Dear late-night cat: plz discipline ur lady. kthxbai.

related: Please walk your elephant quietly!

Apparently everyone is “doing it wrong,” says our submitter in Colorado.

related: THIS IS NOT A METH LAB

You might recall the letter that Bill and Mara received from a stranger informing that “no one cares about your damn wedding.” Despite Andrew from the Internet’s professed apathy, it seems he had enough time on his hands to not just comb through Bill’s blog, but Bill and Mara’s wedding guestbook as well.

Bill says a family member, mistakenly assuming that the guestbook entries could only be viewed by friends and family, left a note about having moved, including their new address. “We soon caught the message and removed the address,” Bill says, “but not before Andrew saw the page.”

related: My name is Andrew, and I’m from the Internet.

Bill from Florida and his bride, Mara, both electrical engineering majors, decided to infuse their passion for their field into their “Circuit and Swirls”-themed wedding, complete with invitations featuring actual LED-running circuits. In the DIY spirit of things, Bill posted a video and a how-to guide on his blog. (So far, so good.)

A month or so later, after Bill and Mara returned from their honeymoon, they found this handwritten manifesto — excuse me, concerned warning — in their mailbox. (Because apparently plain ol’ Internet bile-spewing via, you know, the Internet would have been a little bit too passive.)

related: Cloudy with a chance of hate mail

Steve in Los Angeles says his dog has been having some separation anxiety, typically crying for about 30 minutes to an hour after Steve leaves for work. He recently found this oh-so-helpful advice taped to his front door. (His response: “WTF?!”)

Steve, just to put things in perspective, you might want to take a look at the Chicago approach:

related: My bite is work than your bark

Shortly after he moved out, our submitter in Canada discovered that her ex-roommate had glued a memo for the room’s future occupant inside his bedroom closet — “his final passive-aggressive attempt to get under my skin.”

related: You’re not as bad as everyone warned me you’d be!

I know I’m asking for trouble here, but when John in Missouri passed along this exchange between his father’s neighbor (an “interested animal lover”) and his father (a reluctant one), I just couldn’t resist.

Confidential to John’s Dad: I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

related: The Great Outdoor Cat Debate of 2012

Jen in Concord, Massachusetts is pretty sure she has a Romney supporter to thank for the friendly note left on her car during a recent trip to Target.

“Fortunately,” she says, “the Obama sticker (which is actually a magnet and very easily removed) was left intact, as was the Darwin fish.”

UPDATE: Closer to the election, Samantha was surprised to find a similar (copycat?) note on her car in the President’s hometown of Chicago.

related: Herbie goes to Washington; When Mavericks Attack

A few months ago, Christie in North Carolina joined a group on Meetup.com, but never found the time to attend any of the actual meetups. This, it seems, is a serious breach of Meetup netiquette. Recently, the group’s owner did Christie the favor of explaining why she was being kicked out of the group — for her own benefit, of course.

While perusing the magazines at Barnes & Noble, Shelly found this bit of divine snark affixed to the latest XBOX magazine.

Haterz still will hate, I guess?

related: Cigarettes & energy drinks