Um, I agree she’s bullshitting and probably just doesn’t want the cat anymore, but let’s not get irrational. It’s not a baby, it’s a cat.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 10:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   sherriffx

      Sheryl Kenville-Charboneau, judging from your interactions with your fellow commenters you are either a troll or not a very pleasant human being. what right do you have to wish abandonment and loneliness on another human being. Sure, I agree that having to give up her pet isn’t an ideal solution but there are far less humane things she could do than try to find a nice home for her pet. And shame on the nine people who liked your comment.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.3   Suntherian

      …God forbid she do something right by the animal and try and find it a home where it can be comfortable, healthy, and happy instead of forcing it to suffer out of some excessive NEED to have the animal. Sheesh.
      And, seriously, I’m PRETTY sure the cat won’t care who gives it its’ next meal, so long as it gets one.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.4   Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      What the fuck is wrong with you people? It’s a cat! It won’t even remember who she is or where it used to live. They’ve only got 200million neurons in their cerebral cortex; they’re just not capable of actual thought. Within a few days in its new home it won’t even remember that it hasn’t lived there all its life.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.5   Lily11

      I love cats…but SERIOUSLY? Garbage?

      Jul 26, 2012 at 6:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.6   largeanimalvet

      cat does not equal baby

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:26 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.7   nick17

      My best cat was a neighborhood stray who adopted me shortly after I moved in to my current house. Turns out the previous owners moved to a new house, a couple blocks up the street. The cat preferred to stay in her old territory, and kept hanging around their old house. Cats are generally not loyal to people, and I’m sure she didn’t “miss” her old family. She seemed content to prowl around the block she was familiar with. Suntherian is right, the cat won’t care as long as she’s being fed.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.8   Kimberly

      I don’t know, I have one cat that would accept anyone that wants to pet her but I genuinely think that the other one believes that he is my human child and would be devastated if he went to a new home.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.9   Kes

      Some pets get more attached than others. They might be *just* cats (or dogs, rabbits, sheep, chickens) but some really care for their owners. Or other pets.

      I had to leave behind my cat and my dog when I changed cities for University and my pets didn’t care much, they had each other. But my dog died. My cat became depressed and mourned my dog. Until my father got another cat. Now they like my father more than me.

      But I borrowed a rabbit and he was pretty happy with us. When we gave him back (grudgingly, we really liked him), he became depressed at first, then destructive and aggressive. They didn’t told us until it was too late: it had already bitten all the kids in the house and they decided to cook him )-: If they had told us, we would have taken him back.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:21 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.10   Vulpis

      In that case, I hope when *you* get old, your family keeps you cooped up in a tiny little room in an apartment that’s barely large enough for the family rather than putting you in a facility that can give you proper care.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.11   Brigitte

      People do that to babies too, BTW. We like to call it “adoption.”

      Jul 28, 2012 at 10:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.12   Splash

      Your choice of when to capitalize and when not to is intriguing to me . Also, the owner is doing what’s best for her cat. Who are you to judge some on else and their life choices? Are you her? Are you her cat? Do you have some weird surveillance system that allows you some advantage over the rest of the world in concerns of this woman and her personal life (if so, gross, and shame on you!)? No? Then STFU and stop judging her. By the way, it says a lot about the kind of person you are, to wish someone ill based off of them trying to do what is best for their pet.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 11:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.13   Kirst

      It’s not her baby. It’s her cat. Cats are not human.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 11:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   H for Toy

    Seriously? It’s a cat. It’s not your child, or your aging grandmother. If she really didn’t care, she wouldn’t bother trying to find it a home. She’s just send it outside and move while it wasn’t looking.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Sheryl Kenville- Charboneau

      What a loser

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.2   Jami

      Pets are family. She should’ve been keeping the cat indoors from the start. If only because coyotes love to kill and eat people’s pets.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.3   Susan

      Clearly we all live in the US. Let me tell you of the huge coyote problem in Northern Europe.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.4   Greendragon00

      Nevermind the bloody cat. What about all the birds it has been killing? Go Team Coyote!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.5   Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Cats live outdoors. That’s the way things are, and it’s the way things ought to be too. Birds can fly, so it’s not like they don’t have a sporting chance.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.6   mystic_eye

      Yes let’s make the coyotes eat puppy chow (which is clearly not made from animals) and let all the birds live until old age because *clearly* with each bird pair having multiple babies each year they would never, ever, ever run out of food.

      Sheesh. Sure domesticated cats aren’t part of the “natural food chain” neither are: gardens, houses, birdfeeders, sidewalks, stupid bloody decorative fruit trees from other countries that no local species will eat, or pretty much anything at all within city limits.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:43 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.7   Vulpis

      #5.1 Yes, yes you are.

      #5.3 Heck with that. Apparently I’m missing the big coyote problem in the US, since I haven’t seen one outside of a zoo in 40 years, even when I *was* owned by a cat.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:21 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.8   kaja

      Um, I live in St. Louis and we have coyotes everywhere. The US is a big place; just because I haven’t seen an alligator outside of the zoo doesn’t mean there aren’t parts of the country where they’re a nuisance.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 6:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.9   H for Toy


      Point #1 :)

      Point #2, it actually is a problem in some areas. There was a place in Central PA where the coyotes got so bad, they were coming into town and taking groceries out of people’s hands in the store parking lot. There may be natural predators in other areas of the country, but not around here, apparently.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 6:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.10   Jessi

      Vulpis, Coyotes are sneaky. Just because you don’t see them, it doesn’t mean they aren’t there.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 2:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   Kelsey

    Yeah, I gotta say, as someone who works for the Humane Society & sees hundreds upon hundreds of unwanted pets dumped at our local shelter each year, I have to side with Brian. It was petty & unprofessional of him to send out that email BUT how many times has a cat or dog been dumped off because the owner was moving & the new place didn’t allow pets? Pets are family (or should be) & moving or having a baby or deciding you’re to lazy to look after the pet anymore – none of those are good reasons to dump it. Brian is correct, the cat will probably end up at a shelter or it will get hit by a car, since it’s allowed to run around outside freely as it is.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   cocoa.chica

      I don’t think any of your are reading the post correctly. The cat doesn’t do well indoors, and would most likely be miserable. Much better to find a house where the cat can be kept outdoors.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.2   ArgyleEnigma

      Actually, all of those save the last are fantastic reasons to “dump” a pet. Surely you don’t really believe some0ne needs to refuse a job offer because they cannot bring their cat? The idea that a responsibility to one’s cat should preclude having or caring for children is utterly preposterous.

      I find myself hoping you are allowed to run around outside freely. By the way, not everyone lives in suburbia, with paved roads near home.

      By the way, tell me again how pets are the same as family after your eleven-year-old son is killed.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.3   Amy

      Cats are not supposed to be kept OUTDOORS. That’s the issue. If she was responsible, she would make it an indoor cat.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.4   Heather

      ArgyleEngima, stop being an overly dramatic c***. There is nothing wrong with loving your pets & being responsible & taking care of them for life. That’s what you’re supposed to do. There is NO good reason to dump a good pet. If the dog has severe mental issues & is dangerous, ok. But getting rid of a dog because you want to have a baby? Why did you get the dog in the first place then? Oh because you were bored at the time. Moving is definitely not a reason to dump a pet. You can always take them with you. It’s just a cop-out excuse when people no longer want to deal with their pets.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.5   Poltergeist

      No, you can’t always take them with you. You’re living in a fairy tale utopia Heather. Join us back here on earth.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.6   Rebecca

      Actually, I would say of those reasons, the last is the only somewhat legitimate one. At least it’s honest. If you truly are too lazy to care for a pet, it may be better off being rehomed.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.7   Jami

      I would turn down a job if it meant abandoning my dog. She’s family, period.

      The only reason to abandon a pet is because you are physically incapable of caring for them anymore. Anything else is pure selfishness.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.8   strangelove bang

      I’ve TRIED to explain to my companion cat that he’s NOT SUPPOSED to be “kept” (i.e. even allowed) outside, ever. Mr. Tibbs Cat strenuously disagrees. We are at a negotiating standstill, and I hear lately that Mr. Tibbs not only has sought high-profile outside council but may be launching a facebook protest. My fear these days is not the backlash I’ll undoubtably receive, especially should I sever our bond and “dump” him (god forbid, it’s a horrible term. Break-ups are ugly), but what terrors he’ll further wreck upon me for “not allowing his true nature by keeping [him] improperly confined & cruelly constricted within the suffocating cage of our apartment” (his words, not mine). I’ve tried to do right by him, always. I hope he some day believes that.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.9   Susan

      She was looking for a new home for her cat, not dumping it on the humane society, you moron.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.10   Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      I would suggest that the indoor cat people try spending all day, every day indoors without ever going outside ever – but I’ve got a feeling that many of them already live like that.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.11   The Elf

      Some cats don’t do well indoors, especially a feral who has learned to tolerate humans. But has the cat owner really ever tried? It might work out. And if it doesn’t, she can look into re-homing then.

      The problem is that most prospective cat owners don’t want middle aged cats who live outdoors. Even if Connie found someone willing to take the cat in, the cat will have to get used to an entirely different territory. This will be very difficult for the kitty.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.12   Cooper

      Heather: My m other thought she was infertile until she had me. When she had me, her cat threw a fit and tried to make my life a living hell. She sent my mother a clear message: Me or her.

      Surprisingly,/sarcasmn my mother chose me.

      On the other hand, when I went to college, I jumped through hoops to be able to take my cat and rabbit with me. I was told over and over again that my priorities were messed up.

      But in my situation, my cat and rabbit didn’t really have other options. My cat freaks out if I’m gone for a day. I’m the only one the rabbit is fine with being held by.

      On the other hand, when my grandfather died, my family inherited his two cats. One adored everyone immediately, the other made it very clear he wasn’t going to adjust to us. Within a week, he had run away, and she had settled in.

      Pets are different. They have different needs. Some can handle new owners, some can’t.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.13   katfriend

      If you aren’t going to be able to keep your animal forever, simple DONT GET ONE. How hard it is not get an animal? Hundreds of thousands of cats are euthanized every year because people “have a great excuse” to get rid of them. I’m moving… bla bla bla. You shouldn’t have gotten an animal in the first place if you weren’t going to keep it. Cats are not disposable.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:03 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.14   Amy In Toronto

      It seems this outdoor cat has managed this long without getting hit by traffic.

      The assumption here is that when its current owner moves and leaves it with a new adoptive family who similarly, lets the cat remain outdoors as it seemingly prefers, the cat will suddenly forget how to act while outdoors and run willy-nilly into traffic?

      Not following this logic…

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.15   The Elf

      It’s because the cat, once transplanted to his new outdoor home, has to re-establish territory and learn all over again what is what. Sure, a car is a car, but the cat may have learned that it is okay to cross the street because it is lightly traveled and danger is rare. Move the cat near a busy street and the then time he steps out onto the “safe” street and gets run over.

      Plus there may be other territorial issues, like competing animals. Just because the cat has been safe for 5 years does not mean this safety is assured when everything about the cat’s life changes.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.16   Poltergeist

      Apparently every cat-lover that katfriend knows can see into the future so they can prepare for all the predicaments life will throw at them. You know, things might be pretty stable now and I would love to get a cat, but using my psychic powers I am able to predict that I will be down on my luck within the next 10 years.

      …oh wait, that can happen to anybody. I guess nobody should own pets, then.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.17   minna

      The fuck all does an 11 year old son being killed have to do with relinquishing on a responsibility for a life that you agreed to. Yes, its not a HUMAN life, and therefore unworthy of living. But still, who is talking about dying kids?

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.18   Tatterdemalion

      Until government assistance is available for keeping pets in the home when an individual falls on hard times, treating them as children is not feasible for most people in the United States.

      For children, we have:
      public school
      food stamps
      housing assistance
      sometimes healthcare assistance (in some states)

      …and more.

      And although those programs are kind of shitty compared to the ones in real first world countries, they exist.

      Now imagine if none of those existed, 3/4 of rental housing didn’t allow kids, and family expenses were regarded as luxury for tax/living expense purposes… There would be a hell of a lot of abandoned kids in this country.

      I hate the way rich people threadcrap on every topic related to pets.

      The fact of the matter is, if poor people didn’t keep pets, there would be several times as many animals getting killed in shelters as there are now.

      If you’re so wealthy that you can genuinely, confidently assume you’ll always be able to take care of your pets, even if you get sick or lose your job, then start a grant program for helping poor people take care of their pets. Invest in a pet-friendly, low-income housing development. Put your money where your mouth is.

      If you’re in Europe… then remember that it’s different in the States.

      If you just can’t do math and figure out what the real world is like… then GTFO.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:31 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.19   Ti

      First of all, what’s wrong with laziness? I hear the same thing hurled at women seeking abortions: ‘She’s just lazy!’ Like raising a kid for 18 years is a walk in the park. Fuck that.

      There’s nothing wrong with re-homing a pet–for ANY reason. They’re animals, not people. As long as you’re not leaving them to die or sticking them with abusive owners, you’re in the clear. They’ll get over you as easily as you get over them–if not moreso, because, as aforementioned, they’re animals.

      Also, to everyone saying “Pets are forever”; if everyone subscribed to that theory, 99% of animals that turned up in a shelter would die there. Instead of nice people taking those animals in and giving them a good life for as long as they can, they’ll say to themselves, ‘I can’t make a lifetime commitment to an animal, so I just won’t adopt one.’ And all those animals will go straight to death, without ever having lived or loved, even a little. That is not a better world.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.20   katfriend

      My point was that if you would get rid of your cat because you are moving, you shouldn’t get a cat. Having a pet is not a right, animals are not things. If you ever move, take your animal with you. If you are unwilling to do what it takes to move with an animal (it IS possible), you shouldn’t get one.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 10:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.21   Poltergeist

      Everybody’s situation is different. Your points are way too vague to apply to everybody.

      What if I’m moving because I can no longer afford to stay where I am and, by extension, can no longer afford to care for my cat properly? Rather than giving my pet to somebody with the financial means, I’m supposed hurt us both by keeping it?

      No, it’s not always possible to find a place within your budget in the area that you need to live in that also allows pets.

      Maybe I had my pet, but then I had a child and my child is allergic to my pet or my pet becomes aggressive towards my child. What should I do then – give up my child first?

      Stop these silly generalizations. Adults have to make tough decisions sometimes. It’s obviously not ideal, but it’s most certainly not the same as being a bad pet owner and abandoning your animal.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 11:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.22   Connie

      Well katfriend, when I got my cat, I had no intention of moving. I had planned to raise my son here. I bought a home in a neighborhood I love and in a school district I love. Now that my son is being forced to go to school in an area of town I know to be bad, I have to move. I didn’t choose to move because I’m bored. I am moving so my son can be in a good school district. Poltergeist is right. I could not have forseen this. And furthermore, if you have pets, you don’t know what your situation will be next week or month or year. You could very well find yourself in a position where you must find your pet a different home. If in the end, my cat can come with us, great. If not, we are still going to a better place for my son and giving her a new home. It’s an adjustment either way, just as it is for our son, but it’s the best for both of them. I make no apologies for it. And by the way, I accidentally thumbed-up your comment as I was scrolling to the “add to this thread” button. I would have been more careful there too if I had seen that coming.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 12:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.23   Vulpis

      And at what point is this person ‘dumping’ her cat? Among other things, the OP points out that part of the reason she’s moving into an apartment is because she can’t find a larger place to live–which would you rather have, an owner who *responsibly* tries to find a home where their pet will be happy (and obviously considers the shelter a last resort they’d rather *not* have to use), or a pet that’s totally miserable in a situation unsuitable for it. Or are you saying that they shouldn’t be allowed to move/get a new job/etc because of the pet?

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:26 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.24   katfriend

      I understand what you guys are trying to say, things happen in life to everyone. However, my point is that when getting a pet people need to make a serious commitment. Everyone always thinks they have a great reason for dumping their animal. Most don’t take the care to actually find a loving home for their unwanted animal. Need specifics? The animal shelter in the city where I live has a 2 day turn around for cats. That’s right, a cat turned into a shelter will live for two days before it is euthanized. What is the number one reason for a cat to come into the shelter? The owners have moved.

      The answer? Simple, be a responsible owner. Spay or neuter your cat, make a committment to keep your animal and if you really, truely, honestly cannot cannot take the cat with you, find another home OR don’t get a pet. It is not fair for hundreds of thousands of animals to die each year because you have a “great” excuse for getting rid of it.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.25   Tatterdemalion

      And, again, what about those millions of pet owners who don’t have the certainty that they will be able to stay in their current housing situation?

      Believe it or not, many cats that have already been re-homed out of your shelter are living with people without perfect financial security. Even if you do a background check to see that they are working and have a consistent address… luck can change abruptly.

      Yes, that’s right. Many, many cats are currently living with people who might be forced to change jobs and locations. People whose landlords might choose to sell the place out from under them, or who might be homeowners but get foreclosed on, or who may even have $100,000 in savings but lose it all when they get cancer.

      These things happen all too often in this country. The cruelty that is causing your problems is systemic, not individual. It’s hard to see it, but it’s true.

      And if only people with complete financial security owned cats, then all of those happy cats would have simply died in shelters already, rather than getting to live out some years of a decent life with a caring individual for however long that person can stay afloat in this economy.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 11:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.26   Chris Miller

      There’s a big problem where I live with pets being abandoned. It’s a jerk move, but it’s because we’re having a housing crisis after two years of natural disasters and people literally have to choose between having somewhere to live, ANYWHERE (including garages and campervans), or keeping their pet.

      How many of you “pets are forever” people would honestly choose to be homeless rather than give up a pet? Especially if you have children as well. I know some people would, but all of you?

      Jul 28, 2012 at 1:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.27   Erin

      What about families who have babies who end up being allergic to their pets? I am a cat lover, but when my cousin’s infant son ended up being allergic to their cats, I couldn’t begrudge her giving the cat away. It was a choice between the cat and her baby’s health.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 12:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.28   this or that

      Well OBVIOUSLY, Erin, that person should have FORESEEN this and not have gotten pregnant in the first place. Got a cat? Want to have a baby? Better put that off for the next 10-15 years until the cat passes away. After all, if the baby has allergies, you’re going to have to put it up for adoption. The cat was here first. Priorities people.

      But seriously. I like cats and dogs but they are not people. I don’t understand that mentality. Life throws things at you. Circumstances change. If it is not in the pet’s best interest to be with you anymore because of your circumstances, best to find a new loving home for it. Sure, if you adopt a pet, there is a level of committment involved. You should take care of it to the best of your ability, which sometimes means finding a new place for it to live. The idea that pets are a lifetime committment regardless of circumstances is absurd.

      Aug 7, 2012 at 11:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   Molly Musaka

    I have a cat that doesn’t do well inside too, it’s call a stray I feed. If it doesn’t do well inside, it’s not your cat. I agree it’s probably a BS excuse.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   Susan

      Yeah, better to medicate a cat into submission if it does not want to be an indoor cat. And you call yourself and animal lover. WTF.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.2   JK

      Our vet said psychologically they do better when they’re indoor/outdoor rather than one or the other, but I don’t think it’s really feasible to do that for most folks. I have a cat that would prefer to be outdoors too, but I know it’s not safe. All you have to do is go out and listen to the coyotes. She started off 100% miserable, now probably down to 60-65%. She’s otherwise sweet, no scratching or meanness in her, just gripes constantly. You gotta just make ‘em get past it. She thinks the way to escape the house is through my bedroom closet and constantly goes in it searching for a doorway or window to the outside (trying to get to Narnia one would assume). The good news is I’m slowly but surely breaking her spirit the more she stays indoors. :) One day she’ll go ‘What the heck, I’m stuck here, might as well stop the vocalizing!”

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.3   The Elf

      Four indoor cats, three of which are indoor only and the fourth goes outdoors on a leash. None require medication, all are happy and healthy cats.

      I’m not going to unequivocably say indoor is always better. It isn’t. Too much depends on individual circumstances – the nature of the cat, the nature of the owner, the nature of the area the are in, etc.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.4   Rattus

      We have four cats, three of whom were strays that ended up in our yard, one a pet store rescue. We could possibly have kept the rescue indoors, but not with the other three going in and out, and there was no way we were going to be able to keep three borderline ferals confined. So all four go in and out through the cat flap (magnetic lock) during the day, all four come when they’re called, including the one we took in a month ago, and all four are locked in for the night at around 7:00, with the exception of Lincoln who needs a last wander around the yard before he settles down at 10:00. And there is no way in hell we could keep Lincoln indoors. When we took him in, four years ago, we got him fixed, got him his shots, got him back to health (he’d been out on the streets for at least a year), and kept him in while he recovered. His response to that was throwing himself at the window so hard he cracked it. Our response to that was letting him out.

      Every cat is different, and some, no matter what those who are oblivious to those differences think, some are going to be just dreadfully miserable if you deny them the pleasure of sleeping in the sun on the roof of the shed or a ramble through the shrubberies in search of vermin.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:36 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   JingoPoe

    The email should have been signed,

    self-righteous d-bag

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Sheryl Kenville- Charboneau

      u r the d bag
      Gratefully I do not know you

      Jul 25, 2012 at 10:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.2   JingoPoe

      I am grateful, as well.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.3   quat

      And I hope I never meet you either, Sheryl. You sound awfully judgmental… with the emphasis on the “mental”.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.4   The Elf

      And she can’t spell. Seriously, how hard is it to type out “You are the douchebag!”

