“Our organization recently moved most of its employees from several small offices into one large office,” writes our submitter in Vancouver. “It only took five months for the kitchen conflict to ramp up into a full-blown note war.”
related: Let the rest of us eat cake.
91 responses so far ↓
#1
Rain
I don’t understand why this person is mad that their coworkers ate the cake meant for sharing with their coworkers. How else does sharing work?
Jun 18, 2013 at 9:32 pm rating: 90
#2
Nicki
Y’know, I’d actually be pissed too. But I’d send a memo to the boss, find out who it was and break some necks in the parking lot.
No one fucks with MY birthday cake. >:(
Jun 18, 2013 at 9:32 pm rating: 90
#3
JK
If ever there was a time to order a ginormous cake shaped like a giraffe, it would be now.
Jun 18, 2013 at 9:49 pm rating: 90
#4
dcg
If anything, the larger of the three notes illustrates perfectly what douchebags the people of Vancouver really are – i.e., the kind who will eat all your cake and leave you an anonymous “fuck you” note.
Jun 18, 2013 at 9:55 pm rating: 90
#5
Brian H
I’m telling you one day we are going to read about how someone dosed some of their food with a potent poison to punish the thieves in their office.
Jun 18, 2013 at 11:36 pm rating: 90
#6
Nola
Who could possibly cut the first slice out of the birthday cake? It is normal to get angry over this.
Jun 19, 2013 at 2:28 am rating: 90
#7
Trish Smith
Nothing shows just how mature you are than throwing a fit over birthday cake. And to think I thought it was just 5-year olds who did that sort of thing…
Jun 19, 2013 at 3:49 am rating: 90
#8
greg house md
The immature thing is taking something that doesn’t belong to you.
Jun 19, 2013 at 5:05 am rating: 90
#9
Sam
If it was an already half-eaten cake, I could understand… (though it’s still rude) but who takes an uncut cake out of the office fridge and helps themselves to it? Raised by wolves!
Jun 19, 2013 at 5:47 am rating: 90
#10
The Elf
Again, I must advocate opting out of the No Man’s Land of the Office (the communal fridge). Insulated bags, kept at the desk, rock. You can get little containers for things like coffee creamer or dressing, too. There’s nothing that goes in the fridge that can’t be brought in via insulated bag.
Jun 19, 2013 at 7:40 am rating: 90
#11
H for Toy
I’m surprised there was no “we didn’t want you to gain weight by eating the whole cake, so we stole half” response.
Jun 19, 2013 at 7:53 am rating: 90
#12
e
Yeah, it’s obviously “karma” and not basic biology if you catch a cold from germy food. I hate those people who think there’s a special karma fairy who goes around settling their personal scores.
Jun 19, 2013 at 8:54 am rating: 90
#13
Tard
Folks stopped fridge surfing after the ‘Ex-Lax brownies and Cream Cheese & Pencil Shavings’ episode. Oh yeah, washing it down with the Murine Lemonaid (which gives the drinker diarrhea) really clinched it.
Jun 19, 2013 at 9:18 am rating: 90
#14
Tom
I just can’t fathom the lower white note in this scenario. Are they trolling? Do they think that shit is actually funny? “Ha ha I stole your cake, here’s some funny pointers on how to make food more delicious for thieves! I’m a riot!” Are they pretending to be the thief? I just don’t get it. Either way, it’s not professional in the slightest.
Seriously, if I was the boss and I found out who wrote that bottom note I would sit them down and ask them what they think is so damned funny. Then I would think long and hard about that pink slip.
Jun 19, 2013 at 10:10 am rating: 90
#15
Luckyhermit
I think the snarky response note was funny, and was most likely not by the cake thief.
If somebody leaves a whiny note, then it’s only fair to leave one making fun of them.
Jun 19, 2013 at 11:37 am rating: 90
#16
Will
I think I’m on team “sack everybody and start over.” That office is too dysfunctional to succeed.
Jun 19, 2013 at 12:30 pm rating: 90
#17
Bubba
They need one of these: http://amzn.to/18adVqx
If it wasn’t for people who didn’t secure their food there wouldn’t be any thievery in this kitchen, would there?
Jun 19, 2013 at 12:35 pm rating: 90
#18
Rachel
But… I *LOVE* giraffes!!
Jun 19, 2013 at 3:12 pm rating: 90
#19
warns
Guess what, here’s a grown up rule. Never ever ever take food that hasn’t been offered to you. Here’s another one, people who steal things aren’t grown ups, and leaving them a note is going to make them act immature, even more.
Jun 19, 2013 at 3:53 pm rating: 90
#20
justme
The note writer probably isn’t the thief and probably doesn’t actually hate giraffes. He/she was just trying to be funny, and (since I laughed out loud at the note) succeeded to at least some extent.
While I’m sure the birthday celebrant did not enjoy the humor at all, I see no reason why those of us who did not have our cake stolen can’t appreciate it.
*No, I have never stolen anything from a communal fridge. Humorous responses to useless PA notes just make me laugh.
Jun 19, 2013 at 4:19 pm rating: 90
#21
Pkay
Now here comes into play my newest invention of the combination lock containers to be sold to offices worldwide. Beware of the employee that comes to work with bolt cutters.
Jun 20, 2013 at 4:42 am rating: 90
#22
DS
A wacky joke describing an animal using a superlative? Classic! I wonder what kind of hilarious, free-spirited manic pixie dream girl came up with that gem.
Jun 20, 2013 at 12:50 pm rating: 90
#23
KH
Is it weird that I am the most offended by the giraffe comment. lol. They are NOT creepy.
Jun 21, 2013 at 4:00 am rating: 90
#24
Paula K
We had a thief in the building. He stole my sammiches. I made a cat food sammich. Some of the fancy sort, mixed in with mayo & relish, garnished with a lettuce leaf, on a fancy bun. F*cker never took it.
Jun 21, 2013 at 8:46 am rating: 90
#25
RCat
Way to go, cake thief. Now the cake is a lie.
Jun 21, 2013 at 10:00 am rating: 90
#26
motorama
I say kudos to the cake thief, grab the world by the cajones, it’s better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission, and if you’re creative enough to leave a hilarious note then all the power to you, it would have been another forgettable, boring birthday cake handout session without the theft, the thief made it memorable. Way better.
Jun 21, 2013 at 11:51 am rating: 90
#27
Phoenix
My roommates did this to me with my birthday cake. They had a mutual friend over on a saturday (not a friend of mine) and my party was on Sunday, so I had already gotten the cake. They helped themselves to the cake, on the justification of “but (our friend) won’t be here tomorrow to have any!”
No, and he wasn’t invited to the party either. And I’ve never met him. And you ate over half the cake!
Jun 23, 2013 at 5:03 pm rating: 90
Comments are Closed