A warning from the diet police

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September 8th, 2014 · 95 comments

Abby spotted this dubious bit of dietary advice at her local supermarket in Catonsville, Maryland.

Adds Abby: “Maybe whoever wrote this should spend all the free time they have (obviously a lot) researching the nutritional value of eggs (protein) vs. fruit (carbs).”

related: The anti-milk militia

FILED UNDER: food · Maryland · unsolicited feedback

95 responses so far ↓

#1 Susan

Whatta yolk!

Sep 8, 2014 at 10:31 pm rating: 90

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- #1.1 TKD
  
  Egg-cellent!
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 7:29 am rating: 90
- #1.2 The Elf
  
  Their diet police career is about to be eggstinct.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 7:56 am rating: 90
- #1.3 TKD
  
  Move ovum bacon, here comes the fruit salad, yummy yummy!
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 8:51 am rating: 90
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#2 mcap247

I smell a vegan.

Sep 9, 2014 at 12:06 am rating: 90

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- #2.1 The Elf
  
  It has the look of an activist campaign, and that likely means vegan or vegetarian.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 7:07 am rating: 90
- #2.2 sharon
  
  come now, we all know only the vegans are militantly idiotic.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 12:12 pm rating: 90
- #2.3 The Elf
  
  About the cholesterol in eggs, pretty much.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 2:33 pm rating: 90
- #2.4 Zehirah
  
  How do you somebody is vegan?
  
  Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 3:05 am rating: 90
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#3 assiveProgressive

Oh, don’t get your Fruits of the Loom in a knot!

Sep 9, 2014 at 1:21 am rating: 90

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- #3.1 assiveProgressive
  
  I am having an egg sandwich for lunch. Mmmmmm.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 1:10 pm rating: 90
- #3.2 Lil'
  
  Enjoy your last meal. DEAD MAN WALKIN’!
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 2:33 pm rating: 90
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#4 Hayley

I’m going to make a sweet fruit omelette now.

Sep 9, 2014 at 2:20 am rating: 90

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#5 Nathan Rudy

And not all cholesterol is bad for you — in fact much of the cholesterol in an egg is necessary for healthy life.

This is why uninformed people should not give health advice.

Sep 9, 2014 at 6:15 am rating: 90

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- #5.1 The Elf
  
  Yeah, they clearly missed the research earlier this year (last year?) that totally exonerated the egg. Now it is considered a “superfood”.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 7:09 am rating: 90
- #5.2 TKD
  
  Whether you choose to believe in millions of years of evolution or a supreme human architect, there is a reason certain food items taste good and others not so. If it tastes good, it is probably something our bodies need to function properly. They key is to get the different chemicals in the right ratios and total quantity for your lifestyle.
  
  Unless you are a Vegan, then you are superior to all known or imagined forms of existence. Go forth Vegan and spread the word, but not the butter!
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 7:42 am rating: 90
- #5.3 Lil'
  
  Hey, Elf…I think you mean “eggs-onerated”.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 9:36 am rating: 90
- #5.4 The Elf
  
  *headdesk* What an eggregious mistake! If I could take a moment to eggsplain…. I typed it before the coffee kicked in, and I wasn’t eggxactly myself. You suggestion was most eggcellent.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 12:06 pm rating: 90
- #5.5 Lil'
  
  You always crack me up, Elf.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 2:30 pm rating: 90
- #5.6 The Elf
  
  More like, I’m just plain cracked.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 6:55 am rating: 90
- #5.7 ChrisBaker
  
  And eggs are used in many other items, not just solely eaten alone. Eggs are used in some breads, noodles, etc. Angel food cake uses eggs, but just the whites. The yolks are what contain 99% of the cholesterol.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 2:56 pm rating: 90
- #5.8 Raichu
  
  TKD, this is true, but it’s also a mistake to think that means we should just eat whatever tastes good. Evolutionary context is important.
  