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.5   Dee

      “Doesn’t do well indoors” is codespeak for pisses on everything, destroys furniture and/or eats other housepets. Having adopted numerous cats from shelters, I’ve experienced it all. The truly destructive ones went to live in our barn and catcg mice. They seem pretty happy out there when I take them their daily rations.
      Funny how in this country, allowing cats and dogs to roam outdoors is cruel, and keeping hogs and chickens inside is cruel. What a bunch of pretentious, self-righteous douches we’ve become.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   me

    Team coworker. Rehoming without even trying to get the cat used to being indoors… nice.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Actually, yes it is. The cat doesn’t care where it lives so long as it’s safe and well-fed; so if it goes to live with someone else there are literally no losers in this scenario.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.2   The Elf

      Except the cat, who loses a companion and an outdoor territory. The kitty can get over both, though. It’ll just take time.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   birdie84 bang

    Have to agree with Brian on this one… animals are NOT disposable! Pisses me off…

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Even cats have to grow up and leave home eventually.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #10.2   Vulpis

      Which makes it good that the OP is trying to responsible and finding it a good *home*, rather than doing what all too many people do, which is chuck it off at a shelter, or worse, on the roadside someplace.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   Simon

    Team Brian. It won’t be easy to keep the cat indoors, but it is certainly possible for someone who cares enough.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Susan

      Yeah, with medication. How wonderful. Cat not happy, let’s stuff her full of pills so that the human douche who does that can pretend she is happy and not let her outside.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.2   Jessi

      @Susan, actually, they make pheromone collars and diffusers these days which really help with behavioral issues in both dogs and cats. There are also puzzle toys to help keep you cats mind active and stimulated. Also, just like with dogs, cats can get used to being walked on a leash.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.3   Susan

      Keep telling yourself that, maybe then you’d not feel like such a miserable excuse of a pet owner.

      They are living beings, with a will of their own.

      You can guilden their cage with toys and drugs, still does not mean they want to be there. It does not make them happy it makes them less miserable. I prefer my pets happy.

      Ours had a whole house to be her territory. She still started licking her fur and because she wanted to be outside to badly.
      She’s happy now.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 6:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.4   The Elf

      Some cats are like that. Mine aren’t.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.5   Jessi

      Yes, I’m a ” miserable excuse of a pet owner”. I *gasp* give my cats toys and also *gasp* keep them inside which, in the U.S. tends to double their life-expectancy. Apologies that I don’t want my cats to get hit by a car. Or eaten by a coyote. Or eaten by a hawk. Or eaten by a cougar. Or eaten by a lynx. Or eaten by a stray dog. Or bit by a snake. Or attacked by a feral, disease riddled cat.

      I can’t tell you how many “lost cat” signs are posted where I work. Most don’t come back, because, more than likely, they are dead.

      Also, my cats aren’t drugged (well, beyond the occasional cat nip). They aren’t even on any pheromone help (which is not “drugs”). Providing toys and puzzles for your cats, as well as leashed and supervised outside playtime is now the hallmark of a terrible owner? Yeah, that makes total sense.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.6   Vulpis

      You’re right–from that description, you aren’t a terrible pet owner…but only because you apparently have pets who actually do have a personality that matches that sort of keeping. But for the rest, I find myself in agreement with Susan. If a pet is incompatible with your living arrangements, it’s a better idea to find them a loving home they *are* compatible with, rather than trying to force it with drugs and similar treatments. Or are you one of these people that has similar views about children (‘My kid has energy and runs around like, well a kid! Obviously they have ADHD and need to be force-fed Ritalin until they sit around quietly all day!’)? And unfortunatly, changing your living arrangements to accomodate your pet is *not* always an option. :-(

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.7   Jessi

      “Or are you one of these people that has similar views about children (‘My kid has energy and runs around like, well a kid! Obviously they have ADHD and need to be force-fed Ritalin until they sit around quietly all day!’)?”

      No, but I’ve also met/known people with actual ADHD. Just so you know, you some across like you think anyone who has a kid with ADD (or who has ADD themselves) is doing something wrong by medicating.

      “And unfortunatly, changing your living arrangements to accomodate your pet is *not* always an option.”

      Trust me, I know how difficult it is to find a place to live – I own two Pit Bulls (you don’t know how difficult it is to find a place to live until you do so with a “restricted breed”). I’ve also, as far as I know, never commented on Connie trying to find a new home for her cat. I’ve only, as far as I know, commented on the indoor/outdoor debate.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 5:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #11.8   Raichu

      Except not. Or do you think if the kitty is miserable all the time, that doesn’t matter?

      Jul 30, 2012 at 1:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   Amy

    Yeah… honestly… Brian is right. It will probably end up at a shelter with 500 other unwanted cats & it will be put down. If you care about your cat at all, you take it with you. And you don’t move to an apartment that doesn’t allow cats. And cats should not be running around outdoors anyway, for a whole bunch of reasons I won’t get into right now.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Amber

      I agree with you, but I do have to say that as someone who just had to move with two cats and a small dog, it is hard as HELL to find an apartment that will allow all of them. Many places will allow A cat or A small dog (which means she’d be fine), but I had to pay several hundred extra to keep these guys (plus a monthly pet fee), AND I still had to lie and say I only had 2 pets, because that was the maximum. :P BUT, I also only had about a month to look around, and I still managed to do it!

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.2   Vulpis

      Well, I won’t bother with the indoor/outdoor BS (because quite frankly, it’s not universal in the slightest). But the problem I’m having with this is that you’re basically saying that the OP shouldn’t be allowed to move *at all*. Finding a suitable living arrangement is *not* always an option. Being responsible enough to try to make sure the pet is cared for when there *isn’t* that option is far better than the alternative.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   Amber

    I don’t agree with the way he chose to “spread the word,” but I understand where he’s coming from. I hate that people who love their animals as much as they would their children are looked at as abnormalities. They’re a lifetime commitment. You wouldn’t give up your kid because you were moving somewhere that didn’t allow them. BUT, on the other side of the coin, if this woman has every intention of rehoming the cat with someone she knows, rather than just giving up at the end and throwing it in a shelter, then I’d consider that responsible enough. (I still don’t necessarily agree, but it’s better than going straight to a shelter. :P)

    Jul 25, 2012 at 10:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   kathlynn

      you may hate how ” people who love their animals as much as they would their children are looked at as abnormalities”
      I hate people bashing others for feeling the opposite. I’m not saying that people shouldn’t look for a place where their animals are allowed, it’s not always feasible. Don’t forget, different cities have different populations and available housing. in a small town it might be near impossible to find a small apartment or room that allows a pet. I know my mom was denied multiple places because of her pets. I know another person who is thinking of getting rid of her dog because guess what. she babied him so much, by treating him like a baby and taking him everywhere that he cannot be trusted to be home alone, and hates being outside.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:35 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #13.2   Vulpis

      So0mething to keep in mind here–sometimes, for whatever reason, you run into circumstances where you are no longer able to take care of a per–or a child–properly. In those cases, it’s sometimes necessary to make the hard choice to make sure they *are* taken care of properly, as opposed to being kept in an increasingly poor situation. For children, as another poster has pointed out, the government has programs in place to help keep that last resort choice from being used. Pets…you don’t get those options, unfortunately.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   Poltergeist

    My god, shut up people. I know many feel that pets are family, but she’s not abandoning her cat. She could have let it loose, moved away, and never come back. She’s doing what she thinks is best for it. Searching for a caring new home for your pet due to changes in your life doesn’t automatically make you a terrible person.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   Amy

      In what way is she NOT abandoning her cat, genius?

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.2   H for Toy

      If she were abandoning it, she’d just leave it outside and move. She’s finding it a new home, so it has a place to live when she moves. It’s not even like cats give a shit who feeds them.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.3   Poltergeist

      Don’t be an idiot. If she left her pet behind when she moves, that would be abandoning it. She’s looking to find it a new home because she feels it would be best for her cat.

      Maybe my life took me in a direction where I would have to move into a building that strictly prohibits pets. Would that make me a bad person if I found my kitty a new home?

      Maybe my fiance and I are moving in together, but our pets don’t get along at all. Finding a new home for one might be a better solution for everybody. Does that mean I’m abandoning my animal, even though my animal would be miserable otherwise? Or maybe I shouldn’t move in with my fiance and let my pets dictate my life.

      Stop and think before you go off on an irrational rampage.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.4   Jeanette

      I have been in a situation where I had to re-home my cats. It was impossible to find an apartment in my price range that allowed pets. It’s not an easy choice to make. This woman is looking for a good home for her pet. She’s not having her cat put to sleep or leaving her out in the country to fend for her self. She reached out to someone for help in re-homing her cat, and he made her out to be this evil person to all of their co-workers.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.5   Meggie

      Poltergeist, if you do have a girlfriend, I truly feel sorry for her. You are a loud-mouthed dumbass. If she leaves her cat behind, she’s abandoning it. It’s highly unlikely she’ll find it a good home & I’m sure she’ll up & leave, regardless. People do it everyday. And it’s wrong.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:18 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.6   Poltergeist

      I’m so glad you could glean that much about me by my postings, Meggie. The only loud-mouthed dumbass here is you and others like you who are so quick to demonize people who feel like re-homing a pet is the best or only solution. You don’t know Connie. How the fuck do you know that she’ll probably just up and leave, leaving her pet behind?

      Stop being a know-it-all because you clearly don’t know it all.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.7   The Elf

      She’s not abandoning her cat (not yet), but I from the information presented, I’m not convinced she’s tried other alternatives to re-homing.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.8   jUStPunkin

      Holy Christ people… She’s trying to find a new home for the cat. Happens all the time. She is doing the right thing – maybe she doesn’t want an indoor cat. Maybe she’s slightly allergic to cats (as I am), and having one indoors all day would mean she wouldn’t be able to breathe. Maybe she has a barn at her existing home, and the cat chases the mice and is perfectly happy living the life it was meant to live. Stop being such judgmental pricks.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.9   Snicklefritz

      Seriously folks – get off the soapbox – I can speak from personal experience – cats adjust. It’s better to find another loving home and trawl your personal resources to do just that. It’s not abondoning your pet. It’s a responsible thing to do.

      I’m the indentured servant to a cat whose owner needed to find a new home for her cat because of her changing home situation. I would take in another cat in a heartbeat if the opportunity arose again.

      Is my cat happy – who the hell knows – it’s a cat for cryin’ out loud.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:00 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.10   The Elf

      You can tell. A happy cat has his tail up more often than not, vocalizes/purrs, relaxes in favorite spots, kneads blankets, etc. An unhappy cat holds his tail down or puffs it, scurries instead of saunters, hides instead of relaxes, etc. Inappropriate peeing, excessive licking, not eating are also signs, but they could be something else too.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:00 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.11   Snicklefritz

      yeah, she does all these happy cat things – in addition to throwing up on my bed at 3 in the morning, and presenting me with mice in the wee early hours of the day.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:12 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.12   Rattus

      If she’s giving you mice, she’s happy. Possibly in love.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:35 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.13   Shelley

      Actually leaving you prey is considered by many behaviourists to be a sign that the cat does not consider you an adequate provider.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 8:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #15   teeko

    Nice to see so many animal lovers here. If you had a kid and were moving, would you say “Oh my new apartment doesn’t allow kids?” and try to give them away?
    When you sign up for a pet, you sign up for it’s life. You don’t just toss it out when it’s a bit of an inconvenience. How do you unlove something living like that?

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   H for Toy

      If you spend 24 hours in labor to give birth to a cat, you can compare your cat to my children.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.2   Heather

      Teeko, some of the low-lifes on this thread probably would dump of their kids too if it wasn’t illegal!

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.3   Kate

      So if someone only spends 4 hours giving birth to their kid does that make their child less important? What the f does the time involved matter?

      Pets are important to people, it’s not your or anyone else’s business to inform people how they are allowed to value them.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.4   strangelove bang

      Some of them probably should. For the better interest of the child. Or cat. A wise person makes the right choice. An ignorant one damns them for it.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:18 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.5   Ren

      I’m moving and I can’t take my cat with me. I’m moving in with someone who already has the legal limit. My cat also does not do well indoors- tears up furniture, knocks everything off of tables, etc. and constantly mews at the doors and windows, even before I ever let her outside. If I have people over, it gets worse. It’s not abandoning if your trying to find the thing a decent home. Connie obviously cares for the pet since she’s trying to find a home where it will be comfortable instead of cramming it in into an apartment. If she thought it was “disposable”, why not just kill it? Also, cats are meant to be outdoors. WTF do you think tigers are?

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.6   H for Toy

      You’re missing the point, Kate.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.7   weaselby

      You guys need to stop using this flawed argument about abandoning kids if an apartment complex “doesn’t allow them.” The only time apartments can practice such housing discrimination, under the law, is if they want to impose an inhabitant limit (typically of 3 people to a unit) or if the complex is a retirement community. Why is it otherwise illegal to discriminate against familial situations, but totally fine to prohibit pets? Because PETS DO NOT EQUAL CHILDREN. I get that pets are beloved members of families who need care from responsible owners. But pets DO NOT equal children, no matter how passionately you try to claim otherwise, or how ugly you can get about the whole thing. Rehoming your pet is NOT the same as abandoning your child. Come on, people.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.8   Omnivore

      Cats are not children. They have never been and never will be. Your comparison is completely asinine.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.9   Jessi

      @Ren “Also, cats are meant to be outdoors. WTF do you think tigers are?”

      Really? That’s your line of reasoning? Well then, you’re an ape – go live in the freaking jungle like a Gorilla.

      Domestic cats aren’t meant to live outdoors. There are many dangers they face in places (like the U.S.) which haven’t completely decimated the population of wild animals. Also, they are a danger to local populations of animals.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.10   Kate

      No, I get the point. However, I think people getting snotty about how much more importanttheir kids are is obnoxious. of course pets are not people, but they are loved and often very much. If someone is doing something to put an animal’s life over your kid’s, or their safety then you should speak up, but who cares if they say how much they love their pet, it doesn’t threaten your kids importance, it just makes you look like a jerk.

      Also, I don’t think there is anything wrong with rehoming a pet as long as it’s somewhere they will be safe and cared for.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.11   H for Toy

      Nope, Kate. Still not getting it. I’m not saying you’re not allowed to love your pets as much as I love my children. I’m not saying you’re insane for having pets instead of children. I’m not saying that everyone should love my children and count them as the most important being in this world. What I am saying is… exactly what weaselby at 15.7 said.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 8:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #16   Terry

    No one has to choose between an animal and a child. It is possible to love both. And if my animals don’t go, I don’t go. PERIOD.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Kore

      My kids love our cats more than I do, and would be devastated if we re-homed the kitties.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #16.2   Vulpis

      Well, I’m glad you live in such a wonderful world where you have that option, really. Not everyone *does* have that option.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #17   DervishHeart bang

    Brian is a complete tool for what he did.
    I also happen to agree with him 100%.

    And for you people who claim she is not abandoning her catbecause she’s looking for a new home for it: the cat has bonded with her for five years – a huge chunk of its life. She is the only family it knows. *Ofcourse* she is abandoning the cat.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Greendragon00

      Giggles at the concept of cats bonding with an owner. Dogs maybe but cats – no way.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.2   The Elf

      Do you have any cats?

      I’ve had a bunch over the years. Some cats “bond” with every human that has food. Some are very, very dedicated to the few humans they bond with and refuse the merest touch of all others. Most are in-between. They definitely have their preferences!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.3   Katie

      Okay Greendragon, you go ahead and tell that to my clingy, needy, follows-me-around-the-house-constantly cat. Maybe you can actually convince him that he doesn’t need to see me every second of the day. That would be great because he annoys the crap out of me sometimes. Not bonding, my foot.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.4   Rattus

      Greendragon, you obviously don’t know cats. We have four. All four like both of us, but two have bonded with Mr. Rattus and two have bonded with me. They all stand and look sad when we leave for the day, they all greet us enthusiastically when we return, whether they’re hungry or not. One of my two dances up to me, stands on his back legs and begs to be picked up, where he snuggles and purrs like an outboard motor. If we’re in the house, they spent most of their time in the house. If we’re out in the backyard, they’re out in the backyard. If Mr. Rattus is out back and I’m in the living room, his favoured two are with him, my two are with me, one stretched out at my feet, one snoozing beside me.

      Cats absolutely bond with their people.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #17.5   Ti

      Seems like this all boils down to ego. My cat is ridiculously clingy too–follows me around, “talks” to me when I come home, shoves his head in my hand when he wants petting, despises strangers–doesn’t mean he wouldn’t bond with someone else and forget me entirely given time. About that, I have no illusions. Just because someone bonds with you doesn’t mean you have a moral obligation to stick with them for life. Can you imagine that philosophy as applied to dating? Madness. Get over yourselves. Your cat already has.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #18   Anna

    So… this is an adult cat staying at its home. She’s letting the ADULT cat stay in the city where it grew up.

    It’s not like a child because it’s not a child, or even a child cat. It’s not a furbaby (dumbest term ever) because IT’S NOT A BABY. This cat is five. I human years that’s long after it can be out of the home.

    And for those of you who think having a pet is like caring for your own genetic material in the flesh… I feel sorry for your kids. It’s absolutely nothing like that, even if like me you view a pet as a lifetime commitment. It really isn’t.

    This is pathetic. If you think that you are making the same level of commitment to a dog as you would to a child, then why not adopt a human being instead? Another lifetime commitment, but in this case you might save a human life.

    What’s that you say? You aren’t ready for that level of commitment? You aren’t sure if you could do it?

    But it’s just like getting a dog, right? Right?

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   Jami

      Pets are even more of a responsibility. Kids eventually take care of themselves. Your pet you have to care for their entire life. And unlike your kids, they love you unconditionally.

      Sorry, but my dog is more important than a job, an apartment, or even a man. I wouldn’t give her up for anything. And everyone should feel the same for their pets. Because you are your pet’s entire world.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #18.2   Poltergeist

      Not everybody is fortunate enough to have the freedom to turn down an apartment or a job for their pets. It’s called reality.

      And I’m not trying to minimize the care that goes into having a pet, but it is most certainly not the same as having to raise a human child.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #18.3   Jess

      No, pets are not more responsibility than a child. Are you insane? Don’t ever let Jami watch your children, holy crap! A dog lives MAYBE 14 years, if you are lucky, many children still need their parents until they’re in their 20s. Life is not easy for humans, but it certainly is for any pet that has a home with a loving human. By the time your dog is 2 it’s as old as an adult human and fully capable of walking, being house trained, and staying out of most dangers. You are lucky if a child can do one of those things by the age of 2. I think all of the people on this thread who are vilifying Connie need to have their heads examined. Finding a new home for a pet is EXACTLY what all the experts say you do if you can’t care for them anymore. Connie wants her cat to be happy, not clinically depressed and medicated. Making the animal unhappy for your own self righteousness is sociopathic and INSANE.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:12 am   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #18.4   weaselby

      I also despise the term “furbaby.” And I’m an animal lover. How’d I get to this point? I had kids. And suddenly my priorities were clear. I hate that term, because it perpetuates this seriously screwed-up thinking that pets are kids. They are nowhere near kids, except for the fact that you love them. That’s it.
      Kids are way harder than pets, are you joking?! You have to feed and water a pet, tend to its potty needs, and maybe put it through an obedience course. Children you have to feed, change, dress, teach to sleep, teach to eat, teach to dress themselves, teach to share, teach to use the potty, teach to talk, teach to be self-reliant, tend to their emotional needs, provide for their security and well-being, teach to be independent, teach to be a contributing member of society.
      Seriously. Pets are harder than kids?? Please tell me that was a bad, sick joke.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:52 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #18.5   Ti

      “Because you are your pet’s entire world.”

      Oh please. Get over yourself.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:34 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #18.6   OHSue

      Also hate term “fur babies”. I have a kid and a cat and they are not equals. My relationship with my son has evolved in many ways. With the cat it’s about food, a nap and petting at her choice. Love them both, but equals, no way.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 10:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #18.7   shadedrow

      i have to agree that adopting a kid would be nothing like getting a dog or cat. for one, the furry version is cuter, doesn’t ask for college money, and will never scream “i hate you” over a candybar.

      on the other side, i recently found four aprox. 8 week old kittens abandoned in a park. due to space considerations and my husbands adamant request, only one will remain in our small home with our very happily indoor only(she cries and clings to me if taken outside) 3 yearold tabby and us. i’m rehoming the others to people i trust to care for them and love them, though i have no way of ensuring this beyond knowing the people. does this make me a bad pet parent?

      Jul 29, 2012 at 3:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #19   Ginny

    85% of the people on this thread are clinically insane.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   quat

      And also fucking nuts.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:36 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.2   Silence

      And scare the shit out of me.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.3   Omnivore

      And would probably be a surrogate for a cat if it were possible. Eesh.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #20   Laura

    I’m not a fan of ‘outdoor cats’ as they use the neighborhood as their littlebox. And, people don’t own outdoor cats that ‘don’t do well indoors’, they’re just visitors that stop by on a regular basis.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Ren

      What? Animals poop outside??? GROSS!!!!!

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.2   Jessi

      What? Animals poop outside and their owners don’t pick up after them? GROSS!

      It’s also irresponsible and against the law.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.3   Susan

      Birds even poop from ABOVE! Every 15 min!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 6:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.4   Laura

      Ren – No, it’s not about animal poop outside being gross. It’s about cats pissing and pooping in people’s yards, gardens, planted pots etc. Cat feces frequently carry parasites that can infect humans. People have to pick up after their dogs, but let their cats roam free. It’s just irresponsible pet ownership.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.5   observer

      Someone in my neighborhood got a HUGE orange outdoor cat, that asshole cat likes to roam around whenever it wants to, and use our backyard (little area with sand) like it’s own litter box. Now, I can forgive it for doing that, when you gotta go, you gotta go, at least it covers it up afterward, but what I can’t forgive is that dang cat eating my dogs’ food and try to attack my dogs.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 6:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.6   Vulpis

      Not to mention that outside there’s all this pollen and insects and germs and dirt! We should obviously sterlize the entire planet and pave it over!

