Our submitter in Boston says she found this note on the kitchen counter “after my evil roommate abused some Adderall and stayed up cleaning, organizing, and generally banging around till an obscene hour.”

Adds our submitter: “I can’t wait until the day when I live alone.”

related: The patron(izing) saint of roommates

Rachel in California says the breakroom at her office hasn’t caused many problems in the past, but a recent wave of new hires has changed that. “The last time I opened the microwave it was stuffed with paper towels, the walls were slathered in orange goop, and it smelled like rotting horse flesh.” (In other words, like a frozen lasagna from Tesco?)

related: Someday, when society has all but crumbled around you…

Precious in Texas says that whenever her mother comes over to visit, “all she wants to do is clean my messy house.” One day, Precious says, her daughter, Allison — along with Allison’s 5-year-old cousin — decided to take matters into their own hands, writing this warning and handing it to their grandma “fast mail.” As for Grandma’s response, says Precious, “I had to read it to her because she was laughing so hard.”

related: Never put nature aside for television

Danny works for a small print company in London. “Our lovely cleaner only comes in once a week, so it falls upon the rest of us to keep the office neat and tidy.” Danny says that, judging from this creation — made up hundreds of punched paper holes — “I’ve got a feeling that someone feels that they are doing more than their fair share.”

related: Could somebody less important than me take care of this?

Kyle in Sydney, Australia says this sign was posted near the elevator in the basement of his building, where apparently someone had spilled some cooking oil on the floor. Based on this note, I’m still a little unsure about how the person who cleaned up the mess felt about the whole situation.

related: Seven words you CAN say on a box of leftover takeout

Eddy shares a house in Providence, Rhode Island with his sister. “We’re both busy with school and work,” Eddy says, “so we take turns cleaning the bathroom.” Well, sort of. “I usually put it off for weeks,” Eddy admits.

Adds Eddy: “By the way, the heart translates loosely to ‘I’ll f’ing kill you.’”

related: The patron(izing) saint of roommates

“When my downstairs neighbour first moved in, I thought we would be friends,” says our submitter in Montreal. “We go to the same school, we’re around the same age, and we both love pets. (I have a cat and a dog, she has four cats.)” And yes, she says, “Every day — after 10 a.m., before 8 p.m. — I vacuum my house. She can have fun with all her cat-hair dust bunnies — I’ll stick to my cleaning schedule, thanks!”

Like our submitter in Montreal, I’ll admit that, as the owner of a dog who sheds quite a bit, I also vacuum pretty much every day. So if that makes me a “FILTHY DIRTBAG,” I guess I prefer that to becoming like “Dirty Lady #2.”

related: I’m dirty and I love it

Our anonymous submitter in L.A. says this opus was posted at the kitchen of a production company working on a network television show…where at least two people seem to have too much time on their hands.

related: Dear Desperate for Salad

The office break room: where everything is somebody else’s responsibility.

related: I am clearly too busy writing notes, so could somebody less important than me take care of this?

Writes our submitter in Canada: “Of the 12 people living the house, only three do any sort of cleaning or washing up. This was the result of several months of accumulated angst.”

related: I did the dishes. Where’s my cookie?