  We crave sugar and starch because before the onset of agriculture, it was much more difficult to obtain those things and we need them to give our bodies immediately accessible energy. Excess was stored as fat, which could be used to get an individual through a very lean time. Now that those in the first world have pretty much unlimited access to carb-saturated food, it’s backfiring, so to speak. Our bodies were not evolved or designed (I believe in both, personally) to carry dozens of pounds of excess weight indefinitely.
  
  …that said, I agree that eggs are generally good for you (in moderation) and obviously MUCH better for you than a Big Mac.
  
  Sep 22, 2014 at 5:15 pm rating: 90
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#6 Tesselara

Ooo! Let’s eat Big Macs! They only have 27g of fat and a not-at-all disgusting 530 cals! But, this made me curious, so I explored: http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-living/nutrition-and-healthy-eating/expert-blog/eggs-and-heart-disease/bgp-20056252

Sep 9, 2014 at 6:50 am rating: 90

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- #6.1 kmd
  
  530 calories is not so horrible in my view – not nearly as worrying as the GMO used in the ingredients…and the preservatives…and the sodium… why are calories disgusting? Are we worrying about cardiovascular health or do we have a fat bias?
  
  Sep 12, 2014 at 6:10 pm rating: 90
- #6.2 Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff
  
  Please elaborate as to why GMOs are worrying.
  
  Oct 11, 2014 at 9:57 am rating: 90
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#7 The Elf

Mmmmhmmm! Love to have protein in the morning! That’s why I eat fruit salad!

Sep 9, 2014 at 7:10 am rating: 90

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#8 TKD

Throw back Tuesday:

Those carbs were fucking delicious!

Sep 9, 2014 at 8:53 am rating: 90

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#9 Lita

Oh, come on. You shell not judge others’ eating choices.

Sep 9, 2014 at 10:02 am rating: 90

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- #9.1 Tesselara
  
  No! Let’s egg them on!
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 10:20 am rating: 90
- #9.2 Tara Highman
  
  Eggsactly!
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 10:28 am rating: 90
- #9.3 Lita
  
  Well, now you’ve got me eggcited!
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 3:17 pm rating: 90
- #9.4 Raichu
  
  People should eat whitever they want.
  
  Sep 22, 2014 at 5:16 pm rating: 90
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#10 Poltergeist

You’re absolutely right. These eggs should not be going down my gullet! They would be put to much better use if they were splattered across your windshield.

Sep 9, 2014 at 10:22 am rating: 90

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#11 Ahava

Why am I picturing a chicken in the egg section of the supermarket, wearing stilts, an overcoat, a hat and sunglasses and taping these notes to the egg cartons?

I hate when people tell me what I should/shouldn’t eat. Bugger off, food police.

Sep 9, 2014 at 10:25 am rating: 90

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- #11.1 Poltergeist
  
  Now every time I go to the supermarket, I’m going to be on the lookout for farm animals incognito.
  
  And if they’re ever out of ground beef, I’ll blame it on the big cow behind the counter.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 11:27 am rating: 90
- #11.2 assiveProgressive
  
  Left-wing conspiracy: chickens with missives tucked under their left wings.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 1:14 pm rating: 90
- #11.3 kermit
  
  Nah, it’s guerrilla marketing from McDonalds.
  
  If they stuck a note to the burger claiming that it contained less cholesterol than one single boiled egg, they would undoubtedly increase their sales too.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 2:00 pm rating: 90
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#12 blueknight1st

Apparently the note writer doesn’t understand that not all cholesterol is bad. However what is bad is sticking your nose in other peoples business.

Sep 9, 2014 at 11:36 am rating: 90

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#13 Yudith

The scariest part about it is that it’s true. Big Mac cholesterol content: 75 mg. One large egg cholesterol content: 195 mg. It makes you thing again before eating this two-eggs-bacon-sausage breakfast.