      ….Pardon me, I need to go find a mob, as I’ve dripped sarcasm all over the floor.

      Though Laura is probably at least partly right about the ‘strictly outdoor’ pets–you’re not an owner, you’re a convenient bed and food source.
      …Though come to think of it, that also describes some dating situations I’ve seen, too. ‘I’ve got a strictly outdoor girlfriend! She only comes over for dinner and to sack out on the couch!’

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.7   Jessi

      “Not to mention that outside there’s all this pollen and insects and germs and dirt! We should obviously sterlize the entire planet and pave it over!”

      If you own an animal, then you’re legally responsible for picking up their shit. End of story.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 4:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.8   Rattus

      You people with the poop issues – raccoons must just give you the shits. Who do you expect to come clean up after them? Or do you just twitch at your window, muttering invectives and shaking your fist?

      Jul 28, 2012 at 8:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.9   AlfaCowboy

      Your analogy doesn’t follow, Rattus. You (and others) always change the subject from “responsible pet ownership that includes cleaning up after your pets” to “general poop issues.” I’ll be sure to send my boxer to poop in your yard, since you have no problem with it. Maybe I’ll teack my 6-year-old sons to use your yard as a toilet as well, since it’s just natural to find poop in the yard.

      Yes. We realize wild animals poop in nature. Unlike you, we also realize that pet owners own pets, not wild animals, and that responsible ones don’t allow their non-wild-animal pets to use their yards as bathrooms. I’m a good neighbor, so I clean up after my dog. Pet owners that don’t clean up after their dogs and cats are simply not good neighbors.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 1:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #21   Rocky

    If Brian really cared about the cat, he wouldn’t have called her “it.” Just sayin’, Bri.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #22   Alexis

    As someone who adores her 6 (rescued) animals and has 2 children I side with Connie. There are just some cats that are *not* happy inside and will make your life a living hell if you try to force them to live in an apartment – I’ve had one. He was destructive, obnoxious and miserable until he went to my folks’ property where he has lived a happy life as a barn cat ever since. People who haven’t had outdoor cats don’t understand that you can’t just take one and expect it to joyfully trade in its wide open spaces for 900 or so square feet! Plus, outdoor cats just don’t bond with people the way an indoor cat does. I seriously doubt she’s spent hours upon hours outdoors with this cat, most likely it looks to her as a food source and a friendly face and little more.
    Has anyone considered that maybe Connie isn’t planning to just dump this cat off if nobody takes it? And just maybe she’s asking around to see if anyone wants to take over its care so she won’t have to take it with her which is her backup plan?

    Anyone who loves their cat as much as their child is parenting wrong. I thought that way before my first son was born, whole heartedly, that my pets were my “babies”…then my actual baby was born and I had a serious priority check.

    Jul 25, 2012 at 11:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Poltergeist

      Alexis, you are one of the few rational pet-lovers in this comment section. Thank you.

      Jul 25, 2012 at 11:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.2   makfan bang

      Alexis, all good points.

      Let me say that we have had four cats (one has passed on). The first three were re-homes for one reason or another. We could give them a nice space and lots of love and care when their original owners could not. Win-win, if you ask me.

      We got the first boy when he was a little over five and I loved him to pieces. I’m still sad that we lost him last year. The next two are a brother/sister pair. The girl likes me a lot and the boy likes my partner a lot. The fourth was a shelter kitten that we have had for 11 months now.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.3   Stacey

      Alexis, I think I love you. I actually felt like I was taking crazy pills reading the comments.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.4   Raichu

      wish I could upvote this more than once.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 1:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.5   Feioo

      Thank you, Alexis! I’ve owned cats my whole life, from our first who showed up pregnant on our doorstep and became an inside cat until she died, to three consecutive males who made our lives absolutely miserable when they weren’t allowed out until they became indoor/outdoor. One of those males belonged to my sister; when she moved into an apartment she brought him along and tried to make him an indoor cat. He slipped out after a month and vanished, never to be seen again.
      My neighbors have two outdoor-only female cats who are TERRIFIED of being indoors – trust me, they’ve tried to bring the cats in, and they just slink around in corners with their eyes huge and their ears flat back. They’re also the best ratters I’ve ever met.
      I recently moved to a house on the same property as a horse boarding stable. One of the trainers there keeps three barn cats – all very well taken care of, fed great food, spayed, with regular vet visits. They are all super friendly and love to socialize with all of the 40+ people that board there. Occasionally someone will “rescue” one of them and secretly take it home (which the trainer finds very upsetting as they are basically stealing her pets) and the cats have so far always eventually returned to the barn, sometimes unhealthily fat and with skin conditions from eating cheap food, and happily resume their lives as rat-catching hay-loft-sleeping barn cats.

      Point being, that cats are extremely individual animals and have different needs. In my experience (and I have worked with animals, at vets, shelters, pet food shops and dog daycares my entire working career) it is always kinder to think of the animal’s needs when rehoming – does the cat’s attachment to its territory and lifestyle outweigh its attachment to you? Then it is ABSOLUTELY appropriate to find it a home that suits it, rather than attempting to force it to conform to a lifestyle that will make it miserable.

      Aug 1, 2012 at 2:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #23   Hapax Legomenon

    In the neighborhood where I grew up, there was a cat named Tigger who felt like he belonged more to the neighborhood than to his humans; he would visit many different houses all over the block, and he’d come inside to stay a while if you let him. When the family that owned Tigger moved, he kept trying to escape and come back to the neighborhood, growing increasingly miserable when his attempts were thwarted. Finally, someone else in our neighborhood took him so that he could safely go on visiting all the neighbors.
    I don’t know if Connie personally is a cat-abandoning asshole, but there are plenty of situations where trying to arrange for your pet to have the best possible life means giving your pet to a friend. Yes, many cats feel a particular affinity for their human families, but others are more like roommates who have their own lives and agendas and would rather move out than have to make major lifestyle changes. We don’t even know if Connie’s always had this cat–maybe it was given to her when it was already an adult, or maybe it was an abandoned stray she took in.
    Cats are cats, not humans. That doesn’t mean they should be abandoned or neglected or abused in any way, but it definitely means they have different emotional and social needs than humans, and they’re not the pack animals humans are.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #24   RubySun bang

    Sometimes I think it takes having children to give you some perspective on pets and animals. I have a cat that’s – yeah I’ll say it – basically a substitute baby because I can’t have another child. I love this freakin’ cat. So much, that I don’t even care when he dries himself on my duvet after coming in from the rain (funnily enough, behaviour I _wouldn’t_accept from my 9 year old child). I’m not inclined to make a judgment call about someone leaving their cat to take a new job though. It’s a CAT, after all. Not the owners fault her cat is outdoor-sy. Cats have fascinating and individual personalities, right? Maybe this one would be totally devastated if she had to move to an apartment and spend the rest of her days plotting how to jump off the teeny weeny balcony to end her misery.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #25   Alexis

    I’d also like to point out she said the cat doesn’t do well indoors, meaning she’s TRIED to make it an indoor cat and it didn’t work out. A cat like that would most likely take the first opportunity to run past you out the door of your new apartment (which it hates) and would never be seen again.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #26   Holly

    I’m wondering just how many people on this thread that are saying that Connie is abandoning her cat and that pets are a life-long commitment are also the people who would also encourage others to give pets a home without getting all “but really think about it! You have to keep that pet until it dies, even if your financial situation changes and you can’t afford one any more, even if you become allergic, even if you end up marrying someone who also has pets and those pets don’t get along and aren’t happy in that home, even if you decide to have a kid, even if you just don’t want to take care of the pet any more.” Because the only people I have ever heard stress the later before getting a pet were people who liked their animals best when they were far away. Either pets are a serious commitment and we should all make sure those ASPCA ads with the Sarah McLachlan end immediately and shelters make sure that everyone is super-serious and have given the decision to get a new pet lots of thought and planning, or we can lay off Connie.

    Regardless of her motives and situation, finding a new home is EXACTLY what you’re supposed to do if you cannot provide an animal with a happy and healthy environment anymore. There’s a good chance this cat has bonded with her, but pets are capable of bonding with more than one person in their life, even later in life. Hell, if it is true that she just doesn’t want to put in the financial and emotional effort into taking care of the cat, that cat might react to the new owner as “omg, savior?? Snuggle-times!!!” and be much happier.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #27   liz

    On the side of the note-writer, here….

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #28   Seanette

    I just moved from one apartment to another recently. At least half the properties in my area would allow cats, with additional security deposit or sometimes other requirements (the place we settled on charges an extra $15/month pet rent, plus her deposit). You CAN find apartments that take cats, if you’re not too lazy to TRY.

    The cat will probably be better off with a more caring, motivated human.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   kathlynn

      that’s how it is where you live, each country, state, and/or city will have a different ratio of pets allowed, or how much extra they charge you. And don’t forget, not everyone can afford mega bucks for security deposits.
      so Just because it’s so where you live doesn’t mean it’s like that everywhere.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.2   Vulpis

      Well, I’m glad that you can afford the additional depoisits and such. Not everyone has that luxury. Not to mention that in the decription of the situation in the first place, Connie mentioned having to settle for a small apartment *because* she couldn’t find a more suitable place. Keep in mind that just because properties that allow pets exist, they’re not always *avaiable*, especially in a particular budget range.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.3   Tess

      I wish I could have found somewhere that was that cheap. The only apartments in my price range that allowed pets required a $500 deposit per pet with an additional $100 per month per pet. The places that weren’t in my price range (ie, even if I worked 60 hours a week every week I couldn’t afford to live there) had cheap pet fees but it’s not always do-able.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 3:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #29   Mom of Three

    I’m on Brian’s side, actually.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   magen

      Maybe you two can be the cat’s parents then.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #30   quat

    Hey all you haters! Guess what!? I REHOMED A CAT ONCE! Yes! And what happened? The cat was happy. The new owners were happy. And I was happy. So… come one, come all. HATE AWAY!!

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.1   quat

      Not only that, BUT I REHOMED NOT ONE, BUT TWO dogs… and that also went well. Just so you know that it actually HAS happened in the world JUST ONCE and it worked out. For everyone.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:00 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.2   Pit Pat

      Oh no you don’t! You don’t get all that credit. Because I, too, have rehomed a cat! And she was happier than YOUR rehomed cat!

      *yesterday’s Carolyn Hax column was about one-upping, so I’m practicing.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.3   Nyx

      OMG, I rehomed pets too! They were given to someone who would love them to death, and they were happy!

      We are such monsters.

      Aug 5, 2012 at 11:21 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #31   Ermott

    I’m sorry but I have to agree with many here and say, pets aren’t disposable.

    We have a 13 year old Siamese who travels with us when we work. We drive over 180,000 miles a year. He loves it, goes to sit in his carrier bag when we are home in hopes of going out again.

    When we were offered a better opportunity with another company which didn’t allow pets (We work in specialised, high dollar freight forwarding, transporting such things as jet engines and airplane suspension parts) we turned it down.

    No Timmy? No go.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   JT

      I think the most important part is that your cat “loves it.” So good for you for making the needs of your cat a priority. Just like Connie is.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #31.2   Vulpis

      Good for you for having the option to turn down a job like that. A lot of us don’t have the luxury. I’m still failing to understand why choosing to make sure your pet is in a home where it will be happy rather than one where it won’t be is treating it as ‘disposable’. If the OP thought her cat was disposable, she wouldn’t be making this effort in the first place.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #32   Lindsay

    I am an animal lover. I have been around animals my whole life. I prefer my pets over some of my actual relatives (keep reading) and most of the people I see every day while working retail. I Agree With Connie.

    I’ve had at least 1 cat living with me every day since I was born and many of my friends and family members have cats. Some Just Don’t Do Well Indoors. For most of my childhood the kitchen window HAD to be open 24/7/365 because that was Jasper’s window and you did not want to mess with Jasper when he felt trapped. I have a small scar on my back to prove it. I live in Canada. Winter Is COLD. But we loved that crotchety ball of fur.

    I think that she is being responsible by asking around to see if someone can take better care of him instead of moving into an apartment, having him find a way outside and never coming back, thus becoming one of the many strays on the streets. It happened to a friend of mine when she moved away. Her roommate found the cat injured in an alley over a week later. Several days and an expensive vet bill later, Emma drove for 3 hours to leave a drugged Milo with her parents. She wasted a lot of gas coming to see him over the next few years before she had a place that was right for him and took him back.

    While Connie may not be the best owner, she *is* better than many. I currently have 2 cats because my own cousin was moving into a “no animals” building, and instead of looking around for new owners, was going to leave them in a nearby park. I put them in an empty box and in my car as soon as I heard. They were only 6 months old at the time, had never been outdoors for more than a few minutes, and never farther than the porch. (I’ve always suspected this was an excuse. Her ex had bought them for their daughter’s 1st birthday – yeah – and after he left, she couldn’t afford the house and used her new living arrangements to her advantage. She bought a dog only 3 months later for Christmas while still living in the “no animals” apartment. She gave it to a neighbour in the very same building that spring. Et cetera, et cetera over the last 8 years. You read that correctly. The longest she’s kept a pet is 1 year – an average life for a hamster.)

    There are legitimate reasons for relinquishing responsibility of an animal. If the animal is sick and you are unable to care for it or pay for its veterinary bills. If you have had a child and the child is allergic or if you have developed allergies late in life. (My grandmother moved in with my parents for nearly a year to recuperate from hip surgery, and my brother was glad to take care of the old family dog because Nan had developed allergies while in her 60s.) If you have been in an accident and can no longer walk or play with your dog, isn’t it better to give it to someone who can than to watch it lie around the house? This Is Not Abandonment. This is ensuring your pet has the best life it can have – even if it means you’re not the one taking care of it any longer.

    This Brian character and several of you are SELFISH to think this is wrong. You should be ashamed to call yourselves animal lovers. In fact, I honestly believe he may be doing more harm than good – possibly turning other people against Connie, making it hard to find a new home for her cat and Forcing her to give him to the humane society or (and I shudder at the thought) simply abandon him on the street (like many of you are prophesising) because she cannot find a better alternative. I hope she finds someone that understands and gives him the home he deserves before it comes to this. You never know, maybe she’s just looking for a temporary home while she finds a better place for both of them.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #32.1   Poltergeist

      Linsay, your post has won the comment section and my heart. All of these high and mighty animal lovers here could learn a thing or two from you.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #32.2   makfan bang

      Thank you, Lindsay. This is not a zero tolerance situation.

      Hell, people at times decide to give up their children for adoption because they feel they can’t for them. Sometimes that is the right decision, and sometimes re-homing a pet is the right decision.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #32.3   PMSL

      Love this post. People could learn a thing or two from you!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #33   Jessela

    I think the comments have gotten pretty overblown for ppl who arn’t in the situation.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 1:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #33.1   Lindsay

      Yeah… the insanely rare times that I post, I tend to be overly wordy…


      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #33.2   magen

      No joke this is my first time ever bothering to post this has irked me so much. God damn people.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #34   Phizzle

    Shoot, I kick my cats out when they’re no longer kittens, but that’s just me. Bravo for 5 good years! LMAO

    Jul 26, 2012 at 2:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #35   Kio Jonny

    Look. I love my cats. I would be devastated if I had to leave them behind, for any reason. But, if something caused me to feel, for some reason, that I couldn’t care for them properly any more, or that it was in their best interest that I find someone better able to care for them than I was, I would look for someone to help me, and hope that they understood that my cats need a loving home that I am no longer able to provide, that I am trying to cope with a very harsh and unpleasant truth in my life, and that I am not automatically a monster because I wasn’t able to take them with me. NOTE: not that I didn’t WANT to take them, because no one with an attachment to a pet wants to trow them aside, but that I was not ABLE to care for them properly. It’s just like a poor person having their kids taken from them, or the abuse that a homeless man gets for trying to keep his dog because he has no one else to share his affection and life with.
    It’s not fair to just dump hate on a person because their circumstances have taken them to a point that not only alters their life in drastic ways, but robs them of the companionship that might make that transition easier.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 2:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #36   Red Delicious

    “doesn’t do well indoors?” When my grandparents lived in rural Texas, they had a cat that lived outdoors. But when they decided to move to the city to be closer to the grandkids, they didn’t just leave the cat or try to find someone to keep it! They brought the cat with them and TRAINED THE CAT TO LIVE INSIDE. It’s completely possible. Put on the big girl panties and take a little responsibility.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 2:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   Kaz

      It can’t have been a true outdoor cat then. A true outdoor cat CAN’T be trained to live indoors.
      I’m not saying none can, there are levels of indoor/outdoor cats and some really cannot stand to be cooped up, whereas some will manage.

      A cat who truely hates being forced to stay indoors will remain miserable until the fateful day a door or window is left open just a little too long and it will make a mad dash for it. Since it knows it’ll be trapped upon return, it’ll be reluctant to come back too soon.
      If it’s never seen the area before, it will then most likely get lost or hurt.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.2   Strawberry Creme

      There are cats that CANNOT be trained to live inside. I had a siamese cat a long time ago that was 26 lbs of pure muscle. He was originally a stray that just showed up and decided our home was his. We wanted to make him indoor because he came to us declawed, and despite that would bring home full-grown rabbits.

      We tried *everything* — the dropped keys trick, keeping him in only at night first, feeding him inside on a set schedule, shutting him in a room without windows, giving him lots of toys and cat trees, etc. Nothing worked — first he would howl miserably at the door for hours like he was being tortured, then he figured out how to open doors. And then he ripped a hole in the screen door. After that we gave up and let him do what he wanted. He lived a long happy life exploring the woods and coming home whenever he wanted to. He was the sweetest, most affectionate cat I’ve ever had even if he did come home with burrs in his fur twice.

      This poor girl is being bashed for putting her CAT FIRST, *before* herself. She isn’t dumping him on a shelter or throwing him away — she’s trying to find him a new home where he’ll be happier than he will be with her in her new (tiny) place. That’s not selfish — that’s selfless.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.3   magen

      Gosh that one cat is such a good sampling FOR EVERY CAT [email protected]@

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.4   Vulpis

      If you think that cat was ‘trained’…you obviously don’t know much about cats. What you have there is a cat who was *willing* to live primarily indoors after having lived mostly outdoors. Problem is–not all cats are like that. Your grandparents were lucky to have had that kind of cat–they could just as easily have had one who hated being indoors, and would either be dealing with the damage caused by the cat, or lamenting that it had gotten loose and disappeared.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:34 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #37   A Stewart

    While I’m loath to put words into people’s mouths, let’s consider what Connie might have said.
    Connie: Hi Brian, this is Connie.
    I know you’re a big animal lover so I was wondering if you could help me with a difficult problem I’m facing. I’m moving to a new apartment next month and I’m really worried about my cat. I’ve had her for five years and she’s as sweet as pie, but she really needs space to run around – space that my new apartment just doesn’t have. Had I been able to afford a bigger/more spacious/land endowed apartment then I would have, but property like that just does not exist in my new neighbourhood – trust me, I looked.
    As I said, my cat doesn’t do well with being indoors: she scratches up furniture and bounces off the walls and it causes her a great deal of distress. She will also bolt for any open door when she is in this state and in my new location this could mean straight out onto a freeway. I’ve tried the cat calming medication my vet gave me, but my poor girl was so disoriented and drugged up that I couldn’t bear the thought of it – I love my cat far too much to see her be a drugged up vegetable just because I’m the one who’s had to move.
    Sorry Brian, this has probably gone on too long but I just wanted to explain. My cat has been a great companion to me for five years, and while we have a very special bond and it would pain me greatly to let her go, I was just wondering if you knew of any loving homes who would be able to take her in and give her the life she deserves? I’m happy for you to come and see her, too. Thanks.

    Now, Brian: So, some she-bitch from the inner circles of hell wants to abandon her cat because she’s a vicious life sucking harpy. Thought you might like to know.

    And 95% of the commenters of the thread: OMG SHE DEVIL! Grab the pitch forks! How DARE she want to ABANDON her BABY? She’s insane and a danger to human life!
    Context is everything, folks.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 2:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #38   WTG Brian

    Actually kudos to her neighbor. Her cat probably will end up in a shelter and will be put to sleep because it’s not a cute kitten. Somebody needs to stand up to these losers who don’t realize a pet is a commitment FOR LIFE.

    Go fuck yourself Connie. Hope your cat found someone better than you.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 3:36 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #38.1   Silence

      That’s not how shelters work at all. Thanks for playing!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #38.2   magen

      One less cat yall

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #38.3   Vulpis

      The only reason the cat would end up in a shelter is because everyone else around Connie were asshats like Brian and for some reason think the cat would be somehow better off in an environment it hates.

      Though unfortunately, Silence…check the stats on PETA shelters, in particular. :-(

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #39   Kaz

    I feel it cruel to keep an animal cooped up indoors when instincts tell them they should be running free, investigating things and marking out territories. Cats are far better at looking after themselves than other animals and it’s natural to make them an outdoor cat when that’s possible. If it’s no longer possible, it’s only fair to find it a new home where it can enjoy the same freedoms.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 3:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #40   blindwilly

    You lot crack me up – its a cat, not an abandoned baby. BTW the cat is probably thinking ‘glad when she moves out, someone else will step in and take care of me – gullible humans!’
    And lastly this site is called Passive Aggressive Notes and some of you really know how to do that, taking chunks out of each other over a note about a cat!!
    Now feel free to get all freaky again.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 4:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #41   Pepper

    i chose not to have kids. i got dogs instead and have yet to regret my decision. i get that some people don’t understand animal lovers. i often don’t understand parents. that said, personally, i would never abandon my dogs. would i turn down a job that would mean having to give them up? yes.

    i have been in the unfortunate situation of having to give up two (indoor) cats upon finding out that i was severely allergic to them, though i suffered through allergies and a barrage of meds until i could find them a new home (together). i had no idea i was allergic prior to getting them – i just thought i was suddenly sick all the time. imagine my surprise when i found out it was due to my cats. it was devastating. it took me some time, but in the end, i did find them a beautiful home… two of my stipulations for their new home were that they remain indoor cats and that they remain together. i personally took them to their new home with a very sweet divorcee (whose home was much larger than my own – more for the cats to explore).

    had i known up front that i was allergic, i’d never have put the cats, or myself, through that. as happy as i was to put them in a good home, i was devastated to give up my cats.

    i would never do it again. my husband and i have two (non-shedding) dogs who we will keep in our family for better or worse.

    kid people may think pet people are crazy but i know quite a few kid people who are way out of orbit. you just don’t know until you walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, so don’t be so quick to judge.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 4:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #41.1   catsarepeopletoo

      You would turn down a job if it meant losing your dogs?

