Entries Tagged as 'office supplies'

Please don’t treat the stapler like you treat your farm animals

November 1st, 2011 · 51 Comments

This brilliantly understated little note comes to us from a campus library at the University of Auckland, where submitter Louise says the staplers do seem to get jammed into disrepair on a fairly regular basis.

This stapler is now in perfect mechanical condition. It works just fine. Please do not abuse the stapler. Remember: This is just an ordinary stapler, not a rocket powered attaching device. It will NOT staple together half a ream of paper. Unlike a plowing mule, hitting it really hard will not make the stapler work harder to accomplish your goal.

(I have to admit that I kinda love this one. Hat tip to you, librarian!)

related: (Insert Office Space reference here)

extra credit: A rocket-powered detaching device

Tags: fed-up librarian · most popular notes of 2011 · New Zealand · office supplies

Who steals pens from disabled children???

August 31st, 2010 · 42 Comments

At Nat’s office in York, England, one of his coworkers has been trying to bully everyone into coughing up some cash for an (admittedly worthy) charitable cause.

In Nat’s opinion, however, her guilt-heavy fund-raising techniques might benefit from a little fine-tuning…especially given that all seven of those special “charity pens” were nicked from the office supply closet.

Seriously people, who keeps stealing pens (7 of them!) from a disabled=

related: Starve on!

Tags: "accidental" "borrowing" · a matter of taste · bar · confusion??? · guilt trip · Miami · MYOB · not wrong · office · office supplies · rebuttals · U.K.

(Insert Office Space reference here)

October 6th, 2009 · 118 Comments

There’s a Milton in every cubicle farm, it seems…and I believe you have his stapler.

passiveaggressivenotes.com - i believe you have my stapler

And a Dwight and a Jim…

(Just click on the image below to enlarge!)

I Believe You Have My Stapler

related: that’d be great

Tags: office · office supplies

Just another picture to burn

January 21st, 2009 · 74 Comments

Our anonymous submitter in Pittsburgh says this note was sitting atop a copy-room filing cabinet — and a stack of 50 or so identical print-outs of the Jo Bros. “Guess someone in the office is on Team Taylor Swift!”

GREAT USE OF RESOURCES!

related: Let’s not mince words

extra credit: Taylor Swift’s passive-aggressive swipe at Joe Jonas [youtube]

Tags: ex drama · office · office supplies · Pittsburgh

The missing exhibit from the Carousel of Progress

August 18th, 2008 · 114 Comments

Sorcia McNasty in North Carolina says this “piece of art” is located right next to the paper supply drawer in her office.  “We’re not sure if there is really a problem with theft or if occasionally, you know, the machine just runs out of paper. No one wants to question the MACHINE IN MOTION.”

DID YOU KNOW??? The facsimile machine is not only a piece of art, but also a MACHINE IN MOTION. Sadly, it cannot perform its motion if there is no paper. Please allow our MACHINE IN MOTION to stay in MOTION by not stealing its paper.

related: The passive-aggressive note has not been destroyed; it has been solved

Tags: clip art catastrophe · Did you know? · fax · office supplies · the fax machine · WTF?

This is not positive communication

February 6th, 2008 · 78 Comments

This series comes to us from an anonymous office worker in Sydney, Australia, who explains: “Despite our multi-million dollar profits, some people in our office are really attached to our company’s bottom line.”

DID YOU REALLY NEED TO PRINT THIS IN COLOUR??

UPDATE: the saga continues!

GET BACK TO WORK. WRITING POST-ITS FOR THIS WALL IS A WASTE OF COMPANY TIME. SHAME ON YOU ALL.

related: Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler

Tags: money · office supplies · saga · Sydney

Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler

September 19th, 2007 · 265 Comments

Attention: corporate emergency in the Chicagoland area!

but then they switched from the swingline to the boston stapler

Meanwhile, in Seattle…

thank you so much for your collaborations

Adds our anonymous submitter, “All the glassware for all departments is washed by the poor lab slaves at least twice a day, and then promptly returned to the shelves. How much glassware are they using that they notice if a beaker or two went missing?”

Tags: a little uptight · and that's an order · Chicago · crazy boss · excessive underlining · not-so-veiled threats · office · office supplies · Seattle · spelling and grammar police