Sep 9, 2014 at 11:54 am rating: 90

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- #13.1 phoenix
  
  I just thought it gave me a reason to go ahead and add a Big Mac to my breakfast routine. I …might have misread something.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 12:24 pm rating: 90
- #13.2 kermit
  
  Yudith, that would make sense if cholesterol is the only thing that people needed to consume as food.
  
  The nutritional value of a Big Mac is practically non-existent, and worst of all does not even satiate your hunger.
  
  Eggs have a huge nutritional value by comparison. They satiate hunger, contain essentially fatty acids, vitamins A, all Bs, C and E, that are vital for good health.
  
  From a quick Google search,the fact in the note is from a Daily Mail (tabloid) “article”. Sorry, but it’s just as ridiculous as telling people that bananas contain pesticides and “cheese” doodles don’t, so therefore “cheese” doodles are “better” for you.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 1:56 pm rating: 90
- #13.3 TheBeastAmongUs
  
  Big Macs have 75mg of LDL cholesterol, which just clogs up your arteries. Egg yolks have 185mg of HDL cholesterol, which cleans the LDL cholesterol out of your arteries. I’d rather have 185mg of good stuff than 75mg of bad stuff. I’d also like to mention the incredible amount of preservatives that are put into Big Macs that do all sorts of wonderful things to the human body, none of which are found in eggs.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 1:58 pm rating: 90
- #13.4 DaveS
  
  So the lesson is to eat an egg with your Big Mac to cancel it out!
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 3:34 pm rating: 90
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#14 Jami

All letters like this tempt me to do is buy every single egg in the store then throw an egg eating party outside a vegan restaurant. Making sure to blow up the original note as decoration so they know that their attempts to police my eating habits badly backfired.

And I’m not even all that fond of eggs.

Sep 9, 2014 at 1:27 pm rating: 90

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- #14.1 TheBeastAmongUs
  
  I love how vegans go on about eggs and the evils of killing animals. They don’t realize that chickens must lay eggs almost every day, whether or not the eggs are fertilized. What happens when the eggs are not eaten? They don’t simply disappear. Instead, they rot.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 2:02 pm rating: 90
- #14.2 magicdomino
  
  In all fairness to the ethical vegans (as opposed to vegans who simply prefer vegetables), if people didn’t want the eggs, there wouldn’t be many chickens laying eggs . In fact,the only chickens would be a few pets.
  
  Having said that, there are some eggs in my refrigerator that are due for a date with a pot of boiling water.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 4:09 pm rating: 90
- #14.3 Jami
  
  I just hate it when people get all Holier Than Thou about anything. Food, religion (believing in it or not), music – makes me want to punch them in the face. Even if it’s something that I otherwise agree with. I mean, I love Doctor Who, but if I was around someone who tried to say Doctor Who was better than all other Sci-Fi and started putting down people for liking Star Wars or what have you, I’d shove their toy sonic screwdriver places toy sonic screwdrivers aren’t meant to go.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 4:39 pm rating: 90
- #14.4 The Beast Among Us
  
  Pet chickens still have to lay eggs. Just like pet cows will still produce too much milk.
  
  Sep 9, 2014 at 6:58 pm rating: 90
- #14.5 hbc
  
  I eat eggs, but there’s a huge ethical difference between factory farms and chickens wandering around laying eggs as they wish. The reason those eggs are so cheap isn’t because people are following chickens around the farm and picking up the results of nature–they’re jamming them into enclosures where they can’t turn around and removing their beaks because they hurt themselves from stress and boredom.
  