      Good for you– you must have the sort of education and career that allows you such luxuries. Or a rich spouse, or a lot of savings, or a trust fund.

      Understand that most people are not in that situation. Good on you for making the effort to find those kitties good homes, but realize that for a lot of people keeping their “family” of pets for better or worse just isn’t feasible.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 4:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #42   Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    I really don’t understand why people think that sending a pet to live with someone else is a big deal. They’re animals; they just don’t have the same cognitive capacity as us. They don’t care where they live. They won’t remember their old home. Send the cat to live somewhere else; it’ll be totally happy.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 4:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #42.1   The Elf

      After a while, yes. But it will take some adjustment. Even moving an indoor-only cat, where all the belongings and people are the same, can have them hiding under the bed for days. Some cats adapt better to change than others, just like people.

      If this cat spends almost the entire day outdoors, then it has an established territory and routine. In a new outdoor environment, it will have to find – possibly take from another animal – a new territory and develop a new routine, and all this without the human companion it knows. The cat might get lost, or try to return to his previous territory, or refuse to return “home” to the new human. If this cat has to adapt to a new indoor territory, it has the double duty of figuring out indoor life plus a new human plus a new territory that may or may not have other pets in it.

      Even if Connie moves with the cat and tries to convert kitty to indoor life, this will be hard on the cat. If the new owners of Connie’s house are willing to take on the cat and leave the kitty in the outdoor life, this is probably the best of bad options. But even still, kitty has to adapt to the new humans.

      No, they don’t have the same cognitive capacity as us. But they aren’t purely stimulus-response creatures either. No matter what the scenario, this is going to be hard on the kitty. You’re selling cats as a species short.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:00 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #42.2   Vulpis

      That’s probably a good way to describe it, really–looking for the best of bad options. Connie’s obviously unable to have the best option, which is to take the cat with her and have it in an environment where it’ll be happy–so she’s trying to find the alternative where the cat will be in a happy home, rather than force it into a place where it won’t be happy.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #42.3   Chris Miller

      That’s how my oldest sister got her cat – she moved into her new house, intending to get a cat once she was settled in (our father HATES them, he has no soul), and woke up the next morning to find a loaf of bread with a huge hole in it and a fluffy grey cat who insisted she lived there now. Previous owners didn’t actually own her but she clearly knew the neighbourhood. Five years later she still has the cat, who is happily indoor/outdoor but also pretty clingy. I’ve done the whole feeding the cat while sister’s out of town thing and it’s not unusual to simply not see her – I’m not HER human, even if I am supplying food.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 2:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #43   bitchy the dwarf

    sounds to me like this was a neighborhood stray that the note-writer was feeding.

    I’ve had outdoor cats that I tried to bring inside and they ran out every chance they got and would disappear for days. If a cat lives outside you can’t just bring it indoors and expect it to be happy. Some of them just don’t adjust that well.

    That being said, even if she found someone willing to take the cat and give it an outdoor home, it’s probably going to run away and try to go back to the neighborhood it came from.

    If note writer truly was abandoning the cat without thought or remorse, she wouldn’t have gone through the trouble of trying to find it a home first. Besides she did not say that she would leave the cat there if not rehomed, she might end up taking it with her after all. Best case scenario in her eyes is to find it another outdoor home, she didn’t say what her Plan B was.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 5:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #44   jadefirefly

    Were I a bigger asshole, I would wish for all these people who swear there’s “always a choice if you really try” to find themselves broke, desperate, and with nowhere to go. And when they finally find a friend or family member to take them in, they realize that person / person’s family member is horribly allergic to animals, and they can’t bring their pet.

    I want to watch them choose to live on the street instead of accepting that offer. Because clearly, choosing the pet over the sensible option is the best choice for everyone involved. Right?

    Jul 26, 2012 at 5:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #45   Bonnie

    Excuse me but this is actually a website designed to find humor in the passive aggressive ways that people communicate. Usually, people leave funny comments or possibly responses to these hysterical notes. You people, with your desire to sit in judgement of a situation where you couldn’t possibly have all the facts, are MESSING IT UP FOR EVERYONE.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 5:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.1   Jessi

      What’s a “possibly reponse”?

      Jul 26, 2012 at 6:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.2   Lily11

      A possibly response is a probable typo.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.3   A Stewart

      It’s clearly not a typo. Think about it “to leave comments or possibly responses” = “to leave comments or possibly to leave comments”. The author was just using an adverb to avoid unnecessary reptition of the verb.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.4   Hapax Legomenon

      I think it was supposed to be “possible responses”–that is, imagined responses from people the note’s directed at.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #46   Loo

    Brian FTW.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 6:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #47   havingfitz

    Interesting to me is that he mentions the cat will end up on a shelter and not in a shelter. Well, they do like to climb…

    Jul 26, 2012 at 6:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #48   PMSL


    Brian is a dick, and all these die-hard Brian ass-kissers are just as bad. These are the kind of people who put animals above people, and then wonder why humanity is sinking (you can love animals AND your fellow man. It makes the world a better place if you do – you don’t have to choose one over the over FFS).

    Connie’s making the effort to find the cat a new home. I think that’s preferable to dumping it.

    She said the cat prefers the outdoors. All those saying she should have made it an indoor cat and that they call BS – do you know the history of the cat to judge? She may have been given it when it was already an adult. It might genuinely spend a LOT of time outside. My friend owned two cats like that! So STFU.

    Brian is a judgmental and very rude idiot for sending such a mail. Would he have preferred Connie to dump the cat? Why is he being such a douche about her asking for his help? Is Sheryl Kenville-Charboneau his equally repulsive alter ego? Questions, questions….

    Jul 26, 2012 at 7:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #48.1   quatfaux

      “Sheryl Kenville-Charboneau” IS Brian. He is leading a double life that his hypocrisy will not allow him to disclose, so he pours all his inner fury into judging people who try to rehome their cats. It is sad… so sad. Brian/Sheryl, I hope you can come to accept your problems someday, so that you can be more accepting of other people’s problems.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #49   Finch

    I agree that people shouldn’t just give pets away because they are inconvenient, but at least she is tying to find a loving home for him before she has to leave. I’ve had many pets in my life and I loved them all dearly, but at the end of the day, they aren’t people. They should be treated with respect and love, but they have different needs than people.

    When people give up their children because they cannot financially afford to care for them, we praise their selflessness. If animal lovers consider pets family, then how is giving up a pet to a better life, not the best option if they cannot be cared for and loved?

    Also, from a care standpoint, children and pets are not equal. If you move to a new home, no one is going to prevent you from bringing your kids. Also, there’s financial assistance for those who have trouble feeding themselves and their children. No one is going to help you feed your pet/ get it medical care.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 7:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #49.1   Kim

      I tried to reply to this but it hasn’t posted; I’m wondering if linking to a website causes the comment to be moderated. I apologize if my comment pops up twice.

      I did want to point out, however, that there ARE programs for financial assistance for those who have trouble feeding or getting medical assistance for their pets. A minimal amount of research – e.g. typing the term “pet food assistance” into Google – would show this. If you Google “having trouble affording your pet”, the first two links to come up are HSUS-offered resources for food and basic veterinary care.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #50   kermit

    Context is everything.

    And your decision to hyperbolically villify one person over the other undermines the entire point you were trying to make, #37.

    If she doesn’t find a home for the cat, it will be abandoned in a shelter or let loose in the neighbourhood – that’s a fact.

    Judging people who happen to be more attached to animals than you doesn’t make you a better person or score you karmic points.

    A pet is not a child and a child is not a pet. That doesn’t mean that you get to claim that one person’s love / grief for their pet doesn’t count as much as your love / grief for your child. Plenty of people don’t give birth to their human children and love them as much as some who were in labour for days. Plenty of people who have pets instead of children. It’s ridiculous that some of you want to rank people’s love for their pets/children.

    Some animals are indeed quite attached to their owners and their homes. Yes, we know that you and your vast life experience contradict that and the thousands of animal stories on Animal Planet, PBS, BBC, etc don’t count.

    No matter what strong opinion you hold, get over your self-righteous self and move the fuck on after stating your opinion. Repeatedly stating your opinion and calling everyone else who disagrees with you names is making these comments hostile.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 8:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #51   Connie

    It’s me – Connie. Wow! I guess I should have known I’d provoke strong feedback. The bottom-line is this: I bought the house years ago, before marriage and motherhood. The school my son should have attended was shut down by the school board this year due to budget cuts. He is due to start kindergarten next year, and if we stay here he will have to attend elementary school in a bad part of town. I used to live on that side of town before I bought my current house, and I know that it’s not a good area. I need to ensure that my child is in a good school district. How was I to know when I bought the house or adopted my cat that the school would shut down? I love my cat, but my son is my child and my top priority. My cat is a pet – not a baby. In fact, as long as she has her yard to run around, shady spots to rest in, food in her bowl and cool water to drink, she’s content. Hey, in the summer, I even put ice cubes in her water bowl. I tried to make her an indoor cat when I adopted her, but she was a rescue stray who was already used to the outdoors. She hates being inside and loves being outside – so it was a no brainer. She’s happy. She knows where she’s fed. And she only wandered the neighborhood for about the first week. Now she stays around in my spacious yard. I will not send my son to a bad school so I can hang on to my cat. If that makes me a bad pet owner, so be it. I’d rather be a bad pet owner than a bad mother. I can make a better choice for my son, and that’s what I’m doing. As far as my cat, I’m doing what’s best for her too, finding her a home where she can live the way she most enjoys. If that makes me a bad person, than I guess she deserves better anyway. Any takers?

    Jul 26, 2012 at 8:26 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.1   Connie

      And by the way, i’m still looking for a house to rent in our budget rather than an apartment because it is our preference. I want her to come with us, but I’m preparing for the possibility that we’ll have to settle for an apartment for at least a year.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:35 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.2   Katie

      Connie, I may be one of the minority here, but good for you. You’re doing the best you can in this situation and that’s all anyone can really expect of anyone. Personally, my cats have never been outdoor cats, both because I don’t trust people and because I don’t trust the local wildlife (and I don’t trust cats not to be dumb enough to bolt across the road.) But then again, I also got all of them when they were tiny and they’ve never been outside, so my personal feelings don’t apply to your cat (something a lot of people commenting would do well to remember).

      Of course cats have their own personalities – they’re not worms, and the little pea-brains can hold a probably surprising number of thoughts. But they’re also not people and they’re certainly not children. I’ve rehomed one of my cats too. It was unpleasant and I hated it, and I missed him terribly, but in the end, he was so much better off. And I hope you’re able to find someone who can look after your cat in the way that’s best for her. Good luck!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.3   Beth


      Oh wait. She seems to have a 100% completely rational explanation for why she needs to rehome her cat. Couldn’t have guessed that…

      Although some of you crazies will still think she’s evil because she put her son above her pet. Honestly, did someone send this link to PETA? What is going on in this thread?

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.4   H for Toy

      You know how people sometimes sell their houses with furniture included? You could totally sell the house with “backyard cat” included! It’s a definite perk ;)

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.5   AlfaCowboy

      Clearly, Connie, according to the crazy cat ladies (some pretending to be male) on this thread, you should choose what’s best for your cat over what’s best for your son. I personally think that’s not going far enough. I think you should sacrifice your son, feed him to your cat, and then beg all of the wackadoo cat people on here for forgiveness for even thinking of trying to find an alternative.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.6   The Elf

      I don’t think the moving is the problem, just the rehoming. Which, BTW, is much much better than just dropping her off at a shelter or just move and leave her furry butt for the next owner of the house to deal with. If no one has mentioned this before, I hope she is spayed. But you have to realize that prospective owners for middle-aged cats are hard to come by. I wish you and your kitty the best of luck.

      When you tried to get your cat to stay indoors, how long did you try? Cats need adjustment time. Did you creating a more stimulating environment? Did you try relaxing pheromones? Did you try gradually cutting down on her outdoor time?

      Moving, no matter what, is going to be stressful on the cat. But because the cat is getting a complete change of environment anyhow, it might be time to try moving her indoors again. If she has blankets or other such things that carry her scent, this can help her adjust. You can always rehome the cat later if it doesn’t work out. Rescue strays who are used to the outdoors can sometimes be converted to indoor-only status.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.7   Poltergeist

      Good for you Connie for having the courage to stand up and explain your situation. Don’t listen to these fools who are so quick to demonize despite having very limited knowledge. You have nothing to apologize for. Life throws us curve-balls and we have to make tough decisions. You’re doing what is best for everybody. I hope you told Brian to shove it.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:43 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.8   Strawberry Creme

      Thanks for the reply, Connie. What you’re doing isn’t selfish — it’s selfless. The cat will be happier for it.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.9   quatfaux

      Connie, you should be so ashamed that you have put the education of your son ahead of the care of that precious CAT. So what if he fails out of a terrible school, doesn’t go to college, and ends up on the streets a drunkard and a wastrel? You have a responsibility to that CAT for LIFE, don’t you understand? Snork! Fucking hell, Connie. Good luck!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.10   magen

      I would have never guessed the strong feedback on here from looking at the initial screencap. People are NUTS. And all over an animal tat won’t even come to you when you call it 75% of the time hahaha.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.11   Pit Pat

      Come on, Connie – if you are not psychic and could not predict your son’s school closure, it was soooooo irresponsible for you to get a cat. Same goes for everyone else.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 5:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.12   Connie

      Thank you all for the kind responses. After reading the hate mail, I’m convinced I couldn’t have been less loathed by some if I had mixed anti-freeze in her cat food or set her tail on fire. I guess the venomous words were meant to make me feel low, but it had quite the opposite effect. I am now thankful for the clarity of mind to understand that my cat is a pet. She’s not my other child, she’s not a member of my family…she’s a pet. My duties as her owner are to care for her well, and if I can no longer do that, to find a suitable home for her. It’s not to bind myself to her until death do us part even if it conflicts with the best interest of my family. After reading the comments bashing me for trying to do right by her, I say this…if ever my mind is so warped that I regard my cat as a more serious commitment than my child as one poster says…if ever I am in a flood crisis and I refuse rescue for my family unless my cat can come too like another poster, someone please push me into the rising water. Let it carry me away to death and put my son into that boat and send him off to a mother worthy of him. I will never refuse an opportunity to better my child’s life so that my cat won’t have to re-adjust. She has had a good life with us for 5 years. She’ll be re-adjusting if she comes with us and she’ll be re-adjusting with new owners. Better she do it where she’ll be happier in the long run. If you don’t like that, tough. She’s a cat. She’s not a baby. I’m doing my best for her under the circumstances. But NEVER, EVER will my cat’s needs take precedence over my child’s. And don’t worry – I have no future plans to adopt. The felines of the world are safe from my clutches. If I didn’t care about her happiness, I wouldn’t have been searching for the past 7 months for a new home for her. For $25 I can take her to the local no-kill shelter, but I won’t. For free, I can let her roam the neighborhood and continue to live off the mice and moles she prefers anyway, but I won’t. My priorities aren’t screwed up. The priorities of everyone who read my story and still thinks I’m irresponsible are screwed up.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.13   Who passed out the Haterade?

      (Error: Already voted.)

      I’m glad you managed to turn this into something positive, Connie. Kudos on being able to put things into perspective so well.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 10:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #51.14   Caite

      Connie, we (the non crazy people here) support you. I’ve had to re-home pets before and though it wasn’t something I wanted to do, I would have been irresponsible and heartless if I hadn’t put the well-being of an animal I was responsible for ahead of my own wants/needs. Life happens and we have to adjust.

      I think it’s horrible that others took it upon themselves to berate you for doing what you thought was right and that in the end you felt you had to defend yourself. You don’t. Your coworker is totally an asshat and so are a lot of these posters.

      I love my animals and it’s important that people are responsible when it comes to caring for pets (spay/neuter, treat them well, keep them active and give them a good life). But really people?? There are many human beings that could benefit from your energy and passion. There are animals that could benefit from it. I think if we’re all being responsible here we should stop focusing on blame and obsessing about a situation and start to be proactive to correct things you feel like are injustices. So all you “Team Brian” people – get active with animal rights and local shelters. Foster animals or help find them new homes. Put your energy to good use so there’s a positive change rather than bickering and complaining. And just for you trolls out there, I do practice what I preach. Pursuing something you feel emotionally invested in is a very rewarding thing. I help people every day – it’s my career and passion and wouldn’t have it any other way.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 9:24 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #52   Jessica P.

    Nope. Nope nope nope. She is shirking responsibility for the cat by abandoning it. “Doesn’t do well indoors” is code for “scratches at my furniture, knocks things over, and meows at inconvenient hours”, which can be translated from Jerk to English as, “is a cat”.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 8:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.1   Silence

      Or translated to, “pisses in the laundry basket and on furniture, runs out the door, and gets in constant fights with other pets.”

      You’ve obviously never tried to convert a half-feral cat into an indoor cat.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.2   magen

      Or translates to take it out back and shoot it since it can’t learn to live indoors and instead of offering to take in the animal everyone instead says ridiculous things and makes asses of themselves :) If you freaks love cats so much take her damn cat and shut up.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:51 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.3   RubySun bang

      Which can be translated as ‘is a cat…. that really really wishes to be outside, like its ancestral kin’

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.4   Vulpis

      Which obviously means drug it to the eyebrows, much like we’re supposed to stuff kids who have some energy with Ritalin…

      Jul 27, 2012 at 2:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #53   Smokey

    I adopted a feral cat! He lived near a dumpster and was malnourished, flea filled and beaten regurlary by other cats in the area. He hated being indoors, did not like litter box…it took a lot of work! He is now sleeping on his window perch, has a great view of birds, eats the highest quality food, never misses the litter box and has no desire to leave the house! He is now a lap cat. Be responsible, put the work in.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 8:36 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #53.1   kermit

      This just in: not all cats are alike, even if they’re from exactly the same litter. Some cats indeed can’t be converted to being indoor-only, unless your idea of conversion is having the cat stone drunk and/or mellowed out on anaesthetics.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 8:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #54   Kim

    Color me completely un-surprised at the comments to this particular posting. I’m quite aware of how cynical I can be; otherwise the ignorance on both sides of this issue might be astounding to me.

    Pets aren’t human babies but they’re capable of just as much – or more – thought, pleasure, and pain. When you take a pet into your life, you should take it with the knowledge that – like with a human baby – you should do everything in your power to take care of it. Some countries don’t have the same issues with outdoor pets as the U.S. does (not only stray overpopulation but also the destruction of local wildlife), but the simple – and easily verifiable with the tiniest bit of research – fact is that outdoor pets have shorter lifespans. Another simple fact is that most pets these days are domesticated… meaning they’ve been molded over the course of hundreds of years to be adapted to living domestically (i.e. inside a home).

    “Cats are happier outdoors” is, unfortunately, almost always completely wrong, except perhaps in the case of a feral cat (which would not be a pet such as the one being given up in the note above). If a cat is given a proper amount of attention, a variable and rotating number of toys and distractions, and is taught to use a litterbox and claw on appropriate scratching posts, the vast majority of them will be perfectly happy, healthy, and – perhaps above-all – safe being entirely indoors.

    Too many people mistake a week or month of protest from a cat as a sign that they’re impossible to keep indoors. It can sometimes take many months – as well as many attempts to figure out the right schedule of playtime – before a cat acclimates to indoor living. I own a cat right now that spent its first few months ruining my sleep schedule by howling at the doors and windows during the night. He was perfectly pleasant during the day, even a lap-cat at times, but at night he would roam around howling. I found that giving him ample playtime before bed and leaving out plenty of toys in the evening (light-up and glow-in-the-dark) helped tremendously with this behavior; now he will only make a little bit of fuss perhaps once every few weeks if I’ve not given him enough attention before turning in.

    If it sounds like too much work, then maybe pets – and children – aren’t right for you.

    ALL of that being said (and I realize it was quite a lot and I’ll be lucky if anyone’s still following at this point), some cats never adjust. A very minute portion of cats are truly only happen when given free roam of a MUCH larger space than a small apartment. But it can take months of hard work before you can find this out.

    The problem is that we – as readers of this site – have no way of knowing what attempts Connie has made to keep the cat indoors. My cynical self would say she probably hasn’t made the attempts I’ve successfully made – it takes a lot of commitment and devotion to your pets, two things an unfortunately large number of pet owners simply don’t have – BUT I can’t allow myself to fall into the trap of simply assuming anything about a person I only know from a random comment on a random site on the internet. Without more intimate knowledge, I certainly can’t condemn Connie, and I won’t condone Brian’s behavior, either. If Brian cares for animals as much as his outrage suggests, one would think he’d put as good a face on the animal-transfer as possible so that Connie’s pet could find a new home when it’s apparent that Connie – for whatever reason – will no longer be taking care of it.

    So that’s my perhaps-too-thorough, expansive tuppence.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 8:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #54.1   Pit Pat

      THANK YOU for your last paragraph. I read a lot online (funny stuff, news, advice columns, etc, including comments), and one thing that drives me nuts is how judgmental people can be when they only have a little information. It’s particularly bad with the advice columns. A stay-at-home mom who says she doesn’t have time to write her husband’s work thank-you notes (I forget what it was for) suddenly becomes an entitled, wealthy woman who spends her days playing tennis and getting mani/pedis while her kids watch TV; man whose wife cheated on him is a doormat and an idiot b/c he is trying to stay with her and work it out; etc. It’s one thing to say “I wonder if…” and it’s quite another to assume the worst of people. Why do we *want* to assume the worst of people? What do we get out of it??

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #54.2   Strawberry Creme

      So in other words, you tortured the cat until it broke and now willingly stays a prisoner. That sounds like a great idea!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #54.3   RubySun bang

      Yeah, it sounds like animal cruelty to me personally.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #54.4   shepd

      My cat did the same thing and I kept it indoors as a willing prisoner. Why?

      Cats are stupid. They’re fun. They’re nice. They keep the mice out of the house, but ultimately, they’re really, really, really stupid.

      How do I know this? My previous cat, which died at the ripe age of 18, was an outdoors cat. It ate various things leading it to get worms multiple times. It even managed to get infested by a botfly that tried to exit via her neck (it wasn’t successful and required surgery to remove). It would purposely find other animals to get near and then it would get angry as hell at them, risking its own life for no good reason at all (animals such as large dogs). She wouldn’t give up until the other animal would get to the point of chasing her. The various things eaten outside led to severe constipation that made neither the cat nor me happy. And it would be so stupid it wouldn’t come indoors at night in the middle of a freezing winter (this would happen all the time, even after we started giving up and leaving it outside).

      So, yeah, this one is staying indoors. It’s 3 years old and has had no problems apart from us finding out he’s allergic to fish and wanting to be an idiot outdoors. My 2 year old daughter would love to be outside unsupervised, but she’s also lacking the know-how to keep herself from being hurt, so I keep her a willing prisoner if I have to be inside. Sometimes you have to give tough love.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 7:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #54.5   Vulpis

      ‘Willing’ is the part I’d not necessarily agree on. I also wouldn’t necessarily agree on the ‘stupid’ part, but that varies from cat to cat same as it does for humans. Then again, my longest experience was with a cat that was both indoor *and* outdoor (got her after she’d been left at a local farm’s roadside produce stand, and she roamed outside as much as she stayed in the house.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #54.6   Kim

      Haha, Strawberry and Ruby, I have to wonder what world you live in where tons of toys and treats and playtime and attention amounts to “torture” and “cruelty”!

      Speak to any veterinarian (the people who are trained to know what’s good and healthy for animals) about the cat treatment I set forth and ask their opinion of whether it amounts to “torture” and “cruelty”. Please. I beg you. Just so you’ll be more informed. This is not a feral cat I was talking about; he is neutered and was clean and otherwise healthy when he started hanging out near my place, and came to my doorstep looking for attention every day. I partly took him in because he wouldn’t stop lazing around under my car. It’s absolute “torture” for him to have a safe, weather-free, flea-free, car-free, dog-free, other-diseased-cat-free (as other cats can carry FIV and FelV, diseases that can be passed on via bites and even water and food-sharing, respectively), food-and-toy-filled shelter for the rest of his life, I’m sure.

      I’m no stranger to the “cats are happier outdoors” argument. You clearly didn’t read (or absorb) my entire post before passing judgement. I’ll reiterate (and most vets will tell you this): most cats are domesticated. This means they have been bred and molded to live strictly indoors. It’s safer and healthier for them to do so, and as their caretaker, it’s my responsibility to make sure they live safe and healthy lives. It really is that simple.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 3:12 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #55   Madame

    Brian’s e-mail in not passive-agressive but agressive. In a work area like my work environment, it would have meant an employee fault. Wathever domestic pet means for people.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 8:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.1   kermit

      ag·gres·sive   [uh-gres-iv] Show IPA
      characterized by or tending toward unprovoked offensives, attacks, invasions, or the like; militantly forward or menacing: aggressive acts against a neighboring country.
      making an all-out effort to win or succeed; competitive: an aggressive basketball player.
      vigorously energetic, especially in the use of initiative and forcefulness: an aggressive salesperson.
      boldly assertive and forward; pushy: an aggressive driver.
      emphasizing maximum growth and capital gains over quality, security, and income: an aggressive mutual fund.

      Saying someone is abandoning their cat (whether that’s true or not) is not aggressive. Offensive to the person who he’s talking about? Sure. Aggressive? No.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 9:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.2   kathlynn

      actually it is. it first the first definition to a T. some one saying they are not able to take care of their pet because they are moving and cannot find a place to live with their cat. She did nothing that should have provoked the attack, which is what the email is.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:21 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.3   kermit

      Oh, it’s an attack is it, Kathlynn?

      Well then she should go right ahead and file a police report or a lawsuit. I’m sure the cops and the lawyers won’t laugh in her face.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.4   Ti

      Oh, you can conflate the generic use of “attack” with the legal definition of “attack,” kermit? That’s not intellectually dishonest at all!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.5   kermit

      Generic use doesn’t mean that you get to bastardize what words mean use “attack” and “insult” interchangeably. Words still have meaning outside of a court of law,even though Congress labelled pizza a vegetable.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.6   Ruth

      So why do they call them “attack ads”, for example? I don’t see them throwing punches. Words have meanings, and sometimes it’s not your personal preferred meaning which is superior to all other meanings. Get over it!

      Jul 27, 2012 at 5:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #56   Kathleen

    When your beloved outdoor cat steps into my fenced yard, you are risking its life. I don’t want your cat digging in my garden or pooping in my yard. I fully encourage my dogs to “get that cat”. And they do so joyfully.

    Please know too that they have their own beloved, strictly indoor cat that they would defend to their death.

    And let me add that as a Hurricane Katrina survivor who was there for the flood, I witnessed horrors with regards to pets left behind.

    As I told the Coast Guard “I go where my pets go”. End of story.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 8:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #56.1   Ti

      No, if my cat steps in your yard, my CAT is risking its life. As is its right being a full-grown, sentient being. Btw, you have a really bizarre worldview concerning animals. Your animals are precious, but you’ll encourage them to attack other animals? Your dogs are allowed outside, but your cat isn’t?

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #56.2   Jessi

      “And let me add that as a Hurricane Katrina survivor who was there for the flood, I witnessed horrors with regards to pets left behind.

      As I told the Coast Guard “I go where my pets go”. End of story.”

      Yeah, I had a friend who tried to do the same thing. They shot her pets.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #56.3   Vulpis

      Hmm. I’ve known some cats where if you set your dogs on them, you’d be risking the dogs. Heck, the indoor/outdoor cat I had *chased* dogs. And by your own lights–if your dogs ever made the mistake of setting foot outside of their yard, everyone around would be within their rights to smash them with a baseball bat? Sounds like a disgustingly hypocritical worldview, there. Not to mention that someone willing to treat other people’s pets that way generally are *not* good neighbors to have, since that sort of view tends to extend to other belongings than just the pets, as well.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #56.4   AnimalLover

      @56.2 I’m so sorry for your friend whose pets were shot by the Coast Guard. That is simply horrible. Following Katrina, Congress passed the Pets Evacuation and Transportation Standards Act of 2006. FEMA has developed new policies so that people in a disaster will no longer be forced to abandon their pets. Something for pet owners in the U.S. to know.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 3:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #56.5   Jessi

      @AnimalLover, thank you for the information! I will be sure to pass it along! :-)

      Aug 1, 2012 at 3:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #57   Captain Hampton

    Even if you marry your cat, statistics show that the relationship has about a 41% chance of ending in separation.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 9:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #58   Bluecanary

    It’s bad enough working as a shelter volunteer, seeing the tons and tons of unwanted animals dumped by some loser after they got boring or inconvenient for them, and knowing that the fact is most of the adult animals just won’t find homes again ever. But what gets really annoying is, once word gets out that you’re an “animal lover” and affiliated with an animal rescue organization, every idiot with ears at your job/in your neighborhood is suddenly like “Hey, I have this animal that I can’t be bothered to take care of anymore, do you think that YOU might know someone I could dump it off on?” So yeah, team notewriter all the way.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 9:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #58.1   Jessi

      I work in a retail chain of stores for pets and we get animals abandoned at my job all of the time. When I tell people I don’t work with about it, the response is almost always, “Well, at least they took it to [blank].”

      No! We’re not a shelter! Purposefully abandoning an animal with us is like purposefully abandoning a kid at Toy R’ Us!

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #58.2   Bluecanary

      People are constantly leaving boxes of kittens everywhere this time of year, at the park where my boyfriend works and outside the front gate of the shelter when it is closed. They are apparently too stupid to realize that kittens that are still nursing need to stay warm and eat a lot. Usually, by the time someone finds them, most of them are dead. Nothing brightens ones day quite like a cardboard box full of dead kittens. I’ve been at the shelter on days when me, one other volunteer, and the shelter owner have had to bottle feed 200 kittens. This same shelter has over 500 cats right now, most of them adults, most of which will live at the shelter the rest of their lives because nobody wants them. I’m not saying that there are not good reasons to rehome a pet, or that rehoming a pet makes you a bad person. However, if I see one more yuppie soccer mom drive up in her huge SUV full of brats, dumping off cats and dogs at the shelter with the lame excuse, “well, we’re moving..” I might go postal. I’ve moved 4 times in the last three years, and my pets have gone with me every time. It’s not that freaking hard.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 8:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #58.3   Vulpis

      So you’d rather have someone dump them on you at your job, or worse just plain abandon them outright, instead of asking your advice on how to responsibly find them a home where they’ll be happy?

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:12 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #58.4   Bluecanary

      Did I say I’d rather have that happen? Where, exactly? I think I come off pretty clearly as anti dumping your pets on my doorstep, thanks. What I’d really like is for people in general to take some responsibility for their animals instead of treating them like battery operated amusements that can be thrown in the trash when it’s convenient. I never said this woman was wrong for doing what she’s doing, only that I understand the frustration of her animal lover co-worker who probably gets hit up all the time, as do I, by people who need to dump their pet. For all of you people who are having trouble understanding those of us who are having a strong reaction to this post, might I suggest that you get the hell off the computer and trot on down to your local no kill shelter and volunteer for a few hours. I’m sure they’d be desperate to have you, and it might give you a little perspective about how absolutely annoying it is to live in a world where so many people see nothing wrong with treating animals like garbage. I bet email writer Brian has seen his share of it, which is probably the reason he was so snarky in his email.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 4:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #58.5   Haine

      Moving is not a lame excuse. Especially not with the way the economy is now. What, should somebody turn down a job they DESPERATELY need just to keep their pet? They might end up homeless but at least they didn’t ‘abandon’ their pet.
      Or they can’t afford rent or their house was foreclosed on so they need to move somewhere where they are not allowed to have pets. I guess they should just live on the streets or out of their car til they find a place that allows pets and that they can afford a pet deposit on… Or maybe just keep their pet illegally, because that can’t possibly end badly.

      Do you know or even care how judgmental you sound? “yuppie soccer mom with an SUV full of brats”, who the hell are you to judge when you don’t even know them or their circumstances?

      Jul 29, 2012 at 3:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #58.6   Haine

      Also I volunteer every weekend at an animal shelter and run a rat and rodent rescue as both of local shelters either do not accept rodents or have a policy of killing them if they’re turned in.

      I know how awful it is seeing the hundreds of animals needing new home who probably won’t get them, and I am a strong spay/neuter advocate. But sometimes people fall into bad circumstances and can’t keep a pet through no fault of their own.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 3:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #59   Pit Pat

    Read about half the comments, have 1 thing to say that’s probably not adding anything new to the discussion, but still feel compelled to share.

    I had neighbors whose cat “did not do well indoors.” This cat literally bounced off the walls – darting frantically all over the apartment, jumping on their heads, banging into stuff and crying. So they decided to try the indoor/outdoor thing, and the cat was fine. Yes, it meant he was at risk for getting hit by a car, but he was obviously miserable/crazy if kept inside all the time. Sure, some people don’t try hard enough and some cats do adapt, but some people DO try and some cats DON’T adapt. Personally, living in an urban environment, I think cats should be kept inside, but I also believe there are exceptions. And I don’t know much about medicating pets, but I would probably try the indoor/outdoor thing before I would medicate my cat.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #60   Michelle

    My next door neighbor has an outdoor cat who is the sweetest thing. She knows her name and when I say it she comes to me (even when she’d previously been heading a different direction) and rubs against my legs, sits in my lap, and loves being pet. I see her all the time sitting on my neighbor’s porch, on my porch, or wandering around the half a block closest to her home. We live in a city, so there are no coyotes or other predators, and I’m not sure if she ever crosses the street, but if she does, she’s smart enough to avoid the cars. She’s well-fed and well-loved. Being an outdoor cat doesn’t mean that a cat is wild, or feral, or a stray that someone regularly feeds, or mistreated in any way. Some cats are just happy living part of their lives indoors and part of their lives outdoors, just as humans are.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #60.1   Jessi

      Coyotes actually do quite well in a city environment. They are, in fact, one of the only species of animals to actually thrive since humans came to the Americas.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #60.2   Penny

      Um, Jessi, By ‘humans’ do you mean Europeans?

      Jul 27, 2012 at 6:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #60.3   Valerie

      Humans. There’s a theory that the earliest Americans wiped out a lot of the native fauna, either by hunting with fire and stampedes, or by importing disease, or both. It’s controversial, of course, but it’s a real area of study.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #60.4   Jessi

      @Penny, no, I meant humans. Just because the people who walked over from the Eurasian continents eventually became the Native American tribes we know today who respect nature and don’t hunt animals to extinction, that doesn’t mean they started out that way.

      Like Valerie pointed out, there’s a theory that the arrival of humans in the Americas drove a lot of animals to extinction.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 12:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #61   Polly

    Okay, well then enough about Connie.
    Let’s talk about Brian for awhile. Hope the dude isn’t in customer service, or anything to do with pleasing or being tactful with clients.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #61.1   The Elf

      Lol, true! No matter how much you may sympathize with Brian’s point, he said it very poorly.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 11:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #61.2   The Elf

      Sorry, Gigglebrax Fail. That comment was supposed to stack under #61. Oops!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #62   mir

    At the people who said they’ll gladly quit their jobs if it means not being able to be with their pets… good if that’s a possibility for you, but for some others it’s just not. Jobs aren’t always easy to find nowadays, and if you’re struggling financially already it’s probably not a very wise choice to get rid of your current source of income unless you know you can definitely get a different job (and taking care of pets does cost money). Feel free to call it selfish, but between getting into a situation where I’ll struggle to support even myself, let alone my pets, or sending them to someone who’ll take better care of them? I’ll choose the latter.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #62.1   Vulpis

      Oh no! You’re obviously an evil monster for not having predicted your finances would take a downturn, and you should never ever have gotten a pet at all!

      …Danggit, now I need to get that mop again for that dripping sarcasm…

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #63   Kim

    Actually, I think her co worker is right. This woman comes across as an irresponsible bitch.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #63.1   Connie

      What’s more irresponsible than finding a new home for a pet? Assuming I’m an irresponsible bitch based on so little information. I am actually quite responsible, which is why I’m choosing to sell my home in the best interest of my family. I’m also choosing to find her a home that she can enjoy rather than forcing her to live an apartment she will hate. Circumstances change. I gave her a good home for five years, and I am doing my best to ensure she has a good life for the rest of her life. Scroll up to my previous posts if you want the full story. Carry on with your own assumptions if you don’t.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 12:24 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #64   AH

    Given how many cats get unceremoniously dumped every day for far lesser reasons, I’d say give this woman a break. Let’s focus on shaming the s***heads who think domestic housecats will survive just fine being “returned to the wild.”

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #65   Bookmark

    I’m sick of all the commenters here saying, “Anyone who doesn’t keep their cats indoors all the time is a monster!!!”

    You know what? You’re absolutely right. It IS dangerous outside. So I’m going to make my kids strictly “indoor kids”. God forbid they should ever get beyond the front porch, I’ll have to be sure to scoop them up if someone rings the doorbell so they don’t escape. You so called “parents”, who let your kids go to school? SHAME ON YOU. YOU MONSTERS. /sarcasm

    Cats aren’t stupid, they can be trained. For example, mine will sit far back on the sidewalk and wait until all cars are gone before crossing the street (though they rarely leave the property since we have a large yard and many trees – they typically only encounter streets when they are both on walks with me – yes, my cats like to walk with me). There’s rarely any traffic where I live and no large predators. There are tons of trees for them to climb if they feel even remotely threatened, and we have provided them with a few hiding places if they get scared and need cover in a hurry (which they’ve never in their five years needed to use but for playing ‘hide and pounce’ with one another). My cats have a ten-hour-window during the daylight hours where they can come and go from the house as they please. If that means that there’s a small chance they might live a few years less, but are infinitely happier, then I feel I’m doing right by my cat. I’m sure I’d live longer if I never left my home, too, but I’d rather be happy than live a long and boring life.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #66   deprogrammed

    Sometimes people with pets go overboard. If you think your pets are your children, fine; but when you check out reality you’ll discover it’s possible to have a pet AND kids and know the difference between the two.

    Do you scruff you kids? Do you lick them to bathe them? Do you cook for your cats and read to them before they go to sleep?

    And if you are crazy enough to turn down a job because you can’t find a place to live that accepts pets then you will be the crazy homeless cat lady who scares kids.

    It’s OK to love your pets to bits. But don’t be stupid about it.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:48 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #67   Silence

    If we’re going to pass out sedatives to all the outdoor cats we’re trying to bring indoors, can we also pass them out to most of the people who’ve commented?

    You people scare me with your viciousness.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 12:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #67.1   H for Toy

      I don’t think I was too vicious in my comments, but I’ll take some sedatives anyway!

      Jul 26, 2012 at 1:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #68   Sasha

    So since Brian is clearly The Greatest Pet Owner of All Time, why doesn’t *he* take the cat and then send a self-congratulatory email about his good deed?

    Jul 26, 2012 at 1:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #68.1   Valerie

      Yeah, or for that matter, what about all these people posting nasty comments? Not ONE of them has said, “Hey Connie, maybe we can help find a home for the cat!”

      Nope, not one of them is willing to do more than make abusive posts.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #68.2   magen


      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #68.3   The Elf

      I’ve already got four, all rescues or strays! I’m pretty sure that a fifth would put us firmly in Crazy Cat Couple status. I do my part.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #68.4   Rattus

      Hey, The Elf, that made me laugh. Two months ago we had three cats and a visiting stray. While we were pondering what to do about him (shelter,adopt? shelter, adopt?), my firm stance was that, given our lifestyle and finances, three cats was sufficient and four would put us into Crazy Cat Couple territory. So of course, now our vet, the neighbours and my sister know us as the Crazy Cat Couple.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:21 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #68.5   AlfaCowboy

      Of course, The Elf, you’re not being an A-1 jerk about it and calling Connie an irresponsible bitch or a piece of garbage for trying to find a new home for her cat. It’s funny how folks like you who actually DO do good are among the less judgmental folks on here.

      Okay…Enough being nice. Back to snark mode.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 3:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #68.6   Vulpis

      @Valerie I wish–geography notwithstanding, unfortunately I’m not in a place suitable (apartment-wise and financially) to keep a cat, and I’m well aware of it. Unfortunately, the few cat-owners that used to be around me have since moved, and everyone here now seems to have dogs.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #69   magen

    Really? Some of you are backing up this email? This person could just as easily throw that cat in a dumpster, at least they’re trying to find it a home. I mean, I say throw it a dumpster since cats are useless anyways, but hey.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 2:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #70   bruner

    boo, connie! you don’t give up children, do you? what a lame excuse!

    Jul 26, 2012 at 2:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #70.1   Ti

      What a lame post.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 10:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #71   Edwardpduck

    Team Brian. If this twat didn’t want to be called out for acting like a d-bag, she should have kept her submissions off P.A.N.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 2:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #71.1   magen

      Are you for real dude? I will drown her cat for her if she needs rid of it, how is that?

      Jul 26, 2012 at 2:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #71.2   Jitty

      Damn, you are rude. WTF.

      Jul 26, 2012 at 4:51 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #72   The Elf

    This is starting to get *nasty*.


    Jul 26, 2012 at 3:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #73   Ash

    As the owner of a cat and a dog I’m very much on the “pets are family” team, but I also think that not being able to give your pet what it requires to be both happy and healthy is a justifiable and respectable reason to find it a new home. Connie knows her own cat better than anyone else, and if she says this cat is miserable indoors I’ll believe her. I’m sure she didn’t make this decision without putting a lot of thought into it first, and whether you agree with her or not the fact that she’s trying to find the new home herself shows that she does care. If she truly didn’t care what happened, it would be much easier for her to drop her cat off at a shelter or just leave her behind after the move to fend for herself. Instead, she’s making an obvious effort to ensure that her cat continues to be cared for by someone who is better able to provide for her. Even though I can’t imagine giving away my own pets, Connie is trying to do what she thinks is best and I can respect that.

    Brian on the other hand just sounds like a self-righteous A-hole who needs to find a better outlet for his unsolicited opinions than a mass e-mail.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 3:34 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #74   eeepah

    Funny. If I let my dog roam around the neighborhood all the time, it would be apprehended by animal control and I would be fined for neglect. Totally ok if I do that to a cat, though. I’ll never figure that out.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 4:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #74.1   Chris Miller

      There’s a lot of outdoor cats that never leave the owner’s property, and even more dogs that are indoor/outdoor. It’s easier to fence in dogs (it’s *possible* with cats, but a lot more expensive and for some may require putting a roof on your yard) too.