  Like I said, I eat those eggs, and would never offer this lecture up to someone simply for eating a frittata. But implying that the egg industry is neutral or even beneficial to chickens is more misleading than the note on the carton.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 6:51 am rating: 90
- #14.6 The Elf
  
  Totally, Jami. There’s only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people’s cultures, and the Dutch.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 6:59 am rating: 90
- #14.7 Snicklefritz
  
  Hey – what’d I do to you? I’m Dutch.
  Well, I’m really descended from many dutch ancestors that rode the boat over in the early 1900′s and settled on farms in Massachusetts. But seriously….. did I kick your dog one day?
  Do you have issues with the oh so delicious cheeses that the Dutch produce, or their liberal attitudes regarding recreational drug use and prostitution. They also have some of the most wonderful cookies shaped like whimsical windmills.
  Damn. Now I want a cookie.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 9:32 am rating: 90
- #14.8 L
  
  You know what’s hilarious? Where I live, there’s a lady who sells fresh farm eggs for cheaper than the stores sell their eggs.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 10:49 am rating: 90
- #14.9 pooham
  
  When my sister watched her friend’s house and animals while the friend was traveling, she had to make sure to collect the ~18 eggs those chickens laid every day!
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 12:42 pm rating: 90
- #14.10 The Elf
  
  Just quoting, Snicklefritz. Nothing personal.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 12:57 pm rating: 90
- #14.11 Jami
  
  Maybe Elf got a splinter from some poorly made wooden shoes, Snickle.
  
  I want some Dutch Mints now though. I haven’t had any in years. They’re mint cream balls dipped first in chocolate then a thin candy shell in either pink, white, or mint green. (Don’t know if they were really from Holland or not but that was their brand name.)
  
  And some Mills Kaviar – which is Norwegian, not Dutch, but we used to buy in from the same store we bought the Dutch Mints.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 12:57 pm rating: 90
- #14.12 Snicklefritz
  
  That’s why you have to wear a good sturdy pair of socks with your wooden shoes.
  The mints – yes, the incredible, incredible mints – they are to die for.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 3:32 pm rating: 90
- #14.13 DaveS
  
  magicdomino,
  
  That means the vegans and vegetarians are actually supporting a livestock genocide!
  
  My favorite cartoon on the subject:
  
  http://www.smbc-comics.com/?id=3105
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 3:50 pm rating: 90
- #14.14 Raichu
  
  Jami, I’m not sure what your point would be, since we have no confirmation as a vegan.
  
  hbc, excellent point. Additionally, if the demand for eggs was lower, there wouldn’t be as many chickens in the first place.
  
  Sep 22, 2014 at 5:45 pm rating: 90
- #14.15 ClearlyDemented
  
  As a vegan, I do love to see the reasons people create to justify abusing animals.
  
  Dec 8, 2014 at 12:40 pm rating: 90
- #14.16 Haterade
  
  As someone who’s caught between the two extremes, I do love to see the reasons zealots of both sides create to justify abusing each other.
  
  Dec 9, 2014 at 9:58 am rating: 90
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#15 warns

If you’d like to make suggestions on what people eat, go to school and become a nutritionalist. Aren’t a nutritionalist? Keep your food opinions to yourself.

Sep 9, 2014 at 3:33 pm rating: 90

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- #15.1 L
  
  And ONLY if they ask for your opinion.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 10:50 am rating: 90
- #15.2 Hayley
  
  Better yet, become a dietitian. Though the terms are often used interchangeably, any old quack can take the label of nutritionist and there’s an important distinction between which of the two are actually scientifically accredited.
  
  Sep 20, 2014 at 11:33 am rating: 90
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#16 RedDelicious

JUST LET ME EAT WHAT I FUCKING WANT TO!
I hate to be that person, but you really only do live once, and I don’t intend on leaving this world starving and unhappy. I’m gonna eat every good god damn thing that I feel like. And that doesn’t mean I’m going to be fat and sick and dying of heart disease and diabetes either, because along with a sense of taste, I was also born with a brain. Christ on a cracker give this shit a rest!
/endrant

Sep 9, 2014 at 7:10 pm rating: 90

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- #16.1 The Elf
  
  But would Christ on a cracker be high in cholesterol?
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 7:00 am rating: 90
- #16.2 assiveProgressive
  
  Only if you add a big slab of American cheese.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 9:48 am rating: 90
- #16.3 L
  
  You can also be fat and healthy. Or you can be thin and dying of heart disease and diabetes (my grandmother was 98 pounds when she died of a massive coronary), and that still doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s almost diseases aren’t something you should be ashamed of!
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 10:52 am rating: 90
- #16.4 FeatherBlade
  
  I wouldn’t go that far… there are some diseases that one should definitely be ashamed of having, if only for the deterrent effect your shame would have on the spread of those diseases.
  