      That said I actually know a dog that is sometimes allowed to come and go at will. She’s an extremely placid old dog who usually just lies at the bottom of the driveway enjoying the sun, but occasionally crosses the road to walk along the river bank. It’s a very quiet neighbourhood, and I honestly can’t see anyone who isn’t already scared of dogs being afraid of her. I’ve never even seen her bark, she’s just… slow and lovely and happy to get pats from people passing by. It’s definitely not something I’d recommend for 99.9% of dogs but it works for her.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 2:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #74.2   catsarepeopletoo

      Unlike cats, dogs can run after and attack people if left roaming the streets. That is why animal control laws like this exist.

      Dogs also can’t climb trees /fences or slip easily under bushes and such to escape harm.

      Pretty lame comparison.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 3:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #74.3   eeepah

      What’s pretty lame is that they both have an equal chance of getting smashed by a car.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 3:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #75   Michele

    My neighbor moved and couldn’t take his cat with him. Since I used to cat-sit when he would go on vacation, he asked if I could take her. I did and my neighbor moved. NO ONE in my family calls my neighbor and says he is terrible for moving and not taking his cat. Miss Kitty is well loved and happy with me. Actually, I feel lucky to get a beautiful, sweet older kitty to love.
    I am not sure how her looking for a new owner makes her lazy or a bad person.
    Also I live in a big city and I used to have a cat who let roam around outside. He was super happy. Outdoor cats aren’t the worst things in the world; abusing it, neglecting it or otherwise being mean to an animal is pretty high up there.
    To the owner of the cat: I hope you find a home for your cat that lets it roam around outside. Don’t take anyone’s comments seriously – do what’s best for you and your cat.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:18 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #76   juju-skittles

    Are we sure Brian isn’t the family dog?

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #77   unsatisfied

    jesus christ on a cracker, people….

    Jul 26, 2012 at 10:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #78   Mary

    I really can’t see what’s wrong with rehoming pets. I have fostered many dogs and found them new homes. To me, adopting a pet or rescuing them from a shelter to take care of it as long as you can is no different. I have adopted pets from other people that had to rehome them and never did it occur to me to judge them for giving up their pet.

    I also had a dog that cost me about an extra $800 a month in rent, thousands of dollars to move to Hawaii with us, caused damage to the houses, pissed in my baby’s room. In ten years, she never could be trained. There are times when it makes more sense to rehome a pet. Get a grip.

    Also, cat’s shouldn’t be outside? WTF? My sister’s cat is a hunter and she’d go absolutely nuts if she were trapped inside all the time.

    Jul 26, 2012 at 11:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.1   ano

      Same. My current pets are both rehomed from their previous owners. I don’t blame the previous owners. One got too old, the other moved over seas – so now they’re mine.

      And if I can no longer adequately care for them, I will give them a new home. While it doesn’t look to be a problem now, who knows what the future will bring.

      cats…i don’t like cats. my housemate has one. recently the law changed for cats to be indoor only. her cat shits everywhere, rips things up, harasses my pets, constantly meows, sheds fucking everywhere. it used to be a farm cat and now it’s indoors only. Driving me up the wall and i wish she’d get it a new home or move somewhere with it so it would be happy. miderable cats STINK.

      But no it’s her “baby” so it has to live in our tiny apartment destroying things and making the carpet smell.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.2   Jessi

      “Also, cat’s shouldn’t be outside? WTF? My sister’s cat is a hunter and she’d go absolutely nuts if she were trapped inside all the time.”

      A perfect example of why cats shouldn’t be allowed outside. The domestic cat is something scientists call an “invasive species”. They are not a predator which local populations of animals have evolved with and learned how to evade. They are also responsible for wiping out large populations of native species, if not the entire species.

      Huh. I just realized how much cats are like people.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.3   The Elf

      Ano, there’s this thing called a litterbox. Cats naturally want to bury their waste, so it’s not that hard to train the cat to the box, assuming that is the cat’s problem. First step is to fill the box with whatever the cat used in the outdoors. Loose dirt, probably. Seed the litterbox with a little of the cat’s poop (buried) to create the right scent. Then confine the cat to a small uncarpeted area – utility rooms or bathrooms are ideal. You only have to keep the cat in that area for a few days. This will leave the cat with no good options other than the litterbox. Clean it frequently, but always leave a tiny bit of poop in it. Once the cat uses the litterbox on a regular basis, gradually expand the area that the cat has access to, but keep the litterbox in the same spot. When the cat has the run of the entire apartment without accidents, you can now move the litterbox to wherever you want it. Make sure you show the cat where the box is. During this time, you can gradually mix in more standard litter (avoid ones heavy with perfumes as some cats don’t like those) and stop seeding the box with poop. The key is to do it in baby steps.

      Now, if your cat is peeing as a protest, or to mark territory from the other animals, it will be harder to get him to stop. Boy cats absolutely must be nuetered. They will mark territory as instinct and this urge cannot be curtailed. It will also make him calmer and easier to manage.

      Wherever the cat has peed on the carpet, make sure you thoroughly steam clean it. Get one of those urine finders to make sure you got it all. It’ll probably take a few times. One of my cats had a medical problem that made her pee inappropriately. I got very, very good at cleaning up cat waste so that the house doesn’t stink. It can be done! Thankfully, this cat’s problem was fixable and she hasn’t peed on the carpet since.

      The other problems you mention are probably fixable as well, but the bathroom habits are the biggest problem.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 7:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.4   Mary

      Give me a break. A neutered cat that brings home moles and snakes is not a danger to the habitat that is my sister’s yard. Now, I’ve lived in places where feral dogs or cats run rampant in large numbers, namely Hawaii and the Navajo Nation, and there you might have an argument.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 12:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.5   Mary

      “Ano, there’s this thing called a litterbox.”

      I’m sure she never thought of that. All this time, she’s been wondering why the cat’s not using the toilet.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 12:48 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.6   The Elf

      Sure Ano’s heard of it (that sentence was obviously a little flip). But does Ano and Ano’s roommate know how to train a cat to use a litterbox? That was the point of my post.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.7   Vulpis

      I’m reminded of the age-old question that women ask men, ‘Don’t you know how to aim?’… :-)

      There’s a difference between not knowing how to use the box and not *wanting* to use the box.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.8   The Elf

      Right – my point is that you can get a cat to *want* to use the litterbox. That’s what the training is about. You basically convince the cat to prefer pooping in a box vs. the carpet.

      Some cats, anyway. But you’ll never know if your cat is one of those until you try. Since it is illegal now for Ano’s roommate’s cat to be outside, why not try?

      Jul 27, 2012 at 4:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.9   Jessi

      “Give me a break. A neutered cat that brings home moles and snakes is not a danger to the habitat that is my sister’s yard. ”

      You know he stays in your sister’s yard how, exactly? Also, there are about 60-70 million known house-cats in the U.S. (who knows how many strays and ferals). Imagine how many animals your sister’s cat kills, and multiply it by, at least, 60 million.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 5:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.10   Kjeri

      Houses, driveways and gardens are also not native to environment. In cities and older suburbs, the current ecosystem evolved WITH house cats roaming about and hunting things.

      Grew up with two siamese cats who went in and out at will. They both lived to the ripe old age of 19 years. If I had a cat today, it would be very dificult for me to keep it inside. However, I probably would at this point with coyotes here in the US eager for a tasty feline treat.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 10:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #78.11   Jessi

      @Kjeri, you’re correct in comparing houses, driveways, gardens, cities and suburbs to house cats. All are responsible for killing off large populations of indigenous animals (if not wiping them out completely). I can’t really control where I live, just like I can’t really control the fact that my local provider of electricity doesn’t offer me any green options (I can complain, but that’s about it), but you know what I *can* control? When, where and how my cat (a species not native to the local environment) is allowed outdoors.

      “In cities and older suburbs, the current ecosystem evolved WITH house cats roaming about and hunting things.”

      So, your logic is that previous cat owners were assholes, so you should be allowed to be one, as well?

      Jul 31, 2012 at 3:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #79   fuckcats

    i would have taken that cat to a lake in a burlap sack.problem solved.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 12:35 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #80   ano

    wow some pet owners are crazy. Not all of us regard a pet as a replacement baby. Some of us will rehome it if we think we can no longer make it happy – not keep it miserable.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 1:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #81   AussieGuest

    Nope I’m with Connie. Brian sounds like a self righteous vegan PETA supporter.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 7:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #82   AussieGuest

    Nope I’m with Connie. Brian sounds like a self righteous vegan PETA supporter…I’m sure she’s (Connie) just trying to do her best in this big badass world

    Jul 27, 2012 at 7:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #83   Dana

    What’s with all the – 2cats aren’t meant to be outdoors” business ??

    Cats were domesticated from wildcats ! Every part of their anatomy and character is designed for hunting. They are primarily nocturnal – they poo in a litter box because they wish to mask their scent from predators – they are built for climbing, stalking, running etc. They were not designed to live indoors !!

    Is this a weird US thing because here in the UK the majority of cats are outdoors most of the time – and we have roads too !! any cat kept indoors is usually forced to do so by the will of the owner not the cat !

    Jul 27, 2012 at 9:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #83.1   Jessi

      You have roads? OMG! /sarcasm

      You also live in what is, basically, a giant garden (the U.S. version – I’m not just talking about your back yard). Y’all have managed to kill off all of the big predators an outside cat would have to worry about.

      High five for killing a bunch of native wildlife so that your pets can roam free!

      Jul 28, 2012 at 5:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #83.2   the ignorance on this post is depressing

      I would like to point out several things that are incorrect with your statement.

      1) The use of the ‘giant garden’ analogy is downright awful in terms of explaining your point. We still have cities and suburbs and rural areas, and each have their own hazards concerning domesticated animals.

      2) The last ‘big predators an outside cat would have to worry about’ were hunted extinct many centuries ago. Most of them disappeared after the Ice Age, when Britain became cut off from the rest of Europe. If you’re really in doubt, Wikipedia has a fairly trustable and comprehensive list of Great Britain’s extinct animals and the year of their extinction. Most of the modern-day (the last extinction was in 1950, I think) extinctions were due to urbanisation and industrialisation. I’m pretty sure you can’t blame modern-day domesticated animal owners for that – at least with relevance to the domesticated animal in question.

      3) We are actually quite proud of our wildlife and its abundance. That’s why we have the Wildlife Trusts, which have government backing. On a slight side note of English pride, the percentage of forest in the UK has doubled since World War I, and we have also had several successful reintroductions of species that were once extinct in the UK.

      4) All of this presumes that domesticated cats have a severe impact on the environment, when there are many other factors that do more damage and are usually caused by humans!

      So I come to 5) Jessi, please get your head out of your ass, and stop making assumptions and accusations without backing them up.

      And I think that goes to virtually everyone on these comments, who have judged one or more of the people on these notes without bothering to think it through.

      TL;DR Where is the evidence for this statement?

      Aug 15, 2012 at 6:12 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #84   just me

    Is it just me, or are these comments really not funny?

    What happened? I come to PAN for a chuckle and I get gnarled on instead – what’s wrong with this picture?

    This will probably stir up a whole ‘nother debate, but am I the only one who has noticed that folks so passionate about animal rights are usually pro-abortion as well?

    Funny, right?

    Jul 27, 2012 at 9:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #84.1   Vulpis

      Dunno about pro-abortion as such, but pro-Choice, definitely. Though some of the reasons are actually similar–if for whatever reason you’re not capable of taking care of them, either make sure they’re placed with someone who can, or try not to have that problem in the first place.
      Though I do sometimes wonder why Bob Barker and friends never push the ‘Remember to spay and neuter your children’ thing…

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:34 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #84.2   Cytherea

      So ironic. You are absolutely right about that.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 7:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #85   Minea

    Definitely team Connie!
    What a bunch of nutcases some of you are on here. She’s doing the right thing for her cat, and here you are acting as if she said she’d kill it.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 10:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #85.1   kermit

      Enough with the fucking personal insults already.

      If you can’t express your disagreement without calling other people names, shut the hell up. In any other forum you people would be banned.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 10:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #85.2   AlfaCowboy

      Are you serious Kermit? “Nutcases” is extremely mild compared to what the wackadoo cat people have been calling Connie. The vitriol being directed at someone who is trying to find a positive and humane solution for her pet certainly makes me think the authors are unbalanced. Also, I suppose it’s much more appropriate to drop f bombs and tell people to shut up. Good grief.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 12:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #85.3   Poltergeist

      It’s not an insult (a very tame one at that) as much as it is a fact.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #85.4   Stacey

      Kermit, I would very much like it if you would take your umbrage out on the commenters above us who are tearing Connie to shreds. If someone is going to come to a forum and call a stranger a c*** and a b**** over rehoming a cat? They are a nutcase, and that’s putting it kindly.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 5:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #85.5   Jessi

      I’m fairly positive that Kermit’s comment was aimed at everyone on the thread throwing insults about (myself included).

      Minea’s just seems to be the straw that broke the camel’s back.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 3:56 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #86   LuvsHorror

    Really, people? She’s doing the responsible thing and trying to find a good home for it. If a cat wants to be outdoors, it’s going to be outdoors. I tried my damnedest to keep one in, it kept running face first into the glass door. Gave up, and had a perfectly happy cat that could come and go as it pleases. I would prefer indoor, but I’m realistic. Brian is being a weepy jerk. If he is so concerned, he could politely help place the cat. He doesn’t have to be rude about it.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 11:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #87   Cara

    Reading all these comments about how there is no situation where you should EVER give up your pet makes me feel really sick…

    I had a cat from about age 10 to age 17 that I loved to pieces like she was my baby… Somewhere around the time she turned 7, she suddenly became extremely mentally unstable and vicious and would attack me on a regular basis. I still have scars on my chin from when she would flip out and claw my face. She wasn’t attacking anyone else, just me… I never, ever abused her… We took her to the vet, and they said sometimes cats’ personalities change when they get older and there’s not much you can do.

    We had to keep her in the basement so she wouldn’t attack me. She was miserable down there…suddenly her free space was cut to a third of what it used to be. I would go down and visit her, and sometimes she was okay…sometimes she was insane…

    Finally I made the decision to get rid of her… We left her at a small shelter whose policy was to never put down pets, even if they had to keep them for the rest of their lives. I felt like that was the best we could do for her. The shelter later let us know that my kitty was adopted.

    It’s been 6 years, and I wonder all the time if she’s okay. I still have dreams about her. I’m still racked with guilt, like there was more that I could have done… Should I have looked further into getting her medication or therapy? Should I have just waited longer to see if she would get better? I hope that wherever she is, she’s happier and calmer, because I know keeping her was making her miserable…

    I know how horrible it feels to get rid of a pet. Shame on all of you for saying there is never a reason to give your pet away. There ARE situations where it is in the best interest of the pet to put them in a new home.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 12:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #87.1   Vulpis

      Ahhhhhmen. The problem isn’t with people having to give up their pets–it’s the ones that *do* get rid of them for frivilous reasons. Connie’s pretty obviously not one of those.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #88   mel

    1. Talking about giving up pets because of housing issues, financial problems, danger to kids, etc etc is IRRELEVANT. Why? Because we don’t have to guess on her reason. Her reason is stated in the OP: she doesn’t want an indoor cat. There. Done. That’s the reason.

    2. Yup, finding a new home is definitely better than just dumping the cat. My only sadness comes from the fact that she’s not going to find a new home (not with all of the endless breeding and dumping), which means she will ultimately either abandon the cat in the street, dump it at a shelter or take the cat with her.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 12:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #88.1   poltergeist

      She never said that she didn’t want an indoor cat. She said that her cat wouldn’t be content with being a strictly indoor cat, so it would be better to find it another home where it can go outdoors. Reading goes a long way.

      As for #2 – very nice assumptions. Nowhere does it indicate that she would simply abandon the cat in the street, and many, many people have been able to re-home their animals before, so your pessimism isn’t warranted.

      If you’re going to make a serious post, know what the fuck you’re talking about first.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #88.2   The Elf

      Honestly, odds aren’t good. If you’re going to predict what happens next, not being able to rehome the cat is a pretty good prediction. What Connie does or doesn’t do after failing to rehome the cat (if that turns out to be the case) is another story.

      Rehoming can be done (obviously), but there’s a reason shelters have a hard time adopting adult cats but not kittens. The older the cat is, the less adoptable it is. Five years is middle-aged. Better that than a 15 year old cat, but odds still aren’t good.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 1:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #88.3   Vulpis

      Bzzzzt. You need a Reading Comprehension 101 referesher here. Connie didn’t say she didn’t want an indoor cat, she said the cat didn’t want to *be* an indoor cat. Major difference.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #88.4   Bluecanary

      Personally, I don’t know Connie from Adam. This is the internet, remember? None of us know anyone. So yeah, she posts her friend’s email to PAN seeking validation, and instead gets a bunch of people up her ass. So she posts something that seems personally nice and reasonable, now that she’s got negative feedback, and everyone just falls all over themselves to assume that she’s just the best person ever because, hey, she wrote something nice on the internet. And nobody ever lies or misrepresents on the internet, right?

      Everyone who ever gets rid of a pet has some sob story reason that they’re more than happy to tell you about. Sometimes there are real legitimate reasons to rehome, and not everyone who rehomes a pet is a bad person. But I have seen myself personally over a 10 year period now, that most of the time, people who are dumping their pets are doing just that…DUMPING them. They might have an excuse, but it’s usually flimsy. Usually it amounts to, whatever the situation with the pet, fixing it requires too much effort, and it’s just easier to give the animal up. And assuming she does not find the cat a home, if it ends up in a shelter, the cat who just does not like being indoors will spend the rest of its life in a tiny cage because nobody wants an adult cat.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 4:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #89   Anitsisqua bang

    Well, I think sometimes, cats are better as outdoor cats. A few years ago, I trapped a litter of feral kittens and had them all spayed (It was a litter of 5 girls. What are the odds?) Anyhow, all of the ones that were docile enough to be found homes were, but two of the kittens were too anxious to be housecats. They were nervous indoors and would just hide all day, reluctant to come out even to eat. They were gradually introduced to the outdoors and are now happy, active barn cats. I feed them every day, and they are so much more calm and gentle and receptive to human contact than they ever were indoors. I know that some people don’t think pets should ever be outdoors, but they were miserable there.

    …And in case anyone thinks that is just an excuse, I also have an indoor dog and cat that are perfectly happy to be indoor pets.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 1:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #90   I have an IDEA!

    First off: To each his own.

    To Connie:
    Good for you for doing the right thing and working to find a solution that fits into your life. (Yes this comment has so far vilified me and not said anything new.)

    Now, to all the Haters:
    How about you put your money where your mouth is. If Connie is so horrible, why don’t you SAVE that poor, defenseless kitty and give her/him a new home? Since you are all such wonderful pet activists, it should be very easy for you to take the cat on and ‘train’ it to fit into your life. If you have enough time to trash an unknown person based on the TINIEST bit of information, then you definitely have the time to arrange to take a new ‘family member’, ‘fur-kid’, ‘fur-baby’, or whatever else you want to anthropomorphize this animal as. I bet Connie would be delighted that someone is willing to help her out in this situation, and based on your comments, she would know that the cat will be well looked after as you are all such amazing pet owners yourself.

    All it takes is one person to make a POSITIVE difference here.

    (And before the hate starts piling in on me, I am a cat owner. And have been all my life. I love my current cat–a product of re-homing–but I also understand that she is an animal, and that my husband and son are more important. And if that turns me into the She-Devil incarnate, then so be it. And as for the trolls, it’s too bad you don’t live off kappa anymore.)

    Cheers all.

    And good luck to Connie in her situation. I hope that a positive solution for all involved can be found.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 1:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #90.1   Vulpis

      Or better yet, they can all send Connie money so that she can get the larger place she was looking for to begin with before having to settle for the smaller apartment that’s causing all this fracas in the first place.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #90.2   I have an IDEA!

      Another excellent idea.


      Jul 27, 2012 at 3:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #90.3   Who passed out the Haterade?

      This is a great idea in theory, but I’m not so sure about the results in practice… I mean, if this is how they treat a fellow human being for doing something they don’t like, can you imagine how they would treat her cat when they find out the hard way that she was right about the cat’s behavior when forcibly kept indoors?

      Jul 27, 2012 at 10:51 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #91   Crystal

    I care more about animals than people. Even baby people.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 3:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #92   Gladys Gravyboots

    Connie, not sure what kind of area you live in currently, but maybe your cat would be happy as a barn cat? Maybe put up some notes at a farm supply co-op/feed store – many folks in suburban/rural areas welcome outdoor cats to keep rodent populations in check.

    Maybe someone else suggested this already, but wading through the awful comments was tiresome… There is a suitable home for your kitty out there Connie, you just might have to get creative – good luck to you & your kitty!


    Jul 27, 2012 at 4:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #93   Ray

    Just thought I’d drop a comment to remind you guys that outdoor cats are an invasive species that cause the loss of countless indigenous wildlife.

    I love my cats but its not fair to let them decimate the populations of natural wildlife.

    Most of the time its just common birds, but when you have rare migrating birds coming through your area picked off by your cats, you really hurt the environment.

    not that anybody gives a shit


    Jul 27, 2012 at 7:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #93.1   Lil'

      My cat doesn’t fly, so we’re good.

      Jul 27, 2012 at 8:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #93.2   Jessi

      But, according to Mary (comment 78.4):
      “Give me a break. A neutered cat that brings home moles and snakes is not a danger to the habitat that is my sister’s yard. Now, I’ve lived in places where feral dogs or cats run rampant in large numbers, namely Hawaii and the Navajo Nation, and there you might have an argument.”

      I don’t think that Mary realizes that the Navajo Nation is on the mainland and that their dogs and cats don’t recognize boundaries. Nor do I think she understands that Hawaii is an example of what can occur on the mainland if we don’t stop people from allowing their cats to roam free.

      Jul 28, 2012 at 5:33 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #94   Lou Lou

    I feel Brian’s frustration. My pets fall in line after a very short list of people in my life. They are members of my family, and it wouldn’t even cross my mind to rehome them.
    However, some animal lovers need to come off this pet=baby mentality. In general, people who have had children will never agree with you on this. There is a biologically ingrained obsession with the well being of your child that perhaps you can not understand until you are compelled against your will to watch them breathe all night. I know this because I too was under the delusion that the deep and real love I had for my pets must be the same feelings people have for their babies. I have since procreated and if I had to, I would always choose the well being of my child over not just my pets, but any other person on this planet.

    Jul 27, 2012 at 11:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #95   Pumpkin3.14

    ^254 reasons why I have a dog.

    Jul 28, 2012 at 12:11 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #96   Pants

    I may not live in the US, but it does annoy me when my naighbors cats poop in my garden, stress my dog (who is fenced in), kill our birds, fight under my bedroom window at 2 am, kill the baby birds in my trees and disrupt traffic. People would never put up with that level of harrasment from a dog!

    I like cats, but people need to take more responsibility over the animals they buy. My dog lives behind a fence, and is walked on a leash (let off in dog parks) – the same should not be impossible for cat owners.

    I know a few cat owners who let their cats out in home built aviaries. Absolutely genius! The cats get out, they can climb and get some fresh air, but they are safe, and so is the wildlife.

    And honestly, if you dont have space for a cat (or a dog, or any animal) – don’t buy one.

    Jul 28, 2012 at 2:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #97   Sam

    Cats shouldn’t roam free because they decimate the songbird population. If I see an unattended cat, I call animal care and control since its illegal for cats to roam free. Calling animal care is best for the cat as its not safe to roam and best for the birds.

    Jul 28, 2012 at 5:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #97.1   Rattus

      Buildings kill more birds than cats do. What do you do about them?

      Jul 28, 2012 at 7:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #97.2   Toady

      Keep ‘em indoors.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 7:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #98   melly

    I’ve had 3 cats over the last 20 years. 2 were indoor/outdoor who switched (one happily, one not so) to indoor only after a move, the 3rd I got as a rescue already declawed and he’s always been an indoor. I say this b/c I love my kittes – they ARE like my family.
    HOWEVER – OP was TOTALLY doing the responsible thing here. She could have totally said “it’s an outdoor cat, it’ll figure something else out” but instead is trying to find a new caregiver for the kitty, so she OBVIOUSLY cares about him/her. I’ve always believed that the commitment of having a pet is taking the best care of it you can, and in this case that means finding someone else to do the caring.

    So lay off all you crazy cat people – you’re giving the rest of us a bad name.

    Jul 28, 2012 at 6:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #99   Liars Club75

    Came here hungry for butthurt, leaving bloated.

    Jul 28, 2012 at 7:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #100   AussieGuest

    I just hope that Connie doesn’t think we are all nuts reading all those comments

    Jul 29, 2012 at 4:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #101   Chris

    My neighbors used to have “outdoor” cats. This apparently means that your cat is free to roam other people’s yards. I used to have to clean up dead cats almost weekly, since my “outside, but stay in their own yard” dogs were faster and smarter than cats.

    Jul 29, 2012 at 6:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.1   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Whatever you may think of whether cats should be kept indoors, it’s kinda sad to be proud of your pets for killing other people’s.

      Scratch that, it’s really sad.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 1:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.2   Rattus

      It truly is. I’ve seldom been more appalled by anything I’ve ever read on this site, and there has been some appalling stuff.

      Jul 29, 2012 at 2:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.3   Jessi

      Where was Chris saying that he was proud of his dogs for killing the cats in his yard? He was merely pointing out a fact (that his dogs have killed “outside” cats before), and touching on something one or two people have said in the comments here (that their cat is “smart” and can survive in the outdoors).

      For instance, after a hurricane, the field behind my house got flooded, and the rodents who lived there moved into my backyard. My dogs killed them all before I even knew that they (the rodents) were there. They are terriers and that’s what they’ve been bred to do. Am I “proud” of them? No. Am I angry at them? No. Do I wish I could’ve stopped them? Yes.

      Statements of fact do not equal bragging.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 2:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.4   Who passed out the Haterade?

      “My neighbors used to have “outdoor” cats… since my… dogs were faster and smarter than cats.”

      It’s not “neener neener neener”, but it’s not a neutral statement of fact (let alone an expression of regret). It’s pride in their abilities and their “accomplishments”.

      FWIW, there have been some even-more-sad statements along these lines in this thread, and I’ve seen much worse in other threads. But I stand by my words, that expressing pride in your pets’ ability to kill other people’s pets is very sad.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 10:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.5   Jessi

      Awesome editing skills there, Who passed out the Haterade.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 4:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.6   Who passed out the Haterade?

      If you didn’t know, you’re unable to edit comments after a fairly short span of time. That time had long elapsed before you even made your first comment.

      Nice try, though.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 1:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.7   Jessi

      Yeah, I was talking about how you edited Chris’s comment, not your own.

      Aug 1, 2012 at 3:35 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.8   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Most of us call it “quotation”, but whatever floats your boat.

      Aug 1, 2012 at 10:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.9   AlfaCowboy

      Selective editing to help make your point.

      Aug 1, 2012 at 3:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.10   Jessi

      @Haterade, Using your methods, here’s a “quote” from MLK’s “I Have a Dream” speech:

      “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will… be judged by the color of their skin…”

      Aug 2, 2012 at 3:36 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.11   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Okay, I’ll bite: According to you, I changed the meaning of what he said. I’d love to hear you explain that position.

      In your example, it’s obvious that omitting “not” reverses the meaning. What critical words did I leave out, pray tell, that would prove he wasn’t stating that his pets were able to kill others’ pets because they were “smarter and faster” – i.e. qualities to be proud of?

      Aug 2, 2012 at 9:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.12   Jessi

      I’ve already made my point in my initial statement to you. What Chris said was a statement of fact, not an expression of pride.

      The way I usually share my hurricane anecdote is, “After Hurricane Ike, the field behind my house was flooded, so my back yard got inundated with rats and field-mice. They’ve never been trained to do so, but they did what they were bred to do, and quickly eliminated the problem.”

      You changed Chris’s comment stating that his neighbor’s cats would still be alive if they (the neighbors) weren’t jerks and allowed them (the cats) to wander freely into his backyard into a comment which sounded like he trained his dogs to go after cats. His dogs stayed on his property, their cats did not. Neither he nor his dogs are to blame.

      Again, statements of fact do not equal “pride”.

      Aug 4, 2012 at 2:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #101.13   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Loosely paraphrased, what I asked was “HOW did I supposedly change his comment?” It’s telling that all you do is repeat yourself again instead of answering.

      Stick a fork in me, I’m done.

      Aug 4, 2012 at 9:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #102   Beth

    Jeezus, what a bunch of judgmental wackos. I had an indoor cat who was overweight, sluggish, and miserable. I moved in with my partner, whose 2 cats were indoor/outdoor cats who spent lots of time in the back garden and rarely ventured beyond. My cat dropped a ton of weight and got a spring in her step. None of our 3 cats has ever had an injury or accident.

    Jul 29, 2012 at 10:03 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #103   Jaddi

    I have 7 rabbits (OK 6 one of them died two weeks aggo), and 7 Turtles. I live in a small house where there is much more place for all these animals than for me.

    When I moved in the house I had NO animals. Not one. I was not even thinking about getting one. And then the first Coworker came and asked me if I could take her rabbit because she has to move and cant take it with her. I never wanted a rabbit but I had the place so I took him. And then, over the years I got more and more rabbits (They are hopping auround my feet right now) – not because they got offspring, they all are rabbits from people who couldend buy food for them any longer or who cant take them to a new appartement.

    With the turtles it was the same problem – When you have water turtles you need a big tank that weights tons. Ok the former owners should have noticed that, but I have the place and no cellar so I could place a big tank.

    I am not a “crazy animal lover”, animals are animals. They live here in my house and thats it. And I really hope when the day comes and I have to move out (and it will come) that someone takes my turtles.

    They live so long that this day WILL come.
    For the rabbits I dont have this kind of fear – they live around 8 till13 years. So when I get old I wont take any more rabbits.

    And I hope I will finde someone who will help my who is not such a Drama Lama like Brian.

    Everyone who gave my his or her animal was CARING about it – they could have put the rabbits in the next park and the turtles in the next river. Many people do that.

    Thats stupid and cruel – because the turtles destroy the local Ponds, and the rabbits die fast.
    And the local shelters dont take turtles.

    If someone would come to me and ask if I could help find a place for a cat I would HELP and not send stupid eMails.
    (I cant take cats because rabbits and cats dont go well together…).

    And if no place could be found I would make a place for the cat in my storage room with one of this little doors for cats that she could get outside and then search on who would take ist for a longer time.

    Being so cruel to a Co Worker like Brian shows me that he has the social competence of a stone.
    Asking friends or Co workers to help find a place for an animal is a GOOD idea – saying that she should not move (I have read such posts here) or that she dont care for the cat ist some kind of strange for me.

    Sorry for my bad englsih and my long text folks. But I cant understand that it should be a mistake or false to search a new home for an animal when someone could not keep it any longer.

    Jul 29, 2012 at 11:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #103.1   Jessi

      “Everyone who gave my his or her animal was CARING about it – they could have put the rabbits in the next park and the turtles in the next river. Many people do that.

      Thats stupid and cruel – because the turtles destroy the local Ponds, ”

      “And if no place could be found I would make a place for the cat in my storage room with one of this little doors for cats that she could get outside and then search on who would take ist for a longer time.”

      So, you’re against releasing non-native turtles into the wild because of the damage that they do, but releasing non-native cats (meaning *any* domestic house-cat) into the wild is okay by you?


      Jul 30, 2012 at 2:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #103.2   Jaddi

      I dont know what Hypocrite means – is that your name?

      I did not want to start a discussion about “Are cats outside good or not” – When I would get a “outdoor cat” from someone to take care of – I would not try to force this animal to stay in the house.

      I HAVE problems with outdoor cats – they pee in my Carport Bookmarked ect. – but lock them away seems not to work. I talked with the owners and they say cats need the freedom to run free outside – I dont know much about ctas but here in this small village there where ALWAYS cats – and even that I have a small problem with a few of them: So what – the keep the mice popolation small and we have much mice and rats here. Not only one or two – the last winters where to warm and so mice are everywhere and the rats are sitting on the street at night – toatalle relaxed.

      So – in my optinion – cats BELONG to the “wild” of this small town – we have much little farms ect. with much mice ect. – I think these cats are needed.

      The other option would be Poison against the mice – well then I prefer the neighbours cats doing their job (and they do it).

      You compare two things that cant be compard.

      Here where NEVER turtles in the area but always cats.

      And I know there are areas on earth where cats are a big problem (Australia and some islands where cats never have been bevfore and now they kill everything they can get) – but turtles are not.

      EDIT: And I NEVER said: put the cat somewhere into the wild – kick it off gthe car in a wild area ect.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 3:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #104   Kirst

    We had a cat when I was a child. He was an indoor/outdoor cat. There was always a window open so that he could come and go as he chose, and he had several square miles of fields at the back of the house to stalk and hunt and play in. We went on holiday one year and left him in a good cattery at considerable expense. He was so miserable at being indoors that he bit his way out of the run three times. The cattery owner had to wire metal crates around the run to stop him biting through. He would have been unbearably miserable if someone had tried to make him be an indoor cat for the rest of his life.

    Jul 29, 2012 at 11:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #105   Katie bang

    Look, cats are not dogs. Most of them need to go outside, it´s just what they do. This woman obviously loves her cat. She´s moving somehwere where she can´t take it because it would be miserable and she´s looking for a new loving home for her cat. She must be heartbroken but she probably knows what´s best for the cat. Keeping it would be selfish and heartless.
    I think it´s rather hateful of some people here to accuse her of “throwing the cat aside”. She´s not. She´s doing what´s best for her cat: Finding a new loving and safe home. Cats are not babies. They are cats. They get used to new people easily and most of them don´t even care so much. Don´t compare them to children, it´s completely different.
    And if you really believe you can make a former outdoor cat into an indoor cat… you´ve never tried. It´s not possible. The cat will be miserable and sad all the time, trying to get back outside where it wants and needs to be. That´s just the way it is. Especially if “indoor” means a small apartment where it can´t even run and play.

    Jul 29, 2012 at 7:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #105.1   Jessi

      “And if you really believe you can make a former outdoor cat into an indoor cat… you´ve never tried. It´s not possible. The cat will be miserable and sad all the time, trying to get back outside where it wants and needs to be. That´s just the way it is. Especially if “indoor” means a small apartment where it can´t even run and play.”

      Hmm, I currently live in a one bedroom apartment with a formerly feral cat who isn’t drugged in any way (beyond the occasional cat nip). She seems to be doing just fine. If I don’t take her for a walk on a daily basis, she tends to go a bit nutty, but my dogs are the same. The major differences between my dogs and my cats are that my cats require a much longer walk to satisfy them (almost an hour an a half compared to my dogs’ 45 minutes)*, my cats have yet to be trained to not wander aimlessly (I don’t think they can be, honestly) and, finally, once my dogs have done their business outside, then they’re done. My cats? Not so much.

      *The really irritating thing? I go for more than 2 hours worth of walks a day (not to mention how much I walk working retail) and I’m still not thin!

      Jul 30, 2012 at 3:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #105.2   The Elf

      Three of mine were born outdoors, the fourth spent significant time as a stray. They all do fine indoors.

      It can be done. It doesn’t always work, but it is possible.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 7:03 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #105.3   Katie

      Oh, okay. :-) I´ve tried only once and my cat went completely crazy. She would hang from the screen door by her claws and scream all the time. It was heartbreaking and in the end we let her go out again. It probably depends on the cat then.

      Jessi: I´ve tried walking my indoor cat once and he somehow managed to free himself from his harness and sneak off to hide under a bush while I was talking to a friend for like a minute. He´s afraid of the outdoors and actually runs into the opposite direction whenever I open the front door. Too bad, I would have loved to walk him.

      Goes to show all cats are different. :-)

      Aug 1, 2012 at 10:11 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #105.4   Jessi

      Katie, yes, all cats are different. All should be leashed (or otherwise confined) if they’re going outside.

      I’m not sure what you’re point really is. Sorry, I’m a bit under the weather right now and don’t have my Reading Comprehension hat on right now.

      Aug 2, 2012 at 3:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #106   Paradox

    I’m Team Connie. I feel awful for this woman that has to leave her pet behind, but sometimes you just can’t help it. I’ve been in the situation before where you have absolutely NO other choice than to find your pet a new home. At least she’s trying to find it a nice new owner, and not just dropping it at the shelter or abandoning it on the roadside. The point is, it’s a cat. Not a baby. Not a human being. A cat. A cat that she has lovingly cared for for several years, but can no longer do so, and is trying to do right for. A cat that will do just fine adopting whatever kind person she finds that will feed it. If the cat doesn’t do well being inside all the time, then moving it for it to be permanently inside a tiny apartment would be torture for the poor thing. Some cats don’t do well as indoor-only cats. My outdoor cat won’t stay inside for more than an hour. If you lock her inside, she becomes very mean, swiping at, biting, or clawing anyone who comes near her until she is let back out again. That’s her personality. She lived outside all her life as a stray until she adopted us 6 years ago, and became a permanent resident of our front porch. And she’s perfectly happy that way.

    Jul 29, 2012 at 10:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #107   Mika

    Sometimes people who have seen a lot of animals abandoned can get a bit nuts about anyone who has to give up an animal, but so many people here are just taking this way too far.

    I’ve worked in shelters and rescue organizations, and the people who don’t care aren’t the ones looking for new homes for their animals. I got my last cat because a woman was refusing to give up her animals because “it was cruel”, as so many people here are saying, and instead the golden retriever she had weighed 30 pounds and had only eaten a sweet potato in the past two weeks, and the cat was 4 pounds (and was normal at around 15). The cat had such bad malnutrition that its legs were warped and its voicebox or whatever had infected and rotted out so it couldn’t meow. She couldn’t afford to take the animals to the vet, or feed them, but she insisted that it was crueler to give the animals away or bring them to a shelter. Luckily, someone saw the cat and the animals were seized, but yeah, people do take this way too far.

    On the other hand, one woman came into the shelter to give up a 150 pound american bulldog. Coming in to the shelter, she was maybe 5 feet tall, noticeably pregnant, crying about giving up the dog, and the shelter employees still started berating her about how she was awful for giving up the dog. When I took her aside to figure out what was up, I learned she had another kid at home, the dog had been her husband’s since before they got married, and he had recently been killed in a car crash. She was broke because she was out of work from the pregnancy, and the dog easily outweighed her, making it pretty unsafe to walk him when she was already having a complicated pregnancy. So, she had to give the dog up. Nonetheless, even learning this, so many employees of the shelter kept on making snide remarks and generally being awful towards the woman. It was absolutely horrifying. I always figured that people being nuts about these things, saying there’s no good reason would understand that sometimes, there’s no other option, but apparently so many people will just keep going with this until the bitter end.

    I don’t know, I really think a lot of people in here need to step back and reevaluate their thinking. I thought for such a long time that there was no good reason to give up an animal, but after actually seeing a couple of these cases, realized I was talking from a completely blinkered viewpoint. Please just consider that other people do love their animals, and they actually do want what’s best for both them and the animals. It’s the people who don’t make these judgement calls that are dangerous to the animals.

    Sorry for ranting. So many of these posts just… hit a nerve.

    Anyways, best of luck, Connie. All I can suggest is asking the employees of local shelters and pet shops if they know of any people who are good at finding homes. I commonly work for a woman who makes sure to find homes or workable solutions for people with animals that they have to rehome, and maybe there’s someone near you who does the same, or can at least give you some good leads.

    Jul 30, 2012 at 12:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #107.1   Valerie

      @Mika, you’re definitely a voice of reason! People chanting “You must keep the animal for ever and ever” like it’s religious dogma aren’t doing anybody a bit of good.

      We live out in the country, where all the people who don’t want to disturb the shelter volunteers drop their animals to starve.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 10:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #107.2   Gladys Gravyboots

      Valerie, I too live in the “country” (actually, unincorporated county on the outskirts of a small city, but whatever) and I think the sweet, young, un-neutered male tabby adopting himself into our household was dropped off to make his own way in the wild.

      The main reason he was starving was because he was riddled with parasites. That’s REAL pet dumping for y’all.


      Jul 30, 2012 at 12:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #108   Jeff S.

    My fiancée and I live in Brooklyn and “rescued” (such a dramatic word) a cat that had been found by a friend of a friend walking the streets of midtown Manhattan. Saks (named because he was found on Fifth Avenue) was a rambunctious cat. We “rescued” a dog soon after, and the two of them entertained each other for a while, but Saks desperately wanted to get back out into the world.

    Our apartment had a back yard that was basically at basement level, surrounded by what seemed to be an unscalable wall, so we used to let Saks explore back there. Eventually, of course, he learned to make a 6-foot vertical leap from a fence and escape. After trying various methods to prevent his escape, we decided to ban him from being outdoors. He retaliated by peeing everywhere, scratching up furniture, and complaining non-stop. We wondered if he would be happier upstate at a horse farm we knew about.

    Eventually, after a lot of discussion and soul-searching, we gave up and let him be what he wanted to be: an indoor-outdoor cat. It was not an easy or callous decision. But he was much happier. We would see him when we were walking the dog, and he was excited to see us outside the apartment. He would follow us home and enter through the front door. I could see firsthand how savvy and cautious he was.

    When we moved to a new apartment on the fourth floor of a brownstone, we were worried about what would happen. We decided on a cat door in the window where the fire escape was. Were we crazy? No. He LOVES it. He comes and goes as he pleases, occasionally getting into expensive trouble — he sometimes comes home with battle scars, and once broke his foot — but he’s always anxious to go back out again, coming back for affection, food, playtime with the dog, and epic sleep sessions.

    He’s neutered, microchipped, immunized, has a jingly collar to warn all but the slowest birds (he’s more of a rat man), and he has a tag with our phone numbers on it and the message “I like to roam.” We often get judgmental calls from neighbors who find him a block or two away, and we do our best not to get defensive about it.

    Of course we worry about him. But you know who else worries a lot? Parents. Parents have to eventually let their kids walk to the end of the block, go out with their friends, drive a car, go off to college. Their children’s safety is not guaranteed. No one’s is. If someone’s teenager got into a car accident, we wouldn’t tell the parents it’s their fault for letting their children out of the house, because that would be awful.

    My point is that it would be nice if we were all a little less judgmental about people who do things differently from the way we do them. Everyone’s situation is different. If Saks could talk, he would tell everyone who demands that he should stay indoors to f***k off, but then, he’s a bit of a dick.

    Jul 30, 2012 at 10:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #108.1   Raichu

      Love your story! I think you did the right thing with Saks.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 2:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #108.2   catsarepeopletoo

      Really good points.
      I’m sure there will be plenty of dipshits here who will proceed berate you for continuing to let Saks be an outdoor cat after the foot incident.
      But if Saks were so scared or scarred by this, he would have decided himself to become an indoor cat.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 4:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #109   N

    I think this entire issue has been polarized around the wrong issue. Rather than argue about whether pet owners are cruel to re-home their pets when forced to move into “pets not allowed” rental properties, why not ask why landlords are permitted to deny/refuse housing to pet owners (or to levy prohibitive surcharges that make retaining the pets financially untenable)? These widespread practices are inconsistent with the reality that a large proportion of the public have pets, and it seems such prohibitive rental policies would create more shelter overcrowding issues than pet owner callousness would. I imagine most people would opt to take their pets when they moved if it were illegal to reject prospective tenants on the basis of pet ownership.