  …But that’s another post entirely.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 5:24 pm rating: 90
- #16.5 Jami
  
  If you have a preventable disease it isn’t you who should be ashamed, it’s your loser parents who believed Jenny McMoron when she lied about vaccines causing Autism.
  
  Sep 11, 2014 at 3:11 pm rating: 90
- #16.6 labdude
  
  @RedDelicious, To quote Hunter S. Thompson, “Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!”
  @Jami,
  As father to a child “on the spectrum”, I thank you on spreading the word – even if it is only on this forum. I’ve pretty much given up the fight. Every time you think that insidious lie is dead, it gets brought back up and spread around the ‘net. Again and again and again.
  
  Sep 11, 2014 at 3:39 pm rating: 90
- #16.7 Jami
  
  I wish now I would’ve screen shot my own post to The View’s FB page when I demanded Jenny get fired because she was so unprofessional. (Always interrupting people, acting like a know it all – basically a blonde Joy Bay-what’sherface.) I included the part about how vaccines don’t cause Autism. Someone came back with “If I don’t vaccinate my child how does it hurt others.” I may have suggested that because there’s people who can’t be vaccinated, elderly people, and people with cancer and/or AIDS who could get measles from her unvaccinated kid and die she’d be guilty of murder and the kid would be the murder weapon.
  
  I can’t remember if I mentioned the part where I firmly believe anyone who has a loved one who dies of the measles should sue Jenny for wrongful death since if it wasn’t for her big mouth kids would be getting vaccinated.
  
  Sep 12, 2014 at 3:59 pm rating: 90
- #16.8 L
  
  @FeatherBlade: Shame leads to stigma leads to people not talking about it at all. No shame.
  
  Abstinence only education doesn’t work, and this is much the same.
  
  Sep 12, 2014 at 4:46 pm rating: 90
- #16.9 RedDelicious
  
  I just wish I was allowed to make my own decisions and not have society dictate everything I do… OH WAIT I CAN. -_-
  
  Sep 13, 2014 at 2:21 pm rating: 90
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#17 Rebecca

The human body needs protein AND carbs (and fat). Abby should spend a little more time researching the opinions of actual Nutritional Experts.

Sep 10, 2014 at 1:34 am rating: 90

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- #17.1 mutzali
  
  Abby’s not the one who wrote the note. She discovered it and sent it in.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 1:51 pm rating: 90
- #17.2 Reve C
  
  Yeah, but Abby couldn’t help adding her own protein versus carbs comment.
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 3:46 pm rating: 90
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#18 Lita

Drat, I’ve been trying for two days now to come up with an “omelette you finish” joke…and I can’t do it.

Anyone else want to take a crack (hee hee) at it?

Sep 10, 2014 at 5:17 pm rating: 90

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- #18.1 TKD
  
  Omelette you finish that yolk, just as soon as I’ve laid these cartons ovum there.
  
  Sep 12, 2014 at 10:35 am rating: 90
- #18.2 Lita
  
  Perfect. You really all are you’re cracked up to be.
  