    The indoor/outdoor cats issue, as others have commented, seems to come down to individual cats and the environments they’re currently in. My cat is a rescue cat, a tortoiseshell ragdoll/persian who must have been a semi-outdoor cat before, or at least an escapee (she was rescued from the wild, covered with burrs). She’s adjusted well to being indoors full-time (we live in a high-rise), but I think that’s because she’s relatively sedate. I’ve known other cats who couldn’t tolerate the switch.

    Jul 30, 2012 at 1:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #109.1   The Elf

      Because it’s their property.

      Jul 30, 2012 at 1:24 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #109.2   Jessi

      Pets can do a hell of a lot of damage to apartments and houses and people renting are more likely to not care about said damage because they’ll be moving on in a year or so. If they didn’t have to pay a pet deposit (which they may get back), they’d be even less inclined to care.

      Personally, I hate breed-restrictions when it comes to rental properties, as I own Pit Bull mixes, but I totally understand why most have them (it’s usually an insurance issue).

      Jul 31, 2012 at 4:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #109.3   catsarepeopletoo

      Its a sticky subject.

      Urine and claws can cause tremendous damage to floors. Also, dogs in particular can cause a lot of problems for landlords (my downstairs neighbor’s dog barked constantly when they first moved in. Luckily he’s since shut up/calmed down but he still tries to attack what he sees as an intruder when any tenant enters the common area).

      You can’t really judge landlords for wanting to avoid noise complaints and attacks.

      As far as pet deposits: yeah it’s a tricky thing to ask someone to pay a $4000 pet deposit. But, realistically, a dog can easily make this amount of damage to floors, doors and windowsills. If i were a LL I wouldn’t ask for money up front but would require some sort of arrangement where the deposit was not cashed unless / until damage occurs.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 4:18 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #109.4   hair

      Plus, allergies.
      I could not move into a flat that has housed a cat – allergic shock, here I come. So I am incredibly thankful for LL who do not allow cats. I expect the same is true for other animal-related allergies.

      Aug 4, 2012 at 10:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #110   Nami

    Yay, I’m the 109th commenter! Do I get a prize? Hello? Anyone?

    Jul 30, 2012 at 1:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #110.1   The Elf

      Yeah, a cat.

      Jul 31, 2012 at 7:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #110.2   Connie

      Congratulations!!! Where do I ship her?

      Jul 31, 2012 at 8:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #111   Raichu

    Can’t believe all the people who are on the side of the douchebag co-worker here. Connie is doing the right thing.

    Jul 30, 2012 at 2:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #112   MKF

    My emotions are definitely with team email writer. But volunteering in a shelter, my complaint would be that the tone of the email doesn’t help anything. Passive aggressive attacks don’t help the cat get a home.

    Jul 31, 2012 at 12:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #113   catsarepeopletoo

    Why do most people here have such a black and white view on this issue?
    About 1/2 of the landlords in my city won’t allow pets, and the landlords that do often gauge the rental prices knowing this. Not everyone has the means to pay $400 extra a month to take their cats with them.
    ALL CATS are different. Not all cats can be acclimated to be indoors all the time. My friend got a cat from a rescue who were strictly pro-indoors but the cat, it turned out, was used to being outside and was miserable indoors, constantly crying and acting out, probably bored out of its skull despite the plethora of toys and attention it got. Not able to spend 8 hours a day with the cat and figuring the cat might benefit from a companion,she got a second cat from the SPCA who was found on the street. The good news is the second cat is perfectly content with being indoors (probably because its outdoor life had been spent hungry on the streets, not happily exploring in its owners yard). The bad news is cat #1 was briefly pleased by its new companion, then proceeded to beat up on it, and still cries at the windows every chance it gets.

    Jul 31, 2012 at 1:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #114   ishism

    My friend has three cats and a very small dog. When she lived in my state, it was no problem to find a place that allowed pets. Eventually, they purchased a home and the point was moot.

    Last year she moved to a new state and a town that is almost anti-pet. Like, most homes/apartments flat-out ban all pets. During storm that knocked out power, she considered posting up at a neighbors for a few until her power came back on. The neighbor asked “do the pets have to come?” Mind you, the pets would have been in crates…in the basement.

    Her current landlord insisted on meeting the animals before considering renting to them. Now, the house is being sold and they’re on the hunt for new accommodations. Again, very few places will accept their brood OR they want the several hundred dollars *a piece* for the animals as a deposit. Buying a house is not an option as they still own their home here.

    So, no. It isn’t always so feasible to just take the animal(s) along.

    Oh yeah and no coyotes where I live….

    Jul 31, 2012 at 4:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #115   amusedkiwi

    where I live, all cats are outdoor/indoor, I’d never heard of a cat only living indoors before… this thread has been delightfully amusing. I had a cat once, then I moved to somewhere it couldn’t go, so my mum took him, he then moved himself in with a neighbour, the neighbour moved away and the cat went too. cat seemed fine with it.

    Jul 31, 2012 at 5:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #116   confused brit

    I will never really understand Americans and cats. I know part of it is that cities are big and more people live in flats but the opinions and practices of keeping cats in America just couldn’t be more different from those here in the UK.
    You don’t really own a cat, if anyone owns anything the cat owns the human. Cats make their own choices, well they do for the majority in the UK and I have had one cat give it’s self a new home when he got in a huff about a new feline arrival in the house. I did miss him, he will be long gone by now and I wish I could have seen him through to the end but as he was often seen around the area looking fit and well I knew he was being well cared for in a happy home, all I could do was be happy for him and respect his choice.
    This woman was only trying to do what she felt, as the person who knew the cat the best, what was in the animals best interests, there was no need for the note writer to be so nasty just because he has a different opinion.

    Jul 31, 2012 at 6:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #116.1   Jessi

      Well, we can’t all live in a country where all of the large predators have been killed off, now can we? Rabies is also non-existent in the Uk, is it not?

      Aug 1, 2012 at 3:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #116.2   confusedgerman

      Amen, confusedbrit! from the confused fellow European. I actually know one person who keeps his cats inside only… the flat is wrecked on a regular basis and everyone considers him to be rather odd ;)

      And we on the European mainland do have rabies, but I don’t see Jessies point? Rabies is a virus infection, same as FeLV, FeHV, FIP, FIV, Panleukopenie and the like… get your animal immunised, no problem.

      And cats are predators themselves, aren’t they?

      Aug 4, 2012 at 11:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #116.3   Jessi

      Confused German, my point is that cats and dogs here don’t get the rabies vaccine until their around 4-6 months of age. Suppose you have an indoor/outdoor (or strictly outdoor) cat younger than that and it comes into contact with a rabid animal.

      “And cats are predators themselves, aren’t they?” Yes! Exactly! But they’re non-native predators (they’re also known as an “invasive species”) and have a tendency to kill off native fauna.

      Aug 6, 2012 at 3:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #116.4   the ignorance on this post is still depressing

      I would like to point out that there is relatively little data concerning the relationship between domesticated cats and a decline in native fauna, and that what there is of it remains highly controversial. It is also far more complicated than “cats eat birds, therefore cats are responsible for their decline in numbers”. One study showed that after an elimination of cats in the area, the bird population actually declined at a higher rate because the cats had previously kept down the rat population, which preyed on the nests. Look up ‘mesopredator release’ effect if you’re interested in further understanding the subject.

      Aug 15, 2012 at 6:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #116.5   anothergerman

      My vet immunises cats against rabies at 12 weeks age.
      And humans are the most invasive species of all.

      Aug 16, 2012 at 3:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #117   m

    I think Connie did the responsible thing. My family has “barn cats” that live outside and in our barn. We take them to the vet and feed them but they’re not indoor cats and get really upset if they’re indoors. If my parents ever moved to an apartment they definitely wouldn’t be able to take them because the cats wouldn’t want to live inside.
    If it was an indoor cat it would be different but the cat is used to being free and outside.

    Jul 31, 2012 at 10:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #118   Stacey

    You know as “awesome” as all you people are yelling at her to simply make the cat miserable by attempting to train it to be an indoor cat, a cat can get depressed with changes like that to the point that it stops eating. An anorexic cat CANNOT start eating even if it wants to, you need to force feed it. And even then it may be too far gone and have liver failure and DIE.

    I tried to take in a cat that turns out was way too far gone along that path to save. Had him barely 24 hours and needed to put him down. When I got a hold of the original owner, she was just fine with me dropping her dying cat off at the no kill shelter (which would have had to put him down as well with the money they could have been fixing feral cats with). THAT is abandoning a cat, so take stock. She just didn’t want the cat anymore so passed it to her son, who passed it to my friend who’s cat started attacking her children for petting the new one, so I took it in. The poor thing was so far gone into liver failure that it was YELLOW! Not something I generally check about cats. That woman wanted no responsibility and couldn’t care less what happened. THAT is abandoning an animal, not trying to rehome it because it will not be happy where she’s moving.

    Yes, I would personally never move anywhere that didn’t take my cats, but what if she’s moving overseas? I moved to Europe for a year and my parents kept my cat in that time because I was fortunate to have them. Not only could I not have taken him to where I was moving because the place wouldn’t allow it, I seriously doubt he would have made it through the 6mo holding period to get him into that country. What if apartment size aside, she’s moving to a city? We live in a city = cats don’t go out. The older one is allowed out on our balcony on her leash and that’s it.

    Circumstances beyond her control (and yes the necessity of taking a new job or moving in order to properly support yourself count as such) are dictating that she needs to give the cat to someone who can give it the life it is accustomed to and enjoys. She’s checking among people she knows and can verify, what is terrible about that? She might be planning on checking in on the cat in a week or 2 to see if it adjusts to the new placement, she might be trying to line up a home in case moving the cat indoors fails? Do any of you know if she plans to see if the cat can cope with the move first? No. She may also be trying to find a new home, but if the cat is unhappy plan to stick it out in the new apt with it inside for better or worse until her circumstances change.

    Indoor vs outdoor is not the point here, the point is she made a responsible request of someone she knows as an animal lover to see if he knew someone with the conditions she knew her cat would be happy in. He decided to then be a bitch about it.

    Aug 1, 2012 at 6:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #119   redheadwglasses

    I just found out from a friend that one of our friends PUT HER TWO CATS TO SLEEP so she could move in with her boyfriend. He’s not allergic or anything; he just didn’t want her to move in with the cats (who are young and healthy).

    She is now dead to me.

    Aug 2, 2012 at 7:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #119.1   The Elf

      Wow, now *that’s* abandonment!

      Aug 2, 2012 at 8:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #119.2   confusedgerman

      Weeeell, considering how finding a new home for them is viewed here… she should have put down the boyfriend instead…

      Aug 4, 2012 at 11:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #119.3   Jessi

      Wow, the vet who did that ought to lose their license. Also, your ex-friend should seek help, as she’s clearly suffering from some mental issues.

      Aug 7, 2012 at 4:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #119.4   TKD

      You need a vet to put down a cat?

      Aug 7, 2012 at 6:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #119.5   LadyIslay

      I have a male cat that pees on everything in the house. Yes, he’s fixed. He also constantly attacks our formal-feral female cat. He’s just very territorial and doesn’t like living with other cats. We haven’t been able to find him an alternate home, and he is absolutely miserable being stuck outside or in the barn 24/7. The SPCA has refused to take him. My choices: live with a house that smells like cat pee forever, abandon the cat to live outside, or have it put down. What would you do?

      Aug 7, 2012 at 11:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #119.6   Jessi

      Re-home the former feral?

      Aug 11, 2012 at 4:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #120   Havetosayit

    Who cares, it’s just a damn cat. Move to a new place and find one that looks just like it wandering the streets. Do people seriously pay for these things anymore?

    Aug 6, 2012 at 5:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #121   Cookers

    I recently picked up a stray living under a porch on my college campus. After taking him in he has never wanted to set foot outdoors again. We have another cat we adopted from the Humane Society and she demands to be taken outside every day. We bring her outside on a halter and allow her to explore for a while then bring her back inside (we tried doing this with the stray but he is too scared of being outside he won’t stop shaking). There are ways to work around things like your cat being used to being outdoors if you truly want to keep your pet. Like others have said before me, I would never give up my pets, I would find housing suitable for my family (including the cats). When I purchased them I made a commitment to take care of them. But, at least she is trying to find a good home, which is better than many people in this situation. I don’t think it’s right to judge her because a) we don’t know her and b) we don’t know her cat.

    Aug 9, 2012 at 1:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #122   Sumsah

    Also, to people saying that pets forget about you, I’d have to say you are seriously misinformed. My cat only sees my Grandma (who I lived with for a summer with my cat) very very rarely, maybe once a year? And she still remembers her every time she visits. My cat normally hides when strangers come into the house, but when my grandma comes in she runs up to her for belly rubs. Similarly, my parents had to give my childhood dog (who was attached to me strongest) to my grandparents for a while because they believed the dogs were giving my little sister severe asthma. I couldn’t get to visit her as often as I liked due to distance, but every time I visited my puppy got so excited and stayed by my side leaning on my leg the entire time I was there.

    Some cats will move on because they didn’t care much for you in the first place, but when you see a stray cat you’ve picked up run to the front door every time you come home so you can hug him (he has a hug position he does when he wants cuddles), its hard to believe that they forget about you in a day or two as some people here suggest.

    Alas, it always depends on the animal and the bond you have with them.

    Aug 9, 2012 at 1:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #123   Backa

    Okay so, some cats can adopt happily from being indoor/outdoor to indoor only. Some can’t. What can people not understand about that? Seriously? If a cat has known only the indoors their entire life, of course they’re going to be fine with that, like a person born blind. I know for a fact that when I had indoor/outdoor cats that they would NEVER be happy if I forced them to be indoor only. When my brother tried, his cat escaped and…well, escaped for good since she was so unhappy. She’s out there somewhere. She knows how to take care of herself.

    Seriously, there is nothing irresponsible about making sure the cat is happy. Indoor/outdoor cats are not babies or children unless they are under 3 years of age. Above that age they are an ADULT cat. Which means that they have personalities, they know how they like to live, and are developed like adults. If you were an adult and had to choose between staying with the someone you liked or staying in a living situation you liked, what would you choose? That depends on you. A cat can make it very obvious if they prefer you or the outdoors. I’m sure this cat made it obvious that it loved the outdoors, therefore she is making the best decision for it.

    Also, for god’s sake, indoor/outdoor cats know how to take care of themselves. They are not helpless. They make mistakes like every other animal but they’re not going to be pathetically lost without the same owner unless their personality is predisposed that way. Most indoor/outdoor cats are not, for obvious reasons. If they were predisposed that way they’d spend the majority of their time in the house, therefore being fine to be moved to ind0or-only status.

    In summation, it’s very obvious that the cat likes being outdoors and the owner is acknowledging that, to the cat’s benefit. I believe it would be cruel to lock a cat like that indoors.

    Aug 10, 2012 at 10:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #123.1   Jessi

      “If a cat has known only the indoors their entire life, of course they’re going to be fine with that, like a person born blind.”

      That’s one of the most messed up statements I’ve ever read.

      As for everything else you’ve written: you think it’s okay to release invasive species into the wild just because they’d be happier there than confined?

      I’ve got a dog who *loves* being outside. I think I’m gonna let her roam free because she doesn’t like being cooped up indoors. She can look after herself and take on most predators who try to take her on. In fact, if she comes across your little house cat, she’ll probably eat it (cats inside our home are friends. Cats outside our home are small animals/game.), but that’s the circle of life, right?

      So why can’t I let my Pit Bull run free like you can your cat?

      Aug 11, 2012 at 4:33 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #123.2   Lil'

      Because your pit bull could kill a child, or an adult for that matter. I know, I know. Not YOUR dogs. Your dogs are just big puppies, and you keep them inside simply because you are a responsible, loving pet owner. (eyes rolling) Weak comparison. You can argue the dangers of a cat bite, scratch, etc. but the dog’s attack alone could kill – even YOUR dog’s.

      Aug 11, 2012 at 7:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #123.3   Jessi

      @Lil’ cats are decimating ecosystems, but the off chance that a random dog might kill someone (really a minutely small chance) is the reason dog owners should keep their dogs inside.

      Okie dokie. That sounds totally logical.

      Lets change the breed. Pretend I don’t own a Pit Bull. Pretend I own a 3 pound Chihuahua. Why can’t I let my Chihuahua roam free?

      Aug 12, 2012 at 1:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #123.4   Lil'

      We weren’t discussing random dogs. We were discussing your pit bull that you inserted into an argument about roaming cats, as if there is any comparison. Pit bulls are a restricted breed for a reason, and rightfully so. Changing the breed made it less of a threat, but it doesn’t level the field when you compare roaming cats who are more likely to avoid contact and dogs who are more likely to approach whether it’s out of curiosity or aggression. If out of curiosity, then they’ll have a harder time getting away if they find themselves in trouble than a cat who can jump a fence or climb a tree. If out of aggression, they have the potential to do a lot more damage than a cat. Keep it apples to apples. Cats roam my neighborhood all day, I open my door to find my neighbors cats laying on my lawn, and they run when they think I might approach. However, I was approached by a pit bull as I was on a walk. He saw me, was curious, charged me and jumped on me. His claws dug into my back and my hand was in his mouth before his owner was able to pull him off me. Thankfully he chose me as the target of his curiosity and not my three year old who was riding his tricycle along side me. Even his playfulness could have seriously injured my child. What was the owner shouting as she pulled him away? “Oh, he’s just playing with you! He won’t hurt you!” So I’ll take an outdoor cat strolling through my neighborhood any day over a dog, especially a restricted breed.

      Aug 12, 2012 at 2:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #123.5   Jessi

      “Pit bulls are a restricted breed for a reason, and rightfully so. ”

      Really? Care to “educate me” on that one? How are they “rightfully restricted”? Oh, wait, nevermind, I can list your reasons for you and all are more than likely born of ignorance and mis-information.

      So, in the end, you’re okay with an animal killing ecosystems, but not okay with one which may jump up on you. Check.

      Again, totally logical.

      I’m officially done with this conversation.

      Aug 12, 2012 at 11:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #123.6   Who passed out the Haterade?

      @Lil’ “He saw me, was curious, charged me and jumped on me. His claws dug into my back and my hand was in his mouth before his owner was able to pull him off me. Thankfully he chose me as the target of his curiosity and not my three year old who was riding his tricycle along side me. Even his playfulness could have seriously injured my child.”

      No kidding. Especially if your child had screamed and tried to run, quite possibly causing the pit bull to snap from “playful” to “prey mode”. Like you, I’m very glad things weren’t worse.

      “What was the owner shouting as she pulled him away? “Oh, he’s just playing with you! He won’t hurt you!””

      Sometimes it seems like every single one of them knows their wittle-bitty-puppy-who’s-just-a-big-pile-of-mush-oh-yes-he-is would never harm a fly. Right up until they snap into “prey mode” one day around a little child, and sometimes even after.

      @Jessi “Oh, wait, nevermind, I can list your reasons for you and all are more than likely born of ignorance and mis-information…

      I’m officially done with this conversation.”

      Thank you for posting one of the most amusing comments I’ve seen in a while, albeit unintentionally. XD

      Aug 13, 2012 at 5:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #124   whiteroses

    Wow, these comments are illuminating.

    I get loving your pets and looking at them like a member of the family. And no living creature- child, cat, dog, rat, snake- deserves to be abused or abandoned, ever. But as other commenters have said, pets do not equal human children.

    When our one month old son was born, my husband converted our indoor/outdoor cat into an outdoor cat. It’s where the cat is happiest, and we didn’t want him bringing in anything from the outside to harm our son (fleas, etc). He doesn’t always like being outside- but he gets along well, he eats regularly, and he occasionally sleeps in our (indoor) laundry room on cold nights if it’s needed.

    If I have to choose between any human being and an animal, I choose a human being. And if I had to choose between any other human being on earth and my son, I choose my son. It’s a no brainer as far as I’m concerned. My husband is the same way. So choosing between our son and our cat is a very simple choice for us.

    To everyone saying that a cat is just like a human child- no. I don’t change my cat’s diapers, feed it with a bottle or am prepared to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars if needed to turn it into a productive member of society. Yes, I will protect and look after it. But not to the same extent that I would look after my son. I wouldn’t go through eight hours of pain to bring my cat into the world- pain that was so intense I wanted to die. I don’t feel the same rush of love when I look at my cat as I do when I look at my son. And yes, animals may love you unconditionally— but so do children if you parent them correctly. And, as PPs have said, if you view your pet and your child the same way, then you’re parenting all wrong.

    My child comes before everyone else- even taking precendence, in some cases, over my husband. So I understand Connie’s motivations completely.

    Aug 14, 2012 at 11:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #125   Stephanie

    Indoor cats live much, much longer and healthier lives than outdoor cats. The average age for an indoor cat is 14, for an outdoor cat it is only 7. Outdoor cats get hit by cars, get subjected to many diseases and quite possibly horrible abuse by humans.

    My indoor cats don’t want to go outside. My last cat lived to be a grand old 17 years old and was sweet and loving her whole life.

    Our gardens, which we work very hard on, are constantly dug up by neighboorhood cats who use them as litter boxes. We see dead cats on the side of the road (busy route) all the time. We see new roaming cats also all the time, probably (though I have no proof) because they are replacements for the other outdoor cats who have died. Cats also kill birds and other small wildlife because they have hunting instincts, which can be satisfied inside with toys and humans that will play with them, developing a bond and giving them exercise.

    Caring, responsible pet parents keep their cats indoors, for their health and happiness, not to mention their neighbor’s happiness. A domestic cat does not “need” or “want” to be outside. A tiger, yes, but not a kitty cat.

    Aug 16, 2012 at 11:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up


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