  Sep 12, 2014 at 12:26 pm rating: 90
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#19 JoDa

Ah, I love the food police, but I love the grossed out by food people more. Today in the grocery store, after buying mussels. Woman: “you should tie that bag up so they don’t leak.” Me: “they won’t leak, and that would be a bad idea since they’ll suffocate and then be inedible.” Woman: “wait…those are still alive? That’s cruel! You’re disgusting.” Me: “Everything you eat was alive before it wasn’t…even plants. Besides, no one asked you to eat them…”

Sep 10, 2014 at 6:53 pm rating: 90

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- #19.1 The Beast Among Us
  
  I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.
  
  - A. Whitney Brown
  
  Sep 10, 2014 at 8:31 pm rating: 90
- #19.2 kermit
  
  Fair, enough but how do you tell if a lobster is suicidal or not? I’ve never had the heart to boil one to death because of it.
  
  Sep 11, 2014 at 4:03 am rating: 90
- #19.3 Snicklefritz
  
  They’re all suicidal, otherwise they wouldn’t have wandered into that crate
  
  Sep 11, 2014 at 8:41 am rating: 90
- #19.4 JoDa
  
  How do you tell if a chicken is suicidal or not? Or a cow? Just because someone else fires a bolt gun into their head or electrocutes them doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. If you’re a vegetarian because you can’t stand the thought of that happening, fine, your prerogative, but this woman was also buying fish, just filets. That fish was most likely gutted alive before being nicely presented to her.
  
  Sep 11, 2014 at 8:52 pm rating: 90
- #19.5 L
  
  Oh my god, my worst pet peeve? People who say they’re vegetarian, but they eat fish. 1. There’s a word for that, pescatarian. 2. FISH AREN’T PLANTS.
  
  Sep 12, 2014 at 4:48 pm rating: 90
- #19.6 mutzali
  
  My Dad’s cardiologist (who was vegetarian for religious reasons) told Dad “no meat”. I asked about feeding him chicken and the doc said “No animal products. only occasional fish.”
  
  I asked the doc if he know fish weren’t just wiggly vegetables. He didn’t find it funny. Dad thought it was hilarious.
  
  Sep 15, 2014 at 2:20 pm rating: 90
- #19.7 Raichu
  
  I’ve been a pescetarian for years and yeah. I agree. It’s not the same as being a vegetarian. (Not that I don’t sometimes use that word in social situations to avoid eating beef or something, because it sounds pretentious as all get-out…)
  
  Sep 22, 2014 at 5:49 pm rating: 90
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#20 pinoy

I think it is common knowledge by now that eggs are not that bad at all. We can consume 1 egg a day I think.

Sep 11, 2014 at 8:33 pm rating: 90

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#21 squib

I followed this note’s advice and tried the fruit salad, but my bread came out really weird. Maybe I’m doing it wrong.

Sep 15, 2014 at 8:39 am rating: 90

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#22 Nellie

The 60s called, it wants its dietary advice back.

Sep 15, 2014 at 1:24 pm rating: 90

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#23 Kanoodle

Haha, mis-information. Gotta love when idiots think they know what the fudge they are talking about!

Sep 23, 2014 at 2:14 pm rating: 90

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- #23.1 Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff
  
  I’m not saying it was vegans.
  
  But it was definitely vegans.
  
  Oct 11, 2014 at 9:54 am rating: 90
- #23.2 labdude
  
  As an amateur astronomer, every once in a while, when someone calls him|herself a vegan and makes some outrageous claim, I can’t help but crack a smile and think of them as aliens from some planet orbiting the star Vega – and then it all makes sense.
  
  Dec 9, 2014 at 2:01 pm rating: 90
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#24 Pepper Culpepper

Perhaps this jerk didn’t get the memo that dietary cholesterol is not unhealthy. http://authoritynutrition.com/top-9-biggest-lies-about-dietary-fat-and-cholesterol/

Sep 25, 2014 at 11:33 am rating: 90

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#25 Dr.Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

Note-writer is obviously unaware that as dietary consumption of cholesterol goes up, the body’s production of it goes down. Also; fuck you, Note-writer.

Oct 11, 2014 at 9:53 am rating: 